+1
Mike, I agree with your points.
I also think that for the guys who don't care for artificial relics, we need to acknowledge the humor and sincerity in calling Road Worn basses "Cloneworn," "totally cringeworthy," "Machine Worn," etc. I snickered, too.
The following are also sincere comments, but I wonder if they don't reveal deeper secret desires and hidden fear? I suspect that most people actually would love to have a bass that was a cool looking relic, and the idea that now just any "noob" can go buy one threatens the understandably sacred value of such an instrument to us.
This suggests how much many of us desire to have a relic. We all want to be cool--and aren't most of us are really just "posing as cool" when we play? The stars are totally posing--it's a show, often seen on TV--and that's where we all learned it when we were very young. It's now part of who we are. It's OK, we have no choice, it is our culture.
Below is my supporting evidence for "secret desires." I am not criticizing the posters of these comments. I sympathize and I am citing them because I think they reveal the intense desire by experienced bassists to have a relic, to be cool, and the fear of being derided if seen playing an artificially relic'd instrument. They also fear the self-criticism/guilt that might follow such a step.
...pretend[ing] that you're a bigtime bassist...
...for the most part, noobs who don't want to wait to earn their stripes...
...Poser heaven... ...reeks of poser...
...this whole idea of making new basses look like old ones...[is] desperately stupid...
...if someone is going to wear out my axe, it best be me or the players who had it before me - not some machine...
...I will chain them to the back of my car and make them all nice and road worn. You will look so cool!...
...I wouldn't [even] pay $1200 for a US made Fender, unless it was actually old...
...for those that like the look of a vintage instrument and can't be bothered to find one the "Road Worn" series may seem pretty cool...
...Relic basses remind me of cheap costume jewelry, trying to imitate the real thing...they look fake...
...falls in line with the instant gratification that so many want these days...
IMHO, these comments in part reveal a desire to have a relic, and a fear that if it is not totally genuine, they will be accused of--or even be guilty of cheating/posing/faking. This shows how sincere and serious many of us are about what we do. Yet, allow me to suggest that one would not be cheating by owning and playing an artificially relic'd bass.
Here is why: You probaby won't live long enough to sufficiently wear your bass into relic form anything like '60s nitro finished Fenders that lived through the hey-day of live bar music in America between 1965 and 1985.
It just can't happen. Those days of gigging 5 nights a week, week after week after week in sweaty smokey bars, are frankly gone. The National Minimum Drinking Age Act of 1984 required all states to raise their minimum purchase and public possession of alcohol age to 21. The lively bar scene, that had used live Rock as a draw, had gotten sick from disco, and then due to Federal Law, finally died. Since the drinking age is still no longer 18, and our culture now looks down on the kind of hedonism we thought was our due in 1968, things won't go back to that "golden era" for a long long time, if ever. Consider this: I was making the equivalent in 2008 US dollars of $2500 a week off the books in the early 70s as a bass player, starting age 21. Really.
Furthermore, even today's pros on the road who work many nights a year have several instruments, and these are mostly all finished in very durable poly-urethane, or are survivors of the "golden era."
So, if you have a nitro finish on your one main player, and if you are gigging 100+ nights a year, yes, you too will own a relic in about 10 years. Otherwise, you are buying somebody else's wear, and it might be made by man or machine.
It is OK. Things have changed. Relics celebrate a mythic period in American musical culture. That period now inspires and even sustains us. We should be glad to have had it and seek to hold on to its true musical and artistic glories. An artificial relic, made by hand or by machine is a tribute to that era, a lost youth that a few of us had, but most of us will have only in our imaginations. That imagining is not posing, it is a sacred state of allowing ourselves to be who we want to be as we create music.
The price issue will be settled by the marketplace.