frustrated- anyone else have this problem?

[majortoby]

Let start by saying this is my first post. Been lurking for a few years, decided to join. Recently, Ive had a rather frustrating problem. Ive owned a bass for about 2 years now, and have been actually on it for one year. Needless to say, I DO NOT sound good.:scowl: Well, as an added insult, my roommate is a KILLER guitarist, and even better piano player. We've finally reached a point where we can jam together, with a most audible weak point.:scowl: He's been wanting to record with me, which I definitely dig. However, this guy has more than a few bassist acquaintances. EVERY time someone who plays bass stops by, they proceed to rip out a rocking bass line, always in key, always timed well. As childish, or inane that may sound, It has really been frustrating as all heck to me. I have been working at this. I have been playing until it hurts waaay too much to be any good. So, I guess my question is this: How does a man learning an instrument (with a rather LATE (19) start) avoid becoming crippled by frustration when this happens? It honestly discourages me to no end. I'm not a weepy dude, or a problem-seeker, but this has been cramping my style, and psyching me right out of whatever futile "groove" I establish. :scowl:

 

[fdeck]

You just have to get over it, and take pride in your own progress for its own sake. The reason: There will always be people who are better than you are. I've been playing since 1977, and there are local players who are half my age and can run circles around me. I stopped worrying about it. I give myself my own goals, and keep trying to reach the next level, as my friends do the same.

One suggestion is to get a teacher if possible. The reason is that it is sometimes hard to form your own goals, but a teacher can help you with this.

 

[majortoby]

Alas, my friend, I give you my thanks, but with this problem: I can hardly afford food, and I already work 50+ hours weekly. A teacher is a financial burden I cannot yet handle.

 

[two fingers]

First of all, 19 isn't exactly a "late start". Second, have you ever thought of asking one of those awsome bass players for some tips? Take advantage of the fact that talent swings by on a regular basis. Third, your friend obviously isn't worried about your playing level (wants to record with you), so why should you be. Fourth (and most importantly) we ALL sucked at one point. And we ALL got better. Don't sweat it. It sounds like you have good friends and talented people around you all the time. Live and learn brother! Live and learn! And welcome to the forum!

 

[ggunn]

Let start by saying this is my first post. Been lurking for a few years, decided to join. Recently, Ive had a rather frustrating problem. Ive owned a bass for about 2 years now, and have been actually on it for one year. Needless to say, I DO NOT sound good.:scowl: Well, as an added insult, my roommate is a KILLER guitarist, and even better piano player. We've finally reached a point where we can jam together, with a most audible weak point.:scowl: He's been wanting to record with me, which I definitely dig. However, this guy has more than a few bassist acquaintances. EVERY time someone who plays bass stops by, they proceed to rip out a rocking bass line, always in key, always timed well. As childish, or inane that may sound, It has really been frustrating as all heck to me. I have been working at this. I have been playing until it hurts waaay too much to be any good. So, I guess my question is this: How does a man learning an instrument (with a rather LATE (19) start) avoid becoming crippled by frustration when this happens? It honestly discourages me to no end. I'm not a weepy dude, or a problem-seeker, but this has been cramping my style, and psyching me right out of whatever futile "groove" I establish. :scowl:

A late start at 19??? I got an early start at 53.

Don't worry about it; you gotta be bad before you can be good. Just get out there and be bad as much as you can in order to get it over with as soon as you can. As it is with most things, the only way past it is through it.

Oh, and don't play through pain. Pain is a message not to be ignored, and you could injure yourself. If it starts hurting, take a break; you're doing yourself more harm than good by continuing when you are in pain.

Another thing - if other bassists are intentionally flaunting their skills at you to get one up on you, remember how it makes you feel and don't do that to other up-and-comers when you get good.

 

[majortoby]

Thanks all, I guess 19 isn't late. But, I am surrounded by folks who started in single digits. I guess all this means is I should not be on my pc right now, lol. Seriously, though, thanks to everyone who replied. Very helpful.

 

[fdeck]

Alas, my friend, I give you my thanks, but with this problem: I can hardly afford food, and I already work 50+ hours weekly. A teacher is a financial burden I cannot yet handle.

Understood! Next best thing is all of the cool resources available online!

 

[ggunn]

Thanks all, I guess 19 isn't late. But, I am surrounded by folks who started in single digits. I guess all this means is I should not be on my pc right now, lol. Seriously, though, thanks to everyone who replied. Very helpful.

Our drummer sometimes brings his son Taylor to jams in my studio. The first time he came over he was 12, and he did surprisingly well for someone his age. I asked him, "Hey, Taylor, how long have you been playing drums?" He said, very seriously, "Nine years." I said, ""What were you doing for those other three years, you slacker?"

Seriously, music is a lifelong endeavor, and you are just getting started. You have eons of time in front of you. I envy you.

 

[Stumbo]

Ive owned a bass for about 2 years now, and have been actually on it for one year.

I already work 50+ hours weekly.

With your workin' 50 hours a week, how many total hours do you actually have into practicing for the last year?

Probably not that many.

Learning music is a process. Putting in 1 hour a day is usually more productive than putting in 7 hours on Sunday. If you practice every day, after 1 year, that's still only 365 hours. You could make some good progress that way but it's kinda like learning a foreign language: how many hours does it take to become fluent in, let's say, Spanish? Hundreds, probably thousands of hours of study, practice and speaking it with people already fluent in Spanish.

Once you have several hundred hours into practicing, then you can come back and complain. It also depends on what you're practicing. You might want to check out the links in my sig. below for some good TB bass info that may help you out.

