Everyone Wants to Jam with Me, I'm Scared

[el murdoque]

What kind of stuff should I be doing to get myself to be jam ready besides learning scales and learning to identify pitches by ear?

Also, at what point in playing bass did you feel comfortable with the idea of playing alongside others?

Your guitar friends are more than happy if you're able to pound out root notes in a halfway steady pattern.

When I was 14, I joined a band, then bought a bass. I came home with the bass and had the first rehearsal on the evening of that day. The guitarists showed me which side is up and how to fret a note.
I played happily with the others (who were also quite happy) until I started dripping blood on the carpet (actually quite a bit longer - until the carpet owner noticed).

I started with lessons a while later.

 

[steve_ss]

I've been playing bass for six years now. I was so embarrassed to play in front of my teacher I had to quit and just play at home. On behalf of 'those who are to afraid to play with others', please go out and jam with your friends. Ask them up front to be nice, have fun with it, and tell us how you make out. You can do it!!!

 

[Sacha 2A]

Lobster 11 has perfectly said what you could do : "I suggest that you put heads together with one or more of these friends and come up with a list of simple songs that you can work on in advance. A lot of blues are simple 3-chord progressions, and the songs I first "jammed" with friend on when I was learning. Then you'll know what to expect and can prepare as much in advance as possible". And even though some of the comments don't agree with that, I am sure that all your friends know how to jam on a blues.

 

[BassDad1964]

Dive in. Keep your ears open to what everyone around you is doing. Be open to feedback. Work on everything and show up each time better than the last time.

Here you see the TB phenomenon of the first response to a TB post being the most correct.

 

[JRA]

...at what point in playing bass did you feel comfortable with the idea of playing alongside others?

it wasn't "playing bass" for me, but i was comfortable "playing alongside others" from the beginning --- some of them had a bit more experience than me, but none of them were any more 'ready'.

i'm with the 'jump in and see what happens' crowd...it will help you calibrate for your next jam, and it'll be fun! good luck!

 

[Wannabebass]

I’m the weakest member of the guys I play with- if your buds are as forgiving as my guys are you will be fine, and improve quickly. Agreed at the very least try to decide on a few simple songs you can all do. Don’t shy away from the opportunity!

 

[PennyroyalWe]

My first day of playing I was playing with a guitarist. 7th grade, with my buddy down the street who had been playing violin, then guitar for a few years (he was 2 yrs older than I). He showed me how to read tabs, first song - “Smells Like Teen Spirit”, and we jammed in that for about 15-20 minutes I bet hahaha.

If these folks are eager to get you to play with them, I would think they wouldn’t mind showing you a thing or two while you’re playing as well.

 

[MCF]

Heya @pabs — I was in the exact same position when I started to play several decades ago! IMO, nothing helps you learn faster than trying to jam with other people — especially those who are better than you!

I like @Lobster11's suggestion: Ask them for a few songs and practice playing roots against those changes. Then as you can play some simple changes like those @mambo4 mentioned, then you can take more folks up on offers — and you can always let folks know, "hey I'm a total beginner, but I'd be happy to try and play some basic stuff"

Scales are useful to learn (of course) but as a beginner, it's really all about being able to play roots against the chords in a rhythmic way — with a few simple step-ups to roots, and then maybe some 5ths and 3rds thrown in. Listening to the bass lines of the songs you're trying to learn (and using charts and/or play along videos on Youtube) is also a great way to quickly get better.

Have fun!

This.

To learn songs and chord changes, you might give Chordify a try. Start with the root notes and as @Bioflava mentions, go from there.

 

[Bass-Babe]

I've been learning bass for almost 3 weeks now and I've had 3 separate guitarist friends ask me multiple times to jam with them soon, they've all got at least 3 years of consistent playing experience under their belts meanwhile this is the first time I've touched an instrument (used to play violin) in 4 years. Bassists are in short supply in the scene so I know they're all waiting for the moment they can snatch me up into their bands. The idea of trying to play in front of any of them, let alone play a good bassline, is extremely daunting. I just don't feel like I have enough skill developed yet.

