HELP, I'M A FACEBOOK VIRGIN!!

[HubbardsFate]

Hello Gang,

Well, the title says it all. Facebook has existed since what - 2006? - and I have never been a member. But I'm thinking I might be soon.

The catalyst for this is that I want to relocate to an area about four hours west of where I currently live. But I have no family/friends/real connections there. And let's face it: in human history, there has never been a networking tool like Facebook/various other social media platforms. And I'd like to start networking before making the move.

I may need it in order to help find rental accommodations. I'm in Canada, so there's Kijiji, but I'm pretty sure Facebook Marketplace has double, even triple, the amount of listings, for anything/everything a person might be looking for: rentals, basses, vehicles, etc.

I'm also hoping to have employment lined up before making the move, and while as I understand it, Facebook Marketplace no longer has an employment section, many companies nowadays have their own Facebook pages that I am assuming they post job opportunities on...so, there's that.

What I DON'T want/need is to (A) be posting my day-to-day activities, and/or a zillion photos, nor (B) have dozens, if not hundreds, of people from my past trying to 'friend' me.

On that latter point: there are definitely SOME family members, friends, and acquaintances that I'd be okay with having as contacts on there. My concern is that I'd show up on those peoples' friends lists, and then people that we mutually know (whom I DON'T want to be in contact with) will be like "HEY, he's finally on Facebook, I'll 'friend' him!" - And then I'm in the awkward position of ignoring/rejecting their request.

I know next to nothing about using the platform, how much a guy can 'tweak' settings to his liking/stay as private as possible, etc. Anyone want to help out a Facebook virgin here?

 

[Winslow]

There is absolutely nothing about f'book that is geared toward "privacy." It is an eavesdropping, data-mining/collating/reselling, and advertising platform, pure and simple. If privacy is something you value, that site is something to avoid, full stop. Go over to Ars Technica, and read up on f'book's practices, just for starters.

People will says, "Yeah, but..." and make all manner of excuses for using it, but none of that changes the nature of what kind of platform it is. Know that before you go in.

Good luck with the move, in any case.

 

[jmattbassplaya]

I’m not Canadian but a US citizen, so my advice is likely skewed… For jobs and networking, use LinkedIn and Indeed. Once you find what you’re looking for, I recommend applying directly on the company website.

For connecting with the local community or learning about rentals, restaurants, etc. use Google, Zillow, and Yelp.

I’ll be very honest and say I am not a social media fan, and Talkbass/YouTube are the closest I’ll get to it. One of the best things I ever did was delete my Facebook. I found it to be a complete time suck that preyed on people’s emotions (typically negative) to drive engagement and to keep your eyes scrolling. As someone who was on the OG iteration of FB when you had to be invited to the platform and have a college email address, it is not the same thing it once was. If you’ve made it this long without being on the platform I’d say you dodged a bullet and to keep on without it. You’re not missing anything. You’re just as likely to reconnect with old friends via LinkedIn, and at least that platform disincentivizes folks from airing their dirty laundry or garbage opinions.

 

[FrenchBassQC]

Run don’t go there, since the implementation of bill C-18, Facebook (Meta) has blocked all Canadian news content on their sites. For solidarity with the news media’s, I have canceled my subscription plus for the reasons that have been mentioned above.

 

[bassdude51]

So far, I've never joined FaceBook. Don't need it, don't want it.

There's probably 100s of YouTube videos on how to use FaceBook and Google can probably help also.

If you join, you can always get out of it too.

 

[LP Custom]

Never thought I’d recommend this, but…

Abstinence.

 

[Winslow]

Never thought I’d recommend this, but…

Abstinence.

Well played.

And in keeping with the OP's original analogy, f'book is about as "private" as a hooker is "chaste" and/or "drug & disease free."

 

[MonetBass]

You can lock FB down so that only your friends can see your posts.

Will that keep FB from using your content at their whim? Of course not. That's well-documented in the end user agreement when you sign up, despite what some FB users believe.

 

[smatanovic]

Hello Gang,

Well, the title says it all. Facebook has existed since what - 2006? - and I have never been a member. But I'm thinking I might be soon.

