• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join free Log in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

Can you be to picky when looking for a band?

#62
LBS-bass said:
The only time that's ever worth it for me is when I'm doing it to help support less experienced players who need a little help. People were there for me when I first started out, and I feel like it's ok to be there for others at this stage of my life. It can be challenging to keep expectations realistic in those situations, but if you genuinely like the people, it can be worthwhile.
Click to expand...

I completely agree something like that could be worthwhile, and I've been a teacher (not music) for most of my career so I like that role. In fact, I have taken that type of role in some previous bands, especially working with a less experienced drummer. So I have considered this perspective, and maybe I should think about it a little more, but at this point I don't think it will be very worthwhile.
 
#63
Nedmundo said:
I completely agree something like that could be worthwhile, and I've been a teacher (not music) for most of my career so I like that role. I have considered this perspective, and maybe I should think about it a little more, but at this point I don't think it will be very worthwhile.
Click to expand...
Yeah, it only works if you're in it for that reason. If you just join a crappy band thinking it's going to become a good band, it never works. I thought about this a lot during the Covid hiatus because I was always looking to up my game with better bands and better players. I realized I was never paying anything forward that way, only trying too hard to burnish my reputation. So now I am a lot less worried about how things look and just trying to be a good person and have a little fun.
 
  • Like
Reactions: JRA, Nedmundo and thebreakman
#64
devnulljp said:
I gave up on the idea of bands really, and consider myself a sideman so I play with just about anyone and everyone. Got a couple of main projects, but if there's a half-decent gig with some $$ I'll play.
Click to expand...

That's what I do, too, but it sounds like the OP has been off the scene raising kids and doesn't have good connections in the local scene. Like you, I'm technically in a couple of bands, but I'm really just a sideman.

As I get older, I'm concerned that I'm less visible on the scene so less likely to get calls. The pandemic hasn't helped, of course. One guy who has been hiring me since the mid 80s is retiring to New Orleans which dries up a lot of work. I'm back to going out to see my friends playing and remind them I'm still out and about.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LBS-bass
#67
be picky! life's too short to play music that you don't like. (of course unless you are getting $$ and A$$)
Depending on your location, I've found that bass decent bassists can always get gigs. Every city craigslist has a ton of BPW ads.
I was on the "play with just about anyone as long as it's a good gig" train many years ago, but I really wanted something more. Eventually, I met a couple of players who wanted what I wanted, and we started a band, picked a name, and now, almost 15 years later, we are still having the time of our lives, playing great music, doing fun gigs all over the place, getting paid.

My take is, keep yourself out there, in front of people, so you can meet other like minded folks that you can eventually make a band with. No better way to meet other musicians than gigging.
When people see you on stage, having a blast with your friends and making fun music, it's infectious!
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gothic
#68
brianrost said:
That's what I do, too, but it sounds like the OP has been off the scene raising kids and doesn't have good connections in the local scene. Like you, I'm technically in a couple of bands, but I'm really just a sideman.

As I get older, I'm concerned that I'm less visible on the scene so less likely to get calls. The pandemic hasn't helped, of course. One guy who has been hiring me since the mid 80s is retiring to New Orleans which dries up a lot of work. I'm back to going out to see my friends playing and remind them I'm still out and about.
Click to expand...
That was my thing to at the start -- taken time off when kiddo was little, got back into it by joining one band, that got me asked to sub for another, they asked me to join, so now I was in 2 bands, someone else saw me play with one of them and asked me to play with them so now I'm playing with 3 projects and it just kind of snowballed from there. Met people, got asked to do theatre gigs, recording projects, one-offs, all sorts of stuff. Good way to hone your playing too. Before the pandemic, I usually had at least one gig a week. I've played local festivals where I was on stage pretty much all day -- played one with 4 different bands, packed up my stuff and headed out to a bar gig that night. First week of lockdown, I had 5 shows scheduled ... all of which got cancelled of course.
So, based on my experience, don't let the fact that it might not be perfect, join up, play out, and that gets you back into the scene better than just hanging around waiting for the right one to come along.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Slough Feg Bass
#69
It's a subjective question. Musicianship and personalities are important to me. The level of required musicianship would be a personal preference I suppose but I think most of us want little to no egos and zero narcissism.
 
#72
instrumentalist said:
It happens to many of us: you play music when you're young, then when you start a family you find you're not getting around to it any more. Years later, when the kids have grown up and aren't taking so much time anymore, you go back to playing.

The same is true for many hobbies.
Click to expand...
There was room for interpretation of what "post kids" meant. I actually thought it meant, well I'm not a kid anymore, so I'm going to try and join my first adult band.

Room for interpretation.
 
#75
wazzel said:
I am currently looking for my post kids band. Had one audition that went well, but turned it down since it was classic rock. I have another on the books, but will probably back out since it is metal. I know what I would like to do, radio friendly alternative music from the 80's and 90's, but I can not find an opening. Should I just take a gig, or wait it out. Neither of the bands I mentioned are actually gigging now.
Click to expand...
depends how much the "need" is for how you are feeling....if you really feel that gigging/playing-with-others part of you is missing and leaving a deficit in your life, any band now will do........if its not such a detriment, then don't and wait for something more to your liking comes along -- but, if you feel the latter, stop auditioning for bands and turning them down otherwise you will get a reputation as a tease ;)
 
#77
I played for 4 years in a Country Band playing old standards. I absolutely hated the music but there were no bands around that needed a bassist...the musicians were ok plus the money wasn't bad.

I then formed my own band (30 years ago). I have played with 10 different people in this time frame but 'stuck to my guns"...Classic Rock/Motown/Current Country...it really pays to take what's available with an eye to the future!!
 
#78
My 1st paying gig was 53 years ago, so I no longer feel I NEED to be in a band....YMMV. But yeah, I am now very picky, though early on I wasn't. The people, the music, the talent, all have to be right. I gig less now, and that's OK.
 
#79
I've been pretty lucky in that the past two bands I've been, still with one, have been music outside of my preferred genres but have all been quality people I've enjoyed meeting and playing with. I keep my eyes open for bands playing my preferred genres and will do both if I can.
 

Latest posts

Top Bottom
Back