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How important are personal beliefs in bands?

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Catbuster

Catbuster

Aug 25, 2010
1,551
538
Louisville, KY.
#1
So I joined a project that's already established and is gigging based on a tip from a friend. 5 piece rock/blues band.

Everything goes well until we start talking about the news and my inner right-wing conservative self comes out about Occupy Wall Street... Now, I'm a firm believer people need to work for what they get, and that if somebody isn't working that has the ability to do so, they need to be working. If they don't like the status of the U.S economy, they need to do something to stimulate it.

And... The guitar player's inner Zach De La Rocha comes out. I'm given a lecture about how hanging off the left is "the only way to be", and how I'm an "uninformed idiot" I storm off after hastily packing up, with him laughing his arse off.

So, the week of the gig. Monday practice, Friday show. I show up with no gear in my truck and tell him I won't be playing, so to find a suitable replacement. Only I used some other language. I don't plan on going back.

How important do you think personal beliefs are, and did I do the right thing?
 
#3
They are very important to me. Usually, I've gotten along with pretty much everyone I've played with. Someone will always pop up and test that, though. I was in a band once, in which I thought we were all on the same page. Singer does something outside of the band that jeopardizes my relationship with other friends: I quit during a recording session. I won't go into details, but it was similar to your situation.

When I sub for someone, or hired to record, it doesn't matter to me, and I don't bring anything up like that. Just like on a 9 to 5 job.
 
#4
I'm a left wing lunatic, however my band doesn't know that and they never will.

With a band like any other business, you don't discuss:

Politics

Race

Religion

You should have known that before you sharing unpopular views.
 
#5
bluewine said:
I'm a left wing lunatic, however my band doesn't know that and they never will.

With a band like any other business, you don't discuss:

Politics

Race

Religion

You should have known that before you sharing unpopular views.
Click to expand...

I agree, Blue, but sometimes there's no way around it. People say things.
 
#6
Catbuster said:
and my inner right-wing conservative self comes out
Click to expand...

I'm afraid that's where you went wrong, my friend. Keep that shite to yourself. Whenever you get into a situation where you are around people you have not interacted with before, just stay focused on what you are there for (in this case, the music), and keep your opinions of worldly topics to yourself, at least until you get to know the people better. Like the old saying goes, "a closed mouth gathers no feet."

Of course, that other dude's choice of behavior was clearly unprofessional, but it never would have reached that point if you would have not tee'd up the ball for him, and kept your "wingness" to yourself.
 
#7
Catbuster said:
So I joined a project that's already established and is gigging based on a tip from a friend. 5 piece rock/blues band.

Everything goes well until we start talking about the news and my inner right-wing conservative self comes out about Occupy Wall Street... Now, I'm a firm believer people need to work for what they get, and that if somebody isn't working that has the ability to do so, they need to be working. If they don't like the status of the U.S economy, they need to do something to stimulate it.

And... The guitar player's inner Zach De La Rocha comes out. I'm given a lecture about how hanging off the left is "the only way to be", and how I'm an "uninformed idiot" I storm off after hastily packing up, with him laughing his arse off.

So, the week of the gig. Monday practice, Friday show. I show up with no gear in my truck and tell him I won't be playing, so to find a suitable replacement. Only I used some other language. I don't plan on going back.

How important do you think personal beliefs are, and did I do the right thing?
Click to expand...

Not trying to start anything, just looking for advice.

I have head that before and, maybe my skin is thin too, so help me here.

I worked 36 years straight, 32 years at one company. After 32 years, I got fired for not putting down 10 minutes that they claimed I worked Over.

Now I have been out of work for almost 2 years. I look for work every day. I am willing to do about anything. I am 55 years old, too young to retire, too old to hire.

Thoughts brother bass player?
 
#8
SactoBass said:
I'm afraid that's where you went wrong, my friend. Keep that shite to yourself. Whenever you get into a situation where you are around people you have not interacted with before, just stay focused on what you are there for (in this case, the music), and keep your opinions of worldly topics to yourself, at least until you get to know the people better. Like the old saying goes, "a closed mouth gathers no feet."

Of course, that other dude's choice of behavior was clearly unprofessional, but it never would have reached that point if you would have not tee'd up the ball for him, and kept your "wingness" to yourself.
Click to expand...

Is it seriously too much to ask to have people answer a cut and dried question instead of dissecting what I did?
 
#9
Kwin Smith said:
I agree, Blue, but sometimes there's no way around it. People say things.
Click to expand...

True, sometimes someone will bring up or make a bigoted comment.

They are usually so ignorant and uninformed calling them out on it would be a waste of my time.
 
#10
I've been told many times by many people that it is just stupid to comment on two things: religion and politics (make it four if you include ethnicity/race/ nationality and gender). Why? Because almost everyone has a stand. Because almost everyone is passionate about their belief. And for no identifiable reason, almost everyone is deeply affected by comments that do not adhere to their belief in those topics.

If it appears to be stupid to bring this up in personal situations, why should anyone do so in a professional setting? That just spells trouble.

No offense to anyone. Just a heads up based on personal experience and by talking to others I consider very smart and with good judgement. Take it or leave it if you so desire.
 
#11
Catbuster said:
Is it seriously too much to ask to have people answer a cut and dried question instead of dissecting what I did?
Click to expand...

Sorry CB, I guess we TB'ers are just too accustomed to talking about things in detail (after all, this is a talk forum).

To answer your cut and dried question, personal beliefs should not be important. People should keep that stuff to themselves. And no, you didn't do the right thing (by choosing to not keep your wingness to yourself). But after the mud was slung and that other guy acting like a three year old toward you, I would have packed my bags and left too. Life is too short to hang around dweebs like that.
 
#13
And to Catbuster. I only ask this question of you cause this is an opportunity to ask someone with that opinion, nothing more.
So please share. Even PM please.



DJ Bebop said:
Not trying to start anything, just looking for advice.

I have head that before and, maybe my skin is thin too, so help me here.

I worked 36 years straight, 32 years at one company. After 32 years, I got fired for not putting down 10 minutes that they claimed I worked Over.

Now I have been out of work for almost 2 years. I look for work every day. I am willing to do about anything. I am 55 years old, too young to retire, too old to hire.

Thoughts brother bass player?
Click to expand...
 
#19
Catbuster said:
Is it seriously too much to ask to have people answer a cut and dried question instead of dissecting what I did?
Click to expand...

Well, don't get all wissy because someone answered a question you asked. And it was not, as you say, "cut and dried." It's not like you passed a note asking "do you like me? check yes or no."

You pulled a major no-no in bringing up your political beliefs, got huffy because one person disagreed with you, and quit the band (which, ostensibly, is made up of a few more people than you and one other guy.)

So, more than two people lost over this one, and on top of it you screwed the band right before a gig. That's pretty crappy in my book.

I played in a band with some Mormon guys, and I most certainly am not Mormon. I respect their beliefs, and they respected mine, and we got together and rocked. End of story.

While I will on occasion broach some delicate subjects with my friends, I approach them with tact and an open mind. Two things which seem to have been missing on both your and the guitarist's part. If one of you had risen above, the mess might have been quelled.

I know this post is going to upset you, but come on, man. Sometimes you just have to agree to disagree.
 
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