Have you ever played a song for a girl/guy?

[murph7489]

As someone who was a young girl long ago

So I always liked math and I like the study of the psychology of music and its effects on the human..I came up with a formula based on the theory that playing in a band makes you younger than your actual age...

X = your actual age
y = the age adjustment due to being a musician...

X / y = 30 in your case LBS...the math is solid...Happy holidays !

 

[murph7489]

back to the original OP...my advice based on my experience and this is just for me...DONT...lol

I had a girlfriend that loved Susan Tedeschi...So I practiced a song of hers for like a month..(on guitar n singing) I went to an open mic and set up a video camera to record it and send it to her...she was in another state working a nuke plant job at the time...Anyway I did it, thought I did pretty well..(I'm no Susan or even close) I sent it to her...I waited and waited and waited for a response...none came.. then after a couple of weeks I couldn't take it anymore and asked her if she watched it...and what she thought...her answer...you can't sing..lol

I know I can't sing and I never thought i could but even with that knowledge her saying that to me made me feel like a fool...She was right, but it almost hurt my feelings..and honestly I wish I had never done it..

 

[james condino]

That's the whole point of playing music, to be able to go outside of your comfort zone for a girl you are into. If the two of you cannot laugh at that, run.....

From an old friend who divorced three times:

"Far better to find out early on than to hold it inside only to find out five years later that you made the wrong decision."

 

[Outbush]

On the weekend I jumped another dude’s game; congratulated the entertainer on his first set on my way to man the BBQ and I said I was sorry not to have a bass with me. Well he invited me to join him (small town, good pr, bit risky) so I whipped around home and grabbed the bass. He left that backing track on for a couple of numbers but then pulled the bass out of the mix and away we went - then we had ‘Em dancing.

18 months ago my wife was diagnosed with a serious and aggressive cancer and there we were, Saturday night, she was bopping round with a few others whilst we made sure the music kept swinging on. Backing tracks are great, but they don’t do it like us bass players.

 

[Sazazie_Spring]

The girl i’m currently seeing is the only one i share my lyrics with, she’s the litmus test. I’ve also made it very clear that i normally wouldn’t send any lyrics to anyone, so for her to be in the clear is something.

 

[ElectroVibe]

Here is the best idea. Have all the lights suddenly go dark and start THIS song playing immediately.
Not creepy at all.
Not creepy at all.
Not creepy at all.

Turn Around, Look At Me - YouTube

 

[lark_z]

When you talk to her, try to repeat back the last phrase out of her mouth when you respond.

She - "I went to the store today"
You - "You went to the store?"
NOT - "Really, I went bowling".

The first is leading and encourages her to keep talking and you seem like a great conversationalist. The second, you're not really listening and like talking about yourself too much.

Wish I'd learned this 50 years ago. Wow. Lots of missed opportunities, LOL.

 

[cheapbasslovin]

Thread tl;dr

I've done it once with a song I wrote, but it was at my wedding and the girl was pretty much nailed down in the relationship at that point.

Doing it to kick off a relationship seems like it could go either way, as the line between 'romantic' and 'weird' or even 'creepy' is thin and guys are famously not always the best judge of where it is.

If you do it, make clear your intention and give her the space to say she's not into it and walk away.

 

[JRA]

have any of you guys/gals ever played a song for someone you like?

not exactly. i wrote a couple of corny breakup tunes that were played on the radio. at the time: i hoped she was sorry that she dumped me. at the moment of this writing: i'm thinking = she might have been...but probably wasn't.

per the OP: i've written tunes for people that i love. but i haven't written tunes for chicks that i wanted to love me back. good luck with your romantic venture! (Gee is probably a good key! )

 

[Billy Bob Bass]

Oh, I think that's a wonderful and very romantic thing to do. Sometimes words are not enough or too much...

Some tips:

 

[bolophonic]

I tried this a couple of times in the 80’s and it never worked out like the movies.

 

[39-Bassist]

Well I actually just made a tape of songs that were what I wanted to say...It worked but it was kind of sappy.
Looking back I would NOT do that again, I would just come right out and say how I feel. Then see where it goes from there.
Some song ex:
Foreigner - Waiting for a girl like you
Rhett Forrester - See you in my dreams
Todd Rundgren - Hello its me

Ugh, that really was sappy now that I remember them.

 

[arbitrary]

I've done this many a times (songs I've written). But only after we had already confessed our undying love for each other bwahahahhahahaha.

I'm in the process of doing this for my kids atm.

 

[CryingBass]

 

[FrenchBassQC]

hehe...

View attachment 4073346

And you're wondering why it never worked?

 

[TonyP-]

I did and only for my wife...
I call it
Big Bad Burrito
It means a lot to us

 

[JW56789]

Let's see, most of the redneck joints I played, you really didn't see a lot of 'guy/girls' . . . . . maybe 'Lola' or 'Sweet Jane' coulda got added to the set lists. I'd have loved to play some quote 'gay bars' unquote, but never worked out, I'm sure it would have been a lot more fun.

 

[bholder]

And you're wondering why it never worked?

In real life, I've been even worse... ...let's see, I think my biggest dating "whoopsie" was choosing "Apocalypse Now" for a first date with someone I was really, really interested in? We were both shellshocked for a week... ...or maybe, 20 years later, singing Pink Floyd's "Mother" for another candidate (great song, but.... "Mother, will she break my heart?" Ah-yup...)

 

[Jeff Hughes]

I guess if your goal is to communicate to her that you are willing to work hard on this performance because it is for her, then she might get that. Or she might not like music that much. I think musicians sometimes inflate how the general public feels about and responds to music.

I support the direct route. Just tell her you have feelings for her. If she says she doesn't have feelings for you, then call it a day. If you try to make her like you and are successful, it will probably only be temporary.

Being direct might say more to her than playing a song.

Funny story: my BL got asked to play a gig where a guy who was about to propose wanted my BL to play a song as she entered a backyard party right before he proposed. He even asked my BL to stand a certain way. Of course I think proposing in front of lots of people is fraught with potential hazards.

 

[knumbskull]