I assaulted a fan last night

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by Bassist4Eris, Mar 2, 2014.

  1. Bassist4Eris

    Bassist4Eris Frat-Pack Sympathizer

    Aug 11, 2012
    Upstate NY, USA
    I'm putting this under humor and gig stories because it's a gig story, not because I think it's funny. I'm not proud of this. This is really more of a confessional.

    As we were loading out after the show, there were a couple of guys outside the door where the bands load out. The one guy was very drunk. But he seemed all right. He complimented our set. But he was also having this weird, kind of pointless, drunken argument with his friend. So he was a little belligerent, but not to me. At first.

    Next trip out I had both hands full, carrying my pedalboard, amp head, and guitar stands, plus wearing a heavy backpack full of stuff. This guy decided to sit down right in the doorway. I was already a little annoyed that these guys had to be right by this door, but now he was completely blocking me.

    So I said "excuse me fellas, but we're trying to load out here. Can you guys please get clear of the doorway?"

    Drunk guy seemed to acknowledge me (he said "OK") but didn't move a muscle. So I asked politely again. Nothing. And again. Nothing.

    So I kicked him. Hard.

    Now, you have to understand, this is NOT in character for me. Yes, I can be high-strung, and yes, I can be difficult. But hitting another human being who, annoying and inconsiderate though he may be, has not made any physical threat towards me whatsoever? Not cool. I still don't know quite what came over me. Post-gig adrenaline maybe?

    So anyhow, this solved my immediate problem. Drunk guy went sprawling. Me and my band now able to load out. I carried my gear across the street to my car and began loading it into my trunk. By now, drunk guy is on his feet and flipping out. Now I'm thinking there's no way to avoid a fight. I've still got more gear in the bar, and he's between me and it. Sizing the guy up, he didn't look like much, plus he was very drunk, where I was stone sober. Still, you don't know what someone is capable of. But as I was loading the trunk, I spied my tire iron.

    There was a brief, crazy moment, where I saw myself grabbing the tire iron and charging the guy. Thankfully, another voice spoke up in my head. "No! Do NOT escalate this situation!"

    So what could I do? My basses were still in the bar. I walked up to the guy, unarmed, and with my hands at my sides. His hands were up, so I took his right hand in mine in one of those "arm wrestling" style handshakes, and put a hand on his shoulder. "Dude," I said, "I'm sorry I kicked you, BUT."

    "Don't ******* touch me, man!"

    I kept my hand on his shoulder. Yes, it was a deliberate attempt to subtly dominate him.

    "I shouldn't have kicked you" I said.

    "You could have asked me politely to move!"

    At this point his friend spoke up. "He asked you three or four times and you didn't budge".

    So eventually I got him to calm down and I went back into the bar. His friend followed me in. He approached me and said "dude, I just want to thank you for not hurting my friend. I know he was really asking for it."

    "No problem" I said. "I think he's a little drunk, and a little out of his depth."

    "He's a lot of both. Really, just thank you for not hurting him".

    "I feel bad that I lost my temper and kicked him."

    "You didn't lose your temper" he said.

    And in a way, he was right. I was a lot bigger than this guy, and although he was half my age, I feel pretty confident I could have taken him, and quickly at that. So I'm proud of having de-escalated the situation quickly. But I still can't believe I kicked him. By my own value system, that was wrong, wrong, wrong.

    Today, the back of the thigh of that leg hurts. I think I pulled something. Karma I guess.

    Anyhow, I'm a guy who believes that you go through experiences because there's something you're supposed to learn. And I'm still trying to figure out what that was all about.
  2. seang15


    Aug 28, 2008
    Cary NC
    Did he get your license plate or any other info? Plus, confirming you committed a felony on a public forum on the public Internet, not overly bright...Just saying.
  3. Well the good news is, that guy sounds drunk enough to where he won't even remember being kicked. He's just gonna wake up today..."ooh why does my back hurt so much"? Or in the scenario where he DOES remember, he's coming for you....;) :D
  4. Joedog


    Jan 28, 2010
    Pensacola FL
    Idiots like that are why bouncers exist.
  5. It was awfully rude of him to assault your foot with his ass like that. People really should control where they throw their ass around when they're drunk and stupid.

    But seriously, let the bouncer handle it, as Joedog says. Next time let his ass assault the bouncer's foot, and maybe his face can assault the bouncer's fist, too.
  6. Mystic Michael

    Mystic Michael Hip No Ties

    Apr 1, 2004
    New York, NY
    How about "People can be idiots"? That should suffice... :rolleyes:

    If he was as drunk as B4E claims, he'd be doing well to remember his own name, much less somebody's license plate number.

    Felony? Uh, no. :rollno:

  7. Bassist4Eris

    Bassist4Eris Frat-Pack Sympathizer

    Aug 11, 2012
    Upstate NY, USA
    I considered that. In the end it doesn't make a bit of difference. He knows who I am; my band had just got done playing. The incident was witnessed. And there's nothing in my post I wouldn't confess to. I lost my temper. Mea culpa.
  8. ErebusBass


    Feb 20, 2008
    Madison, WI
    What felony was committed?
  9. gearhead1972


    Feb 21, 2012
    Kent NY
    I probably would of done the same thing, but it would have been the back of my fearful 12/6/1 in the back of his head...oh sorry I didn't see you sitting there in the doorway...like my freaking dog does.
  10. Mr Grady

    Mr Grady

    Feb 26, 2006
    cant really say i blame you.....
    drunks and assholes are what spoil gigs for me.
    i dont mind the happy type, but the ones who think they can be rude, or throw abuse.....makes my blood boil.
    last gig we did, we were setting UP...so the evening had only just started. next to us was a crowd of guys, plus one bigmouth.
    all we got was, "can you play......" one example, and im not kidding.....was roger whitaker.......can you belive it? we play classic rock covers...
    so we all shake our heads and politly say no.
    then he throws song after song at us...laughing to his mates, knocking us for not knowing what he wants...now, im starting to see red.
    so i go up to him and say, there are millions of songs..you expect us to know them all
    thankfull, he soon went....god knows what he would be like drunk.
  11. Bassist4Eris

    Bassist4Eris Frat-Pack Sympathizer

    Aug 11, 2012
    Upstate NY, USA
    LOL, good point guys. I haven't been in a fistfight in 25 years. I kicked the guy once. You'll forgive me if I don't start shopping for soap-on-a-rope just yet. :D
  12. headband


    Oct 18, 2013
    Assault is the threat of violence, battery is physical