What kind of stuff should I be doing to get myself to be jam ready besides learning scales and learning to identify pitches by ear?

Also, at what point in playing bass did you feel comfortable with the idea of playing alongside others?

Don't sweat it, go for it.
Let me tell you why... My spouse has been singing and in vocal lessons for many year as a hobby. The teacher tries to get self accompany as lessons progress , she needed a bass player for what she was planning so handed my spouse a bass and said here "do this" in 2017.She did'nt much play after barely at all that much. Fast forward to pandemic we met some long time neighbours around a lockdown incurred outdoor firepit during in feb 2022. Turns out they (a couple) are semi retired longtime professional musicians (he 50years playing(in fact just played with elvis costello in NY) her 35ish years singing and guitar) they have multiple Juno awards and grammy noms and are in 3 very different type bands now just as a retirement hobby..
I mentioned my spouse plays a little bass, immediately they asked to jam with them. Fast forward my spouse has now gone on mini tours with them last august with more to come and is now formally part of the band , gigging and mini tours in under 1 year .Your never now.
Just play, learn and have fun and stay in the "pocket"

 

[Jefenator]

If you wanted more time to get proficient before getting hit with a bunch of jamming offers, you should have chosen the accordion.
My first year in music school, I used to impersonate Kermit the frog and sing: "It's not easy being green". That usually broke the ice with my more seasoned band mates.
Consider yourself fortunate; there is absolutely no better way of learning than to perform with players who are better than you.
Try not to apologize for lack of experience - especially when they're the ones approaching you. If you're doing the best you can, no one can ask for more than that.
But: maintaining a positive attitude is also a good idea. (I'd rather work with a newbie who is keen to cooperate & learn than an experienced player who is a stubborn jerk.)
It sounds like even at this stage, you might have to learn how to maintain some life balance & say "no thanks" to some offers. (I'm still working on that one...)

 

[SaucyJackBass]

If it is just jam sessions
1. Don't be afraid to ask the chord progression
2. Watch the rhythm guitarist fingers, you can learn songs just by figuring out what he is playing
3. When unsure, just play root.
4. Find where a turn around is and play something simple like Root, Lower 5th, Root, 2nd. Easiest turn around out there and leads the next chord progression nicely.
5. Experiment with slides and walks into the next note instead of just waiting until 1 to play the new root.

 

[mikenyc]

For me, there has been a big difference between a jam session with no audience, or folks getting together to form a band, and a gig. I spent way too long at home trying to learn scales and just playing along with recordings etc. -- I should have started going to jam sessions about 10 years sooner. Once I did, yes, i felt nervous and I sometimes didn't know what to play, but it got better, and now after a couple years I know a bunch of folks to play with. And the main things I have learned, I never would have learned at home.

Here are the things that helped me get comfortable and make progress:

- learn the notes (like, 5th fret and below for starters)
- get comfortable just playing a rhythm on the root note (like, match the kick drum then add anything else that's needed)
- get comfortable making chord changes -- if you can hit the new root note right on the '1', and kinda keep your rhythm together, IME other people will want to play with you again (if they're not super-advanced)
- listen to the song as a whole and use the rhythm to make the song feel good
- once you can play root notes, learn where the fifth is located, and add that in sometimes
- then, add the root note one octave up sometimes
- AND, whenever there is a chance to play with other people, play with other people. Sometimes it will be great sometimes it may be meh, but for me it has always helped me advance.

The one book that really prepared me to play with other people was 'Bass Grooves' by Ed Friedland. It teaches the common rhythms you'll see of course. But the main thing for me was, it teaches you how to be intentional about your note length -- the start of the note is really obvious in how it fits into a rhythm. But the end of the note, and rests, are also a big part. And sometimes the space between the notes can be the most dramatic thing you play. The exercises are simple, but they helped me absorb some concepts that have made me way steadier as a part of the rhythm section.

