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How can i quit?
- Thread starter jellejanssen
- Start date
Just tell them you quit. If they ask why, just tell them you are looking for a project with people who work together more as a team and who have a more respectful attititude towards one another. Then just walk out. The end.
You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
if it doesn't try this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnhhjGavEq8
for real though, just tell them you're out. good luck!
What makes you say that? It wasnt easy for me to quit a band that I was in.
I liked my bandmates, but wasnt feeling the music at all. I didnt want to let them down and leave them hanging, but the noise got unbearable.
agree. i've struggled when leaving bands/jobs before.it's hard advice to take but the best is still "just get it done".
It maybe has something to do with the fact that the answer to every band problem on TB (where the majority of members seem to be from the USA) is "quit" or "fire him/her".
To the OP.
If you do quit do it in a polite manner, you never know when you might bump into these people again. They may pass your name on to someone looking for a bass player in the future. If you leave on bad terms that is very unlikely.
If I ever have to quit I hope it's for good reason and I leave on good terms. I would give all the notice they need and help with finding a replacement.
Quitting when things have gone negative is another story. I am not sure how I would handle that.
blue
Quitting when things have gone negative is another story. I am not sure how I would handle that.
blue
It could be, but thats quite the broad brush to paint with. There are also a lot of UK bass players on the site and their responses are just as likely to read "quit" or "fire him/her". I dont think that has much to do with cultural differences in regards to quitting a band.
It doesn't sound like much of a band if the drummer and lead guitarist are being jerks.
You have every reason and right to leave. If they ask why, just tell them the truth, but try to be as non-confrontational about it as possible.
If I was being treated poorly in a band, quitting would be a no-brainer for me.
You have every reason and right to leave. If they ask why, just tell them the truth, but try to be as non-confrontational about it as possible.
If I was being treated poorly in a band, quitting would be a no-brainer for me.
Jelle, it really doesn't matter what you say. It only matters what you do...
In my (very) American view, you don't owe an explanation to anybody. Just get out - right now. And from now on, be more careful about the people to whom you commit...
MM
You are probably right, it just seems that way reading a lot of posts.
All the bands I have been in or known very few people have quit although I did fire a guy many years ago and we are still on good terms. He has since gone professional so it didn't do him any harm.
It does seem even harder for Europeans, though. I've been living back in Poland for seven years now. I've seen the "always claim to be busy or just don't answer when asked if you have time for gigs or rehearsals until they either fire you or just stop asking you and move on" method in action a few times, certainly more often than the "I quit" method.
Besides, the OP seems to be an extremely polite person, judging by his posts. Euro or not, saying "screw you guys I'm going home" is never gonna come easy to someone like that.
My first "real" band was exactly the opposite...loved the music & direction, but there were a couple of serious d_cks in that band & I couldn't stand being around them.
Fast forward to last year. Thought I was pretty much done with music (at least on a semi-pro level). Current situation is 5 guys who (as our spouses would say
) have "real" jobs, get along very well and the music is an enjoyable outlet that provides a nice supplemental cash flow (cover band so bookings are somewhat easier than trying to sell originals).It's all perspective. How hard it is to leave a band depends a great deal on the expectations you had going in vs. the reality and the personalities involved.
If it's not fun anymore, and your guitar player & drummer are talking $h!t on you, I think you already have your answer.
Yes, he does, but it all comes down to "do unto others..." If he's not being shown any respect, then there's no assumption that he owes them any. "Sorry guys, this just isn't a good fit anymore" gets the point across without lowering himself to their level.
My thoughts in life- sometimes we create problems for ourselves the exact "instant" we don't stand up for ourselves, and allow things to pile on top of each other when others don't do us right.
The correct response when they said "You aren't at our level." was an immediate and simple "F*** You"- I know this seems harsh and hasty and immature but it really is.
There are certain things, people don't say unless they really mean them and they should never say unless they mean them. But when they clearly say them you know right then where you stand.
Do they really think every band is composed of all players at exactly the same level and ability?? Dream on, every band I have been in has strength's and weaknesses. Solid players who practice/do their homework, and ALWAYS, always, always, at LEAST 1 player who does not do there homework.
You will be surprised at how much surrounding yourselves with civil/quality people will make your life better.
How do you quit- a simple, two words" either "I quit." or "F* you" you owe them NO EXPLANATION whatsoever.
Serious.
The correct response when they said "You aren't at our level." was an immediate and simple "F*** You"- I know this seems harsh and hasty and immature but it really is.
There are certain things, people don't say unless they really mean them and they should never say unless they mean them. But when they clearly say them you know right then where you stand.
Do they really think every band is composed of all players at exactly the same level and ability?? Dream on, every band I have been in has strength's and weaknesses. Solid players who practice/do their homework, and ALWAYS, always, always, at LEAST 1 player who does not do there homework.
You will be surprised at how much surrounding yourselves with civil/quality people will make your life better.
How do you quit- a simple, two words" either "I quit." or "F* you" you owe them NO EXPLANATION whatsoever.
Serious.
I've seen the complaints that every post on TB/BM is "quit" or "fire him" many times, but it's just not true. Sure, every thread will have those posts in them, but not all posts are "quit" or "fire." And I take a little umbrage when we're all lumped into one group and accused of saying that all the time. Every thread has thoughtful posts that try to help the OP, and sometimes that is to quit or fire someone. Even when someone does say "quit" or "fire" it's usually the right advice, like in this case. Just because someone says to quit or fire doesn't mean it's automatically knee-jerk and wrong.
I'll take a well-thought post advising someone to quit over a post complaining that that's all we do any day... the latter is utterly useless to the OP. And often the same person who complains about this non-existent "problem" will come around and still suggest the same thing! Only they'll try to phrase THEIR "quit" post in a way that makes themselves feel that they're not part of the pile-on LOL...
I don't think anyone likes to quit but sometimes it must be done. I've done it, and in different ways depending on the situation. It's never easy, no matter where you live.
I'll take a well-thought post advising someone to quit over a post complaining that that's all we do any day... the latter is utterly useless to the OP. And often the same person who complains about this non-existent "problem" will come around and still suggest the same thing! Only they'll try to phrase THEIR "quit" post in a way that makes themselves feel that they're not part of the pile-on LOL...
I don't think anyone likes to quit but sometimes it must be done. I've done it, and in different ways depending on the situation. It's never easy, no matter where you live.
I'm going to take a slightly different view. I don't know how small the musician community in your area is, but things always seem to come back around again in my town. Everyone knows everyone. I support the notion of quitting, but give them ample notice to find a replacement, especially if there are pending gigs on the calendar. That speaks to your integrity as both a person and musician. If there is nothing booked then quit out right. But I would tell them why. If they get it, cool maybe they will adjust their approach to band mates. If they don't at least you were honest and open about the situation.
