i'm gonna trash one of my own boys here a little simply because i feel like writing. i love these guys to death - i really do. feel blessed to have what i feel is a really tight supportive family..... but.... keep in mind we're all adults. over age 30. last night drummer santo's very flirtatious girlfriend invites an ex-boyfriend and his friends to come to our show. now that's the most brilliant idea i've heard in a long time. since high school. all's well till she starts getting drunk. we're playing, they're playing, nothing too serious but a lot of touching, hugging, stupid stuff. santo and girlfriend begin going at it. going at it when drunk never solves anything, so it of course escalates. she's being totally unreasonable. she decides to leave right smack in the middle of a cover of venus. he jumps off the friggin stage and chases her out the door. "Any drumers in the house?" luckily, the bar owner himself was a closet drummer and wanted to know if we could pull off honky tonk women. we could, and we did. santo's girl disappeared with the guys..... santo gets very, very, drunk, pretty much the end of the story. we managed to squeeze another 4 or 5 songs out of him. it was the last set anyhow. on a softer, more gentler and nicer note - we've been doing really well in smaller "crappy" bars (as someone in another thread titled them) by being honest with and really working with the owners. the owner of this place and another we recently started playing LOVES us and they're both doing everything they can to spread the word and pack these places when we play. the main thing we did differently was decide to accept less money - we're taking $90 a man, which comes out to $270 for the band. they can't get a another decent band at that price. the bars are happy and they promise to give us more as they take in more. i believe them. the bar we played last night is about an hour's drive from where i live and we met a bunch of people from my neighborhood because the owner told them they really have to come down and check out this band. makes it easy to want to work with him. what's my point? i think it's that i'm learning it's a good thing to be flexible and friendly with the barowners and NOT treat them like the enemy. if they're jerks it's usually written all over their faces, and we don't play their bars. we're finding a lot of nice people - finally. perhaps we can chalk it up to experience.