How do yall deal with hate?

Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Tommygunn, Jul 11, 2013.

  1. Tommygunn


    Nov 8, 2008
    Houston, Tx
    So basically there was a situation with another human being a while back... I screwed up and hurt their feelings. I was indeed rather inconsiderate, I will say. Since then I've sincerely apologized and offered to make it up to them, so long as I don't get sucked up into any drama. I don't like drama.

    Its been a couple of months and I'm still getting "hate mail". Every so often, a mutual friend (of mine and said person) will send me a message (via skype, text, or facebook) that pretty much says that I'm a worthless a-hole/scum of the earth.

    I was able to ignore the first couple, but its starting to get to me now. Some of these people, previously, I would have called 'good friends'. Kinda sucks. Since there no way I can go back in time to stop myself from doing what I did, how do I deal with the consequences?

    PS: I didn't kill anybody's dog or burn a house down. Its honestly not that big of a deal but I'm dealing with teenage girls so...

    Thanks guys
  2. People that send you hate mail after you've apologized and offered to make amends are not your friends. Real friends would have seen that you were sincere and would have forgiven you.
  3. Relic

    Relic Cow are you?

    Sep 12, 2006
    Robbinsville, NJ
    Move on. You screwed up and you apologized for it. If the other party(s) cannot let it go at this point then that is now their issue, not yours.
  4. Show them how "scummy" you are and do whatever was done worse.

    Maybe then they'll see what good labeling does.
  5. Phil Smith

    Phil Smith Mr Sumisu 2 U

    May 30, 2000
    Peoples Republic of Brooklyn
    Creator of: iGigBook for Android/iOS
    Reply to the hate mail by saying something nice.
  6. SeanO34


    Mar 19, 2013
    Scotland, UK
    To answer your question: how do you deal with hate?

    Answer, with the finger in between the index and third finger lol

    In all seriousness, it's been said before, if they were legitimate friends and worth having, they would let it be, you've apologised and tried being the bigger man. If there not mature enough to get on with there life's and let you get on with yours, there not worth it!
  7. Etienned


    Jul 16, 2010
    It's sometime hard to do, but to ignore someone is the best path for you, IMHO and IME.
    Think of it as fishing, if there's no bite for a while, the fisher moves to a new spot
  8. 1958Bassman


    Oct 20, 2007
    If the "mutual friend" wasn't the object of the original comments, they have no place saying anything about it. If they know you apologized and are still doing this, they need to grow up. Doing this publicly, via Facebook, is really unacceptable and they need to think about this- if they're unaware that their comments CAN'T be seen by THE WHOLE WORLD'S POPULATION, they need a clue. They also need to learn that you don't need them in your life. They aren't friends and may never have been. At best, they're acquaintances.

    Next message to this person, "I have apologized to xxxxxx and they accepted it. You need to let this go. It was never about you and, in fact, the World doesn't revolve around you.".

    BTW- this isn't 'hate', it's immaturity.
  9. hypapanuse

    hypapanuse Inactive

    Apr 2, 2013
    You are dealing with teenage girls. 'Nuff said, walk away.
  10. MJ5150

    MJ5150 Moderator Staff Member

    Apr 12, 2001
    Olympia, WA
    This would be my approach as well.

  11. lowendmafia

    lowendmafia Supporting Member

    Oct 11, 2007
    Boise, Idaho
    Stop caring about what other people think, seriously. Especially teenage girls. Block them on FB or whatever and get over it. Also, stop whining about it, whatever you did is done. If they can't move on, just shut them out. Generally people like that are not worth your time or energy.
  12. Relic

    Relic Cow are you?

    Sep 12, 2006
    Robbinsville, NJ
    I like this a lot and I've done so myself.
  13. 1958Bassman


    Oct 20, 2007
    Send her a fruit basket- that'll piss her off.:bag:
  14. There is no reasoning with teenage girls. They're evil. Pure. Evil.
  15. sloasdaylight

    sloasdaylight Inactive

    Feb 4, 2009
    Tampa, Florida, US
    How old are the participants involved?
  16. DWBass

    DWBass The Funkfather

    Hate is a strong word. There is definitely anger involved. Had that happen when I was younger. Baby momma drama! For about a year straight, I would get calls from random people calling me names and cussing me out then hanging up until I recognized a voice once. Turned out to be the sister of my best friend (he didn't know) who was close to baby momma!

    I'm kinda in a similar situation currently and I'm still harboring some anger for the individual involved. Not to the point that I need to send constant reminders to that person though. This person has attempted to smooth things over but I'm still pretty angry. I don't hate this person. Just dislike them and do not want to be within 50ft of them!
  17. icks


    Jul 12, 2001
    Sent back and email asking "Who the hell are you? Do we know each other? "
  18. Karenc


    Jul 7, 2013
    Have you considered praying about it?
    God can move mountains.
  19. Tommygunn


    Nov 8, 2008
    Houston, Tx

    Thanks for all the help and suggestions guys. Its been getting to me lately and I need to just ignore it I suppose.
  20. 1958Bassman


    Oct 20, 2007
    I would stop worrying about it. At that age, EVERYTHING is a crisis, nothing is taken in the way it was said and things said aren't always what were intended.

    If I had to define that age, I would say "Things were said, feelings were hurt, thinking wasn't usually involved". It's all about feelings and rationality is often avoided.