The catalyst for this is that I want to relocate to an area about four hours west of where I currently live. But I have no family/friends/real connections there. And let's face it: in human history, there has never been a networking tool like Facebook/various other social media platforms. And I'd like to start networking before making the move.

I may need it in order to help find rental accommodations. I'm in Canada, so there's Kijiji, but I'm pretty sure Facebook Marketplace has double, even triple, the amount of listings, for anything/everything a person might be looking for: rentals, basses, vehicles, etc.

I'm also hoping to have employment lined up before making the move, and while as I understand it, Facebook Marketplace no longer has an employment section, many companies nowadays have their own Facebook pages that I am assuming they post job opportunities on...so, there's that.

What I DON'T want/need is to (A) be posting my day-to-day activities, and/or a zillion photos, nor (B) have dozens, if not hundreds, of people from my past trying to 'friend' me.

On that latter point: there are definitely SOME family members, friends, and acquaintances that I'd be okay with having as contacts on there. My concern is that I'd show up on those peoples' friends lists, and then people that we mutually know (whom I DON'T want to be in contact with) will be like "HEY, he's finally on Facebook, I'll 'friend' him!" - And then I'm in the awkward position of ignoring/rejecting their request.

I know next to nothing about using the platform, how much a guy can 'tweak' settings to his liking/stay as private as possible, etc. Anyone want to help out a Facebook virgin here?

Do yourself a favor and avoid it. At all costs. It's a toxic, attention-driven, privacy-violating dumpster fire of a company.

 

[BigBigGuy44]

Use LinkedIn for employment opportunities. You can also browse a lot of businesses on Facebook without having a Facebook account.

Facebook is a terrible place to be. If you local area has a Nextdoor site, stay away from it too. It's Facebook for people whose children will not let them use Facebook.

 

[Hurricane Jimmie]

So Anyway, I've been on FB for a number of years and recently stopped checking in. I just needed a break until after our election cycle is complete.
My band posts our upcoming gigs on FB.

If the OP is worried about turning down Friend Requests, don't worry. Very few pay attention or care.

 

[Gorilla Monsoon]

Hello Gang,

Well, the title says it all. Facebook has existed since what - 2006? - and I have never been a member. But I'm thinking I might be soon.

The catalyst for this is that I want to relocate to an area about four hours west of where I currently live. But I have no family/friends/real connections there. And let's face it: in human history, there has never been a networking tool like Facebook/various other social media platforms. And I'd like to start networking before making the move.

I may need it in order to help find rental accommodations. I'm in Canada, so there's Kijiji, but I'm pretty sure Facebook Marketplace has double, even triple, the amount of listings, for anything/everything a person might be looking for: rentals, basses, vehicles, etc.

I'm also hoping to have employment lined up before making the move, and while as I understand it, Facebook Marketplace no longer has an employment section, many companies nowadays have their own Facebook pages that I am assuming they post job opportunities on...so, there's that.

What I DON'T want/need is to (A) be posting my day-to-day activities, and/or a zillion photos, nor (B) have dozens, if not hundreds, of people from my past trying to 'friend' me.

On that latter point: there are definitely SOME family members, friends, and acquaintances that I'd be okay with having as contacts on there. My concern is that I'd show up on those peoples' friends lists, and then people that we mutually know (whom I DON'T want to be in contact with) will be like "HEY, he's finally on Facebook, I'll 'friend' him!" - And then I'm in the awkward position of ignoring/rejecting their request.

I know next to nothing about using the platform, how much a guy can 'tweak' settings to his liking/stay as private as possible, etc. Anyone want to help out a Facebook virgin here?

Br prepared for some shockingly inappropriate invasions of privacy. Regardless of what you THINK you are doing when you disable tracking, you are still 100% being tracked. I joined to communicate with the gentleman who made one of my basses, and later that day, went to the pizza joint down the street, where i got 11 invitations from people id seen at that location. One was sitting right next to me at the bar. I showed it to him, we both shook our heads in amazement and disgust. He clearly had no knowledge of my 4 hour association with facebook.

 

[LowendG]

how much a guy can 'tweak' settings to stay as private as possible

You can't. I dumped FB four years ago and never looked back.

