Does your better half...

[catcauphonic]

I think it's really cool that after that much time you aren't using any excuse you can to get AWAY from each other, and still WANT to be around each other as much as possible. Unless you're codependent ... which is a different issue entirely

 

[InhumanResource]

(edited)
Guys, I enjoy playing jams/open mics. My wife goes, but sometimes she really don't want to go but goes anyway. Her job is hard on fridays and the Jam is 8pm-12am . I usually go 2 or 3 times per month. I don't want to miss playing. She says to go without her. I go just to play, not for drinking or women.
How do you guys feel about this ?

Sounds great to me!

 

[BurnOut]

My wife rarely goes to gigs, bars aren't really her thing, and that way I don't have to go to flower/craft things, as it works both ways

 

[micguy]

You're the bassist. Unless you're 100 times better looking than the singer and/or lead guitarist, there's no problem.

 

[buldog5151bass]

Sometimes she goes - depends on our schedule and the music I am playing.

Ya know, you both are allowed to have your own life...

 

[fhm555]

So are you worried someone is going to trick you?

"Let me show you a magic trick. I'm going to need your pants."

 

[tangentmusic]

I think it's great you have a supportive and trusting wife.

Too many times it's quite the opposite.
Many a musical endeavor has crashed and burned because of the insecurity of a spouse or SO.
I've seen it all too often.

Appreciate what you have with her.

 

[Roxbororob]

There is also nothing wrong with skipping open mic night once in a while and surprise her with a stay in dinner and movie.

 

[Gearhead17]

Time away from your wife is a GOOD thing. If you avoid her all the time, then you will not have a wife. Which may be OK, but there goes your money for bass gear.

 

[Robert B]

It's all good. It's inevitable that it gets old for them. Same music week after week, surrounded by drunks and people acting silly. They only get to be with you a few minutes out of each hour if that. Plus the late hours. Nothing wrong with them staying at home and maybe coming out once in awhile for a couple hours for the cooler gigs.

 

[HolmeBass]

Nothing is wrong with my marriage, married 35 years, maybe I did not ask my question correctly. Main thing is going to a bar to play without their wife. We ususlly do everything together. But she is so tired on Friday night.

Yeah, you didn't really ask a question at all. None of us know what the question is, we're all guessing.

But if it's along the lines of, "Shouldn't my wife come and support me at all of my gigs?" The answer is, "Hell no!" That is *a lot* to ask of someone. Be happy when she come to the bigger and better gigs and let her live her own life. If you try and force her to come to all of your gigs she'll grow to resent it and your musical endeavors in general. Everyone needs space in any relationship.

If that's not the question, maybe try asking us something in the form of a specific question.

 

[ray fan]

My wife never went to gigs. Now I don't gig. I used to play in church, now we don't go to church very often.

 

[Savage_Dreams]

this is seriously a question?
im single, but i wish i had the problem of having a wife that trusts me enough to go out alone.

 

[40Hz]

Sounds like you're right where my lady and me are with that.

My GF and I are mostly into the same things. So we do a lot together. Far more than most couples we know. But those few things we don't share a common interest in (ex: her=horseback riding; me=scriptwriting) don't create any problems for us. If she wants to do something I'm not all that interested in doing too, and she wants to do it by herself, that's fine by me. (I'm actually grateful, although I do tag along from time to time just to show support.) And the same goes for her. We don't ever feel the need to check up on each other, or "protect our interests," like some couples do.

It drives some of our friends crazy we're "so trusting" - whatever that means.. But that's their problem.

 

[JakobT]

If she doesn't mind, neither should you.

 

[JRA]

my "better half" picks and chooses which of my gigs (if any) she might attend based on the value to her. she might choose to attend more if i didn't have to set up and tear down. even when she does check out a gig: it's a local one, she drives separately or with someone else, she leaves when she's had enough, yada yada. i'm good with that!

as for the drinking and the other women: i still drink!

 

[cnltb]

(edited)
Guys, I enjoy playing jams/open mics. My wife goes, but sometimes she really don't want to go but goes anyway. Her job is hard on fridays and the Jam is 8pm-12am . I usually go 2 or 3 times per month. I don't want to miss playing. She says to go without her. I go just to play, not for drinking or women.
How do you guys feel about this ?

That you even mention drinking and women in your post would give me something to think about.

 

[TrevorOfDoom]

A gig is not a social call. It's work, and every day is NOT "Bring Your Spouse To Work" Day.
Let her come when she wants to, and go without her when she doesn't.
The jams are for you, not her, right?

 

[MJ_Sotti]

Mine comes to the better gigs. But my eyes still work. I don't mix with the bar during breaks, the drunks annoy me.

I'm nearsighted usually don't wear the glasses. So one gig she wasn't going to come. So I see this big blondie paying at the door and I'm like "whoa look at THIS", and I'm feeling checked out.

Do I figure i at least walk past her table during the break...it was the bride. Felt pretty good

 

[Lowness]

Nothing is wrong with my marriage, married 35 years, maybe I did not ask my question correctly. Main thing is going to a bar to play without their wife. We ususlly do everything together. But she is so tired on Friday night.

You don't sound Western, which may explain the concern.

You don't have to do everything with your wife. This is not a bass issue, it is a relationship issue.

You need to visit another forum.