Get off my LAWN! "Grumpy Old Farts"

[GonePlaid]

Yep, you just gave me one @GonePlaid ! The post office gets paid by the sender to deliver junk mail. They should charge the sender for the return if it is not wanted by the recipient...makes sense but that is probably why it is not done.

I do like your prepaid return envelope policy...

That's what's happened. The senders stopped paying for the returns. The last ones I attempted to RTS were returned to me for additional postage. Nope. Recycle bin.

 

[mikeoso]

I still prefer to all my bill paying via mail-or phone-and I get lotsa junk mail. It goes to the recycle bin after opening. If it has a prepaid return envelope, I put everything in it(without signing anything)and send it back. Found out recently that USPS no longer does Return To Sender w/o return postage. Too bad. I used to do it that way.
I trust that you'll have no problem finding other grump worthy subjects.

I often recycle junk mail unopened. Last year I got an envelope from a nationally known investment firm. I have no investments and nothing that could be invested, and I nearly chucked it. But, I decided to see what they were peddling.

Turned out to be a check to the rescue's endowment fund, in the amount of $100,000. Very generous donor.

 

[GonePlaid]

I often recycle junk mail unopened. Last year I got an envelope from a nationally known investment firm. I have no investments and nothing that could be invested, and I nearly chucked it. But, I decided to see what they were peddling.

Turned out to be a check to the rescue's endowment fund, in the amount of $100,000. Very generous donor.

Not that I'm getting any donations, but I open almost everything. Particularly, the[stuff]from Nigeria-or wherever-that says I've won _______. Even[stuff]from the other political party(notice I'm not specifying which is the 'other'), just in case it has a paid return envelope. I even do them the courtesy of telling them"wrong team"in an effort to save my carrier at least some crap he/she won't hafta deliver.

 

[Chubby Fingers]

When i lived in Aberdeen, Scotland, my street address was XX Something Drive.

I was always getting pestered by glass companies wanting to sell me a conservatory (a glass extension on the back of one's house).

So one day I finally gave in and said "sure, come round and give me an estimate".

Since he didnt ask, I didn't tell the guy XX Something Drive was a second floor apartment...

 

[GonePlaid]

When i lived in Aberdeen, Scotland, my street address was XX Something Drive.

I was always getting pestered by glass companies wanting to sell me a conservatory (a glass extension on the back of one's house).

So one day I finally gave in and said "sure, come round and give me an estimate".

Since he didnt ask, I didn't tell the guy XX Something Drive was a second floor apartment...

Good one!

 

[beans-on-toast]

They don't deliver flyers where I live, just sometimes junk mail addressed to occupant. I like the weekly flyers from hardware stores, that sort of thing. They make good bathroom reading. Occasionally I bump into a guy delivering them and ask for an adbag. They usually look at me like I'm nuts.

 

[GwenOnBass]

They don't deliver flyers where I live, just sometimes junk mail addressed to occupant. I like the weekly flyers from hardware stores, that sort of thing. They make good bathroom reading. Occasionally I bump into a guy delivering them and ask for an adbag. They usually look at me like I'm nuts.

People with a good backlog of "reading material" got on well in the first months of lockdown.

 

[GonePlaid]

People with a good backlog of "reading material" got on well in the first months of lockdown.

I have a bunch of 'coffee table' books on trains that I can lose myself in for days on end. I don't, however, have a coffee table. I do have a "reading room"-smallest room in the house.

 

[beans-on-toast]

I wonder how dailies deal with covid. An 88 year old friend dons a mask and gloves each page gets spritzed with alcohol.

 

[SoulReflection]

I wonder how dailies deal with covid. An 88 year old friend dons a mask and gloves each page gets spritzed with alcohol.

Hope the ink doesn't bleed...

 

[GwenOnBass]

There are some stories printed that need spritzed with alcohol.

 

[Jeff Scott]

There aren't many good points about the virus but, door knockers are staying away..

Yep. When's the last the Jehovah Witnesses showed up at your door?

I wonder how dailies deal with covid. An 88 year old friend dons a mask and gloves each page gets spritzed with alcohol.

Don, mask, and gloves all in the same sentence? That can mean only one thing!

 

[Charlie Tango]

Yep, you just gave me one @GonePlaid ! The post office gets paid by the sender to deliver junk mail. They should charge the sender for the return if it is not wanted by the recipient...makes sense but that is probably why it is not done.

I do like your prepaid return envelope policy...

You can use take a prepaid return envelope, put a label over the "To:" address (normally the outfit that would pay for the return mail) and send a letter to your sister,

Yep. When's the last the Jehovah Witnesses showed up at your door?
Don, mask, and gloves all in the same sentence? That can mean only one thing!

View attachment 3928242

Don Diego de la Vega! El Zorro!

 

[SoulReflection]

Yep. When's the last the Jehovah Witnesses showed up at your door?

Many moons ago...

 

[Polish Thunder]

If you like to mess with telemarketers, Tom Mabe has a recorder on his phone and would mess with telemarketers. One of my favorites of his...

 

[SoulReflection]

You can use take a prepaid return envelope, put a label over the "To:" address (normally the outfit that would pay for the return mail) and send a letter to your sister,

?

 

[GwenOnBass]

In the primitive days of ink and paper, and hearth and ledger, Robert Shea and Robert Anton Wilson suggest in The Illuminatus! Trilogy using the Memo: field of cheques to write "for sexual favours" (e.g. utility bills).

 

[Chubby Fingers]

Yep. When's the last the Jehovah Witnesses showed up at your door?
Don, mask, and gloves all in the same sentence? That can mean only one thing!

Ah. I have a treat for the Jehovas.

Our house has a courtyard at the front with walls on all sides. Access is through a steel gage with a little gatehouse over it. Yes really.

I'm using the lockdown time to build a portcullis and to cut some murder holes over the gate. Nothing too unpleasant like boiling oil or arrows but a couple of buckets of well rotted liquid cowsh#t should do the trick...

 

[mikeoso]

They bothered me for awhile. I answered the door mostly sans garments and invited them in for a beer. They stopped bothering me.

 

[GwenOnBass]