 

[Thumpin6string]

IMHO, find something else. I, like you, thought I'd join so I could use marketplace. So, I signed up and was banned 24 hours later with no explanation. When I tried to find out why, I was ignored. So, as far as I'm concerned, f*ck Facebook.

 

[Topkat13]

I've been one since FB started and it ain't about to change.

 

[Bunk McNulty]

Hello Gang,

Well, the title says it all. Facebook has existed since what - 2006? - and I have never been a member. But I'm thinking I might be soon.

The catalyst for this is that I want to relocate to an area about four hours west of where I currently live. But I have no family/friends/real connections there. And let's face it: in human history, there has never been a networking tool like Facebook/various other social media platforms. And I'd like to start networking before making the move.

I may need it in order to help find rental accommodations. I'm in Canada, so there's Kijiji, but I'm pretty sure Facebook Marketplace has double, even triple, the amount of listings, for anything/everything a person might be looking for: rentals, basses, vehicles, etc.

I'm also hoping to have employment lined up before making the move, and while as I understand it, Facebook Marketplace no longer has an employment section, many companies nowadays have their own Facebook pages that I am assuming they post job opportunities on...so, there's that.

What I DON'T want/need is to (A) be posting my day-to-day activities, and/or a zillion photos, nor (B) have dozens, if not hundreds, of people from my past trying to 'friend' me.

On that latter point: there are definitely SOME family members, friends, and acquaintances that I'd be okay with having as contacts on there. My concern is that I'd show up on those peoples' friends lists, and then people that we mutually know (whom I DON'T want to be in contact with) will be like "HEY, he's finally on Facebook, I'll 'friend' him!" - And then I'm in the awkward position of ignoring/rejecting their request.

I know next to nothing about using the platform, how much a guy can 'tweak' settings to his liking/stay as private as possible, etc. Anyone want to help out a Facebook virgin here?

"Ollie showed me the fork in the road.
You can take to the left or go straight to the right,
Use your days and save your nights,
Be careful where you step, and watch whatcha eat,
Sleep with the light on and you got it beat."

 

[Engle]

Wow, lot's of hate for Facebook here!
How I use it:
I see pictures and get updates on friends relatives that don't live near me.
I have access to FB Marketplace. (Craigslist is nearly useless). If somebody has brand new profile and no history, I won't deal with them.
I'm a member of about 5 groups. I quit groups that make me angry and have learned to not argue with random strangers on the internet.
I post my gigs, but not much else.
I block people whose posts are a waste of time for me.
I don't ever "check in" at any location.
I use the facebook app on my phone. On PCs, I use browsers that block tracking. This also works to stop other sites from bombarding me with ads.

 

[monsterthompson]

I’ve had mixed results with FB over the years. I’m currently checking in occasionally but not going there for any real purpose. I’ve been considering the marketplace as an option to get rid of a few things.

I’d expect that if the OP is using it to make new connections in a new location there could be some challenges. Being a new user with minimal history/activity might make people/groups less likely to engage.

My advice would be to find other alternatives if you can. It’s not useless but it’s not great and comes with a few annoyances.

 

[Dana R Gregory]

Facebook is nothing but a haven for scammers, fake news and false advertising. They constantly try to pump you for your personal information so they can sell it. The marketplace is useless as many who contact you are scammers who have hijacked a legitimate account. This happened to me. My account was hacked and was used by scammers in another state. I have since deleted it and really don't miss Facebook at all. I never posted any personal info and only visited a couple sites relative to my old profession. They don't check the validity of any ads and seem only interested in money they receive from them. There are plenty of ads claiming to be backed by Shark Tank, Dr Oz or some other celebrity which are all fake. There are also soft porn sites using clickbait to get you to sign in. Like others have said, run, don't walk from Facebook. There are other better alternatives.

 

[kmon]

Facebook is a cesspool of scams and manipulation. Zuckerberg is a genius. He somehow recruited billions of people to create content for him for free, and he’s able to mine that data so that he feeds back exactly what you want to see, digging the hooks in ever deeper.

That said, Mark’s solid gold Ferrari isn’t gonna pay for itself…go ahead and sign up. Maybe you’ll get some likes on that picture of what you had for breakfast.