Sure, there are natural musicians who pick stuff up w/o a problem but you can't compare yourself to anyone else. Just let it go. You won't be happy about anything if you always get down on yourself. Your talent is what it is. Your progress is what it is. There's no magic.

I mean, some of those guys stopping buy may have been into music since they were five years old and have studied/practiced/played in bands for thousands of hours. There's no way you can compete with them right now. Maybe if you keep up your practicing, one day you will. It will depend on how dedicated you are.

Btw, if you can barely afford food, IMO, bass playing is the least of your worries.

Good luck.

 

[P. Aaron]

At 48+, I am still learning the bass.

As a rock bassist, I am decent until I start playing along with something like Mama Kin by Aerosmith. Then one realizes that mixing skill, talent and groove takes even more effort.

Then I thought, I'll play along with some "Funk Hits" CDs I have. After a dozen or so run throughs, I still get my skill, any talent (I thought I had) and my ass handed back to me. Yet I persist. Why?

I love it.

If you love it, keep going. No other reason is necessary.

 

[Godbody]

At 48+, I am still learning the bass.

As a rock bassist, I am decent until I start playing along with something like Mama Kin by Aerosmith. Then one realizes that mixing skill, talent and groove takes even more effort.

Then I thought, I'll play along with some "Funk Hits" CDs I have. After a dozen or so run throughs, I still get my skill, any talent (I thought I had) and my ass handed back to me. Yet I persist. Why?

I love it.

If you love it, keep going. No other reason is necessary.

I finally bit the bullet and started learning funk, and it is painful. It makes me wanna run back home to all the garage rock I know and love.

OP, I got my first bass ten years ago, played it a little all the way, and have been serious about it for two years now. I try to put in ten hours of practice time by myself every week. That's about 1000 hours of serious playing time. I've heard it said (wish I could recall where) that to reach 'true genius' levels of ability at anything creative, it seems to take about 50,000 hours of practice. So I'm not exactly on the fast track to be truly great before I die a presumably horrific death. How good do you really need to be?? We're on a forum with a Mediocre Bassist Club! Tons of those guys have paying gigs!

All those flashy players may be lacking in substance. At the risk of sounding patronizing, as your ear for music develops you may start to realize that often the fundamentals of more 'impressive' players aren't all that solid. Maybe your friend realizes this (he probably does, since it sounds like he's musically accomplished). Maybe he wants to see you develop into a bass player he can actually use.

Just keep putting in the practice you can. It sounds like you've got a pretty stressful situation and financial situation; music is a great way to escape for a few hours at a time. And the more you play with other musicians, the faster you'll develop. Take every opportunity to jam.

Anyway, everything I said may be utter bullcrap. I'm bored at work and extremely hung over. Hope this was moderately inspirational.

 

[snappytom]

I finally bit the bullet and started learning funk, and it is painful. It makes me wanna run back home to all the garage rock I know and love.

Very true ..... studying some funk and motown for a while really helped my groove and timing.

48 and still learning .....

 

[majortoby]

Just thought I'd follow up...problem over. OP is pretty much irrelevant now. Thanks all for the replies, kind words and such. In fact, I'd been so busy with the J that I haven't even gotten onto TB in ages. I guess what I learned is that, if I cannot accept my own weaknesses, and learn from them, I cannot ever expect to improve. So yeah, 5 months later, and a whole new perspective on the matter. Besides, my work schedule shifted drastically, allowing me many more hours on bass I also realized the value of living with a musician more skilled than yourself. Seriously, I look back on the past 14 months of jam sessions we've had, and I feel like I owe him a few thousand dollars Too bad I need that money for gear.

 

[Sparks55]

Sounds like you are making great spiritual progress, which really is important. I've been mixing live sound for bands for 28 years. Heard a lot of good players and a sh&*load of bad. I've heard many other sounds guys who are real good players but think they suck. It took me this long to realize that they are just screwing themselves. I picked up my first bass last Christmas and auditioned in Feb for a 70s/blues cover band already gigging. I got the gig. i know i am a beginner and that I suck. There are a lot of musicians, no, players in the audience every week that can whip my butt on the bass. But you know what? I am the one up there doing it and having a blast and they are paying a cover to drink and criticize me! Sorry for the rant. Just get out there and play. You can only get better by pushing yourself with better musicians. You don't have to think you are "good enough." Let the band you are playing with decide that. Welcome the opportunity and come prepared. If you are like me and need to have a list of tunes in advance due to a minimal repertoire, then don't hesitate to tell them. Get the list/CDs and then practice your butt off. You'll soon realize that you just have to get out of your own way.

hope this helps! Peace.

Mark

 

[nutso42]

Just thought I'd follow up...problem over. OP is pretty much irrelevant now. Thanks all for the replies, kind words and such. In fact, I'd been so busy with the J that I haven't even gotten onto TB in ages. I guess what I learned is that, if I cannot accept my own weaknesses, and learn from them, I cannot ever expect to improve. So yeah, 5 months later, and a whole new perspective on the matter. Besides, my work schedule shifted drastically, allowing me many more hours on bass I also realized the value of living with a musician more skilled than yourself. Seriously, I look back on the past 14 months of jam sessions we've had, and I feel like I owe him a few thousand dollars Too bad I need that money for gear.

I know how you feel. Six months ago I was the worst player in the world, but after a lot of practice and dedication I improved greatly. Now, of course, I no longer practice because I spend so much time on TB.