• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join free Log in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

How do yall deal with hate?

Tommygunn

Tommygunn

Nov 8, 2008
7,079
37
Houston, Tx
soundcloud.com
#1
So basically there was a situation with another human being a while back... I screwed up and hurt their feelings. I was indeed rather inconsiderate, I will say. Since then I've sincerely apologized and offered to make it up to them, so long as I don't get sucked up into any drama. I don't like drama.

Its been a couple of months and I'm still getting "hate mail". Every so often, a mutual friend (of mine and said person) will send me a message (via skype, text, or facebook) that pretty much says that I'm a worthless a-hole/scum of the earth.

I was able to ignore the first couple, but its starting to get to me now. Some of these people, previously, I would have called 'good friends'. Kinda sucks. Since there no way I can go back in time to stop myself from doing what I did, how do I deal with the consequences?

PS: I didn't kill anybody's dog or burn a house down. Its honestly not that big of a deal but I'm dealing with teenage girls so...

Thanks guys
 
#6
To answer your question: how do you deal with hate?

Answer, with the finger in between the index and third finger lol

In all seriousness, it's been said before, if they were legitimate friends and worth having, they would let it be, you've apologised and tried being the bigger man. If there not mature enough to get on with there life's and let you get on with yours, there not worth it!
 
#8
Tommygunn said:
So basically there was a situation with another human being a while back... I screwed up and hurt their feelings. I was indeed rather inconsiderate, I will say. Since then I've sincerely apologized and offered to make it up to them, so long as I don't get sucked up into any drama. I don't like drama.

Its been a couple of months and I'm still getting "hate mail". Every so often, a mutual friend (of mine and said person) will send me a message (via skype, text, or facebook) that pretty much says that I'm a worthless a-hole/scum of the earth.

I was able to ignore the first couple, but its starting to get to me now. Some of these people, previously, I would have called 'good friends'. Kinda sucks. Since there no way I can go back in time to stop myself from doing what I did, how do I deal with the consequences?

PS: I didn't kill anybody's dog or burn a house down. Its honestly not that big of a deal but I'm dealing with teenage girls so...

Thanks guys
Click to expand...

If the "mutual friend" wasn't the object of the original comments, they have no place saying anything about it. If they know you apologized and are still doing this, they need to grow up. Doing this publicly, via Facebook, is really unacceptable and they need to think about this- if they're unaware that their comments CAN'T be seen by THE WHOLE WORLD'S POPULATION, they need a clue. They also need to learn that you don't need them in your life. They aren't friends and may never have been. At best, they're acquaintances.

Next message to this person, "I have apologized to xxxxxx and they accepted it. You need to let this go. It was never about you and, in fact, the World doesn't revolve around you.".

BTW- this isn't 'hate', it's immaturity.
 
#11
Stop caring about what other people think, seriously. Especially teenage girls. Block them on FB or whatever and get over it. Also, stop whining about it, whatever you did is done. If they can't move on, just shut them out. Generally people like that are not worth your time or energy.
 
#16
Hate is a strong word. There is definitely anger involved. Had that happen when I was younger. Baby momma drama! For about a year straight, I would get calls from random people calling me names and cussing me out then hanging up until I recognized a voice once. Turned out to be the sister of my best friend (he didn't know) who was close to baby momma!



I'm kinda in a similar situation currently and I'm still harboring some anger for the individual involved. Not to the point that I need to send constant reminders to that person though. This person has attempted to smooth things over but I'm still pretty angry. I don't hate this person. Just dislike them and do not want to be within 50ft of them!
 
#20
Tommygunn said:
17-18.

Thanks for all the help and suggestions guys. Its been getting to me lately and I need to just ignore it I suppose.
Click to expand...

I would stop worrying about it. At that age, EVERYTHING is a crisis, nothing is taken in the way it was said and things said aren't always what were intended.

If I had to define that age, I would say "Things were said, feelings were hurt, thinking wasn't usually involved". It's all about feelings and rationality is often avoided.
 

Latest posts

Top Bottom
Back