• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join free Log in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

Ghost builds?

Nobody

Nobody

Inactive
Jul 14, 2004
2,144
4,005
gravel
#1
I recently read(skimmed through) a thread about top highly skilled artists having instruments custom built to look like the one they are known for but with better quality, features, craftsmanship, and yada yada yada than they can get from a major manufacturer. I'm not sure if this is true or not nor do I care. The concept does give me an idea for a possible solution for a problem I've been having for years though. I have not been able to find a bass that is equal to my skill level. Perhaps I should try one of these custom shops and see if they can do it. I mean.... I have literally tried them all.... SX.... Rogue.... Ibanez GIO..... First Act..... Starcaster by Fendre...... Wishbass..... I cannot find a bass that is not too good for my skill level! What does a person have to do to get a bass bad enough around here? Before you ask... Yes, I have tried to do a poor set-up and the cheapest strings I could find. I've sanded down the fretboard edges so the frets stick out more but it's still not enough. I've removed the string height adjustment screws so the saddles sit directly on the bridge plate and it is still too good for me. The truss rod is as tight as I can get it without stripping it out. The strings fret out on every single note no matter where I play but I still feel that the instruments far exceed my musical ability. What do you all think? Should I keep trying decent instruments and try to get them to suck as bad as I do or should I get a custom built? What suggestions do you have to make a bass worse? What kind of features should I ask for if I decide to go custom?
Thanks for the help everyone.
 
  • Like
Reactions: rogerbmiller, mj_, Old Garage-Bander and 2 others
#2
You need a time machine to travel back to the 1970s to find some really impressive cheap instruments!
Many of those will be equal or below your level.

(Un)fortunately, most have been burned or carefully fitted to appropriately sized landfills many years ago, so without time travel they are hard to recreate.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Nobody
#3
Soak you bass for 96 hours in a solution of 50% mineral oil, 25% rendered lard, and 25% real butter.

Prepare the mixture in a vessel large enough to completely submerge the bass (an old bathtub works well for this), then heat the mixture until all the semi viscous components are throughly melted, then stir to throughly combine.

Once you vat is prepared, dunk your bass and completely submerge it. Since your bass is most likely constructed of wood, a couple of concrete blocks to hold it down may be in order.

*DISCLAIMER* by mentioning you bass may be made of wood should in no way be construed as an endorsement, official or personal, for the use of wood as the best choice of material to be used in the construction of electric bass guitars. There are many alternative materials which would render a decidedly inferior instrument, but that is not to imply these materials cannot be used in the construction of electric bass guitars, that the vast majority are made of wood serves as it's own endorsement for the obvious superiority of wood as the best material for bass.

Once your bass has soaked for 96 hours, remove it and hang it up over the vat so any excess solution drains back into the vat. Allow to dry for one week, or 168 hours, whichever comes first. Wipe everything down with rags saturated in denatured alcohol to remove any remaining excess dip and you now have a bass that is slicker than snot on a doorknob, fatter sounding than a big boar hog, and plays like butter.

Oh wait...you wanted your bass to suck more...never mind.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: McG, mj_ and Nobody
#5
Slimer can make what you desire.
Give him a call.




tumblr_mcsibsL5N01r84s9so1_500.gif
 
  • Like
Reactions: Old Garage-Bander and Nobody
#7
Nobody said:
I recently read(skimmed through) a thread about top highly skilled artists having instruments custom built to look like the one they are known for but with better quality, features, craftsmanship, and yada yada yada than they can get from a major manufacturer. I'm not sure if this is true or not nor do I care. The concept does give me an idea for a possible solution for a problem I've been having for years though. I have not been able to find a bass that is equal to my skill level. Perhaps I should try one of these custom shops and see if they can do it. I mean.... I have literally tried them all.... SX.... Rogue.... Ibanez GIO..... First Act..... Starcaster by Fendre...... Wishbass..... I cannot find a bass that is not too good for my skill level! What does a person have to do to get a bass bad enough around here? Before you ask... Yes, I have tried to do a poor set-up and the cheapest strings I could find. I've sanded down the fretboard edges so the frets stick out more but it's still not enough. I've removed the string height adjustment screws so the saddles sit directly on the bridge plate and it is still too good for me. The truss rod is as tight as I can get it without stripping it out. The strings fret out on every single note no matter where I play but I still feel that the instruments far exceed my musical ability. What do you all think? Should I keep trying decent instruments and try to get them to suck as bad as I do or should I get a custom built? What suggestions do you have to make a bass worse? What kind of features should I ask for if I decide to go custom?
Thanks for the help everyone.
Click to expand...
Assuming you have strings with the round ferrules at the end...
1. Remove the strings.
2. Put masking tape on the body along the bottom of the bridge.
3. Mark the location of the string ferrules on the tape.
4. Remove the bridge. DO NOT FILL THE SCREW HOLES!
5. Break a #2 yellow pencil in half. Save it for later.
6. Put nails thru the ferrules and hammer them into the bass on the marks you made.
7. Load the strings into the tuners and tighten but not too tight.
8. Get a one inch diameter plastic Rx bottle.
9. Cut the bottle in half lengthwise.
10. Place the half bottle, round side up, under the strings at about the proper scale length for your bass.
11. Tighten strings to tune.
12. Adjust the angle and position of the pill bottle for best intonation.
13. Leave the masking tape on. This, along with the bridge holes are as close to mojo as you're going to get.
14. Get the broken pencil that you previously put aside.
15. Ask yourself, "What the eff... why did I break the pencil?
16. Once you are over questioning the pencil thing, you will be in the right frame of mind to start playing.
17. Enjoy having a great excuse for crappy play.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Nobody and S-Bigbottom
#9
I've always heard rumors of these things like how Slash from GNR's Gibson isn't actually a Gibson. It seems interesting and if there ever had to be a conspiracy theory in the world of instrument it seems like this would be the ultimate one. Until we find that Leo Fender was actually a shape shifting reptilian that controlled what music we listened to. Then it would be topped.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Nobody
#10
I've always had the dream of getting paid to do a Pete Townsend. Please send me a bass with cash (you pay shipping), and I shall have my wish. I can send it back when I'm done for you for testing (you pay shipping).

Ok? Ok.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Nobody
#18
Old Garage-Bander said:
And how many of us got rid of an old crappy bass only to find that decades later it's worth some good coin?
My hand is raised.
Click to expand...

Man, don't I know it. I couldn't get rid of my very first bass, a '73 Olympic white Precision, that I paid $200 for in early '77. I learned on that bass but it had, literally, one tone. The tone knob did very little, if anything. I traded it to a local music store for a used Travis Bean (aluminum neck). If I had kept it I could sell it now and buy a sweet used Sadowsky or Roscoe. Damn. Who knew?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Nobody

Latest posts

Top Bottom
Back