• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join freeLog in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

Combat or Child Care?

She knew when she joined up that she could be deployed. She should either have had plans for someone to take in the kid under those circumstances, or not joined up in the first place. And - where is kid's father and/or father's family? Kid didn't come into being without a male in the picture somewhere. To me, this sounds 'way to much like someone who is trying really hard to get out of being deployed, cynical ex-military type that I am... and one who hates when this gets pulled, as it's mostly women who do this, and it gives those who seriously think women should not be in the military more ammunition.
 
She knew when she joined up that she could be deployed. She should either have had plans for someone to take in the kid under those circumstances, or not joined up in the first place. And - where is kid's father and/or father's family? Kid didn't come into being without a male in the picture somewhere. To me, this sounds 'way to much like someone who is trying really hard to get out of being deployed, cynical ex-military type that I am... and one who hates when this gets pulled, as it's mostly women who do this, and it gives those who seriously think women should not be in the military more ammunition.

I agree, the Dad or his family needs to step up unless something is really wrong with them.
 
It sounds like she had a plan and that her "plan" bailed of her at the last moment. What was she supposed to do?

There isn't a chance in hell that I would leave my kid to be raised by the system for what they claim will be a year. Nope. I do believe I'd head south and become Pookie Sanchez before that would happen.

OTOH, I do believe that she could have found a way to work this out with the Army before things got to this point.
 
I agree, the Dad or his family needs to step up unless something is really wrong with them.
i agree with you on this one ...
as Trooper Farva pointed out , the child may be the end result of a one night stand ,
the story just said that the mother is " no longer in a relationship "with the father ..
Her mom runs a daycare.
Hmmm.
:hiding:
yeah , i just re-read the story and noticed that .
her mom says the child is an infant , and needs 24 hour care ...?
René_Julien;8252995 said:
What about all the fathers who must leave their children for a long time
when they go on a tour of duty?
good question .
wives ?
in-laws ?
:confused:
i would imagine single fathers would also have to be considered as future " hardship cases ",
if this woman is allowed any special considerations by the Army...
hmmmm. :hmm:
 
René_Julien;8252995 said:
What about all the fathers who must leave their children for a long time when they go on a tour of duty?

In most cases they are leaving the children with their mothers. I don't think this would be an issue if the father were in the picture and willing/able to take the child.

It's not that she isn't willing to leave the child to do her duty but she is not willing to leave the child as a ward of the state while she does so.
 
The bit about not being in a relationship with the father is lame. Parents need to grow up and understand they have responsibilities whether they like each other anymore or not.

One way or another, an arrangement has to be made because the Mom needs to do her duty since she is in the Army.
 
In most cases they are leaving the children with their mothers. I don't think this would be an issue if the father were in the picture and willing/able to take the child.

It's not that she isn't willing to leave the child to do her duty but she is not willing to leave the child as a ward of the state while she does so.

Yes, I agree that this is a difficult case.

I don't mean to come of as inhuman, but her carreer choice is not compatible with her private life.
Being in the military, you have a responsibility to your country. So get your private affairs in order or leave the military.
I also see the other side of it too,... if I had a (young) child that I need to take care of and nobody could help, I would tend to desert too.


That's why I never went into the army.
(To be honest... I failed my Dutch exam when going through all the tests for officer.)
 
She knew when she joined up that she could be deployed. She should either have had plans for someone to take in the kid under those circumstances, or not joined up in the first place. And - where is kid's father and/or father's family? Kid didn't come into being without a male in the picture somewhere. To me, this sounds 'way to much like someone who is trying really hard to get out of being deployed, cynical ex-military type that I am... and one who hates when this gets pulled, as it's mostly women who do this, and it gives those who seriously think women should not be in the military more ammunition.

+1 on that