Best Bass for Bar Fights?

[Humbled]

Was it a Zappa or Little Feat album that credited a guy for playing something simply identified as: "Groove Bludgeon" ... ?

 

[john_g]

Steinbergers...headless makes a great handle to swing with and you can beat several drunks without putting a dent in it.

 

[Zooberwerx]

Any Bunker tension-free neck. Provided you have ample time and a few hex keys, the entire rod (cold-rolled steel bar) can be drawn from the end of the neck like Excalibur. Beat the hell out of your opponent, replace, tune-up, and finish the set.

Riis

 

[SirMjac28]

A P bass with the rigidity of a unicorn horn that also shoots black mamba venom.

 

[JMacBass65]

A slab-body Precision.

Original and still the best for brawling.

.

This!

 

[JMacBass65]

I always thought my Rick would make a good weapon, as my friend is demonstrating in this pic:

 

[StyleOverShow]

so:
you're looking for an instrument you can physically beat people with?

that's so wrong, on so many levels, I don't even know where to start.
FAIL.

Absolutely true, however "working" around alcohol (& other substances) fueled crowds, at night, loud music and that just seems to be the right mix for bruhahas. Generally we can stay clear, unless we are the target.

BTW this thread reminds me of the best zombie head smasher bass back when Walking Dead was a thing. If memory serves the Precision was prominent there, living up to its 70's advertising line "the road machine".

 

[FishDub]

My "dream bass" for a fight would be a all carbon fiber Steinberger. It already looks like a weapon, and it will not break.

+1.. I would take my Steiny if I needed to!

 

[firechariot]

Honestly, you guys are all fracking NUTS! ( most of you at least )
Have you really ever Swung your bass hard, and hit someone in the head with it?
Would You? Really?
I'll tell ya....
I've been in 2 situations in my life where I swung and hit someone in the head with an Acoustic 6 String
guitar,(1 steel string,1 nylon) and both times I worried that I'd done serious damage to them.
The first guy bought a 6" cut along the right side of his head, blood donation, and a slight loss of consciousness, and the second guy bought some fresh sleeptime on the pavement . And these were hollow bodied acoustic guitars. Not Basses. After the 1st one, I clearly remember what the Native American Man standing next to me said: "You coulda killed him maan."
I can only imagine what damage you could do with a fruckn club like an electric bass guitar. You're gonn Murder someone.....
Never Again for me. I simply learned how to foresee trouble and step around it .

 

[firechariot]

Actually, I started reading this post because I mistakenly thought that you were looking for the best bass(music) for(to play during) a bar fight. Yea....a little off.

 

[Humbled]

Actually, I started reading this post because I mistakenly thought that you were looking for the best bass(music) for(to play during) a bar fight...

 

[Phil508]

I would use this one , then I won't lose any sleep over it..

 

[mc900ftj]

Ok, so I'm getting ready for my first bar gig in quite a while and it crossed my mind that I should probably use a bass that strikes a nice balance of on stage presence and tone yet could easily be used as a weapon if necessary. I'm thinking my Squier P will do it. Can afford to destroy it if necessary and looks pretty cool doing it although I do wish I still had my Cort Steinberger. That thing was essentially a baseball bat with strings!

Any other options I should consider?

One of my ash P's.

 

[JMacBass65]

Local boys!!!!

 

[Humbled]

Oh boy do I have some Nighthawks stories, and one of them actually involves that very song being played during a barfight that ended in gunfire (no one hit), but I'll spare everyone the details to protect the unindicted. It was a long time ago...

 

[trevcda]

My favorite would be my old red Charvel Model 1B bass from the 80's. Heavy as hell and quite pointy in places!

 

[mb94952]

I would use this one , then I won't lose any sleep over it..

This is the RADDEST bass, EVER !!! I LOVE those light switches. Simply brilliant. ( Pun intended ). Now this is the definition of a bass with tons of MOJO and personality.

 

[Jim C]

I am assuming that this is all a big joke ha,ha.
But maybe some of you are serious.
This whole thing is wrong, uncreative, and just plain stupid.
Usually the guys that talk the most about a provocative subject are the least likely to do anything whether it be sex, violence, etc.

OTOH, in my drunken youth, I have played some clubs that I had to walk a distance to get to from/to the safe parking lot.
I carried mace and occasionally a knife.
Do you have the stones to actually watch someone bleed to death or die from your hand?
If not, you got no business even asking.

I did sub in with a band that opened for Ivan Neville.
Didn't know these guys well and was a little surprised when a .45 fell out the back of the guitar players amp.
Nobody was that alarmed; another good reason to stay sober…

 

[basscow]

I really took it as more of a defense mechanism. My thunderbird could block whatever could be thrown my way, except for maybe small planets/moons.

 

[dewolfe03]

This one is a proven fighter. Ask Vader.