I hope you get out there and give it a try -- and if you do it once and it isn't the right situation or right people to start with, find someone else! Good luck --

 

[waver]

I suggest that you put heads together with one or more of these friends and come up with a list of simple songs that you can work on in advance. A lot of blues are simple 3-chord progressions, and the songs I first "jammed" with friend on when I was learning. Then you'll know what to expect and can prepare as much in advance as possible.

Also, be completely honest with them: Tell them that you don't feel like you've learned enough yet to start playing with others -- but that you'd be willing to try if they'll "put up with" you and help you out.

This. A few years ago I was a flutist & sax player. As the bass player in our 5-piece band was preparing to move out of town, he and the guitarist spent considerable time with me, teaching me bass and how to play our song list on bass. Now I’m primarily a bass player and loving it!

 

[pabs]

If you're young I doubt these young guitar players are doing blues etc. where any theory is useful.

What do they want to play? That's kind of the #1 question. Like someone else said, find common ground on maybe 2 songs and woodshed those 2. Go from there.

Shoegaze, loooooots of shoegaze. I love shoegaze but sometimes the bassline can be hard to discern through the fuzz.

 

[LiptonJigglers]

Scales and patterns.
If I read correctly, they're just as novice as you. Don't stress. Relax and enjoy the learning curve.
Gotta start somewhere.

I picked my first bass up in 2007.
3 weeks in, I played my first gig.
All I knew was: these are the songs, which I knew intimately... these are the notes to play and in this order.
15+ years later, still no lessons and playing in original bands and covers... just don't ask me to slap...

 

[salmon256]

Shoegaze, loooooots of shoegaze. I love shoegaze but sometimes the bassline can be hard to discern through the fuzz.

I'm a giant indie fan. I agree those basslines can be hard to hear or too fuzzy at times lol, learning theory for sure will put you ahead. Depending on the band playing shoegaze, a lot I have listen to is really just the root notes, however my shoegaze knowledge is limited! You probably heard of this band, but Her's is an awesome indie duo. The bassist Audun Laading is amazing and goes hard in songs. (They are consider a form of shoegaze but I know aren't exact.) Obv I would recommend just being chill to start with, but as you get know groups or jams don't feel afraid to channel your personality or style! Good luck!

 

[Jazzdogg]

I've been learning bass for almost 3 weeks now and I've had 3 separate guitarist friends ask me multiple times to jam with them soon, they've all got at least 3 years of consistent playing experience under their belts meanwhile this is the first time I've touched an instrument (used to play violin) in 4 years. Bassists are in short supply in the scene so I know they're all waiting for the moment they can snatch me up into their bands. The idea of trying to play in front of any of them, let alone play a good bassline, is extremely daunting. I just don't feel like I have enough skill developed yet.

What kind of stuff should I be doing to get myself to be jam ready besides learning scales and learning to identify pitches by ear?

Also, at what point in playing bass did you feel comfortable with the idea of playing alongside others?

Don't worry about it. These folks who say they want to jam with you undoubtedly know you are a beginner and are likely to adjust their expectations accordingly.

 

[tlc1976]

They know you’ve only been playing for 3 weeks, and it’s them who wants to jam with you? I say cool, go for it. Get some experience. Only having played for 3 weeks you’ve got nothing to prove.

 

[Snarf]

What kind of stuff should I be doing to get myself to be jam ready besides learning scales and learning to identify pitches by ear?

You need to develop a mentality of being extremely judgmental and critical of other musicians. Roll your eyes if someone makes a mistake or doesn't play something "cool" enough for your highly refined senses. Talk about people behind their back. Try to steal someone's gig. That kind of stuff.

/s

 

[pabs]

They know you’ve only been playing for 3 weeks, and it’s them who wants to jam with you? I say cool, go for it. Get some experience. Only having played for 3 weeks you’ve got nothing to prove.

Update on this, I took people's advice to figure out a couple songs to learn in advance before we jam and honestly they were way more straightforward than I expected. I think I was being too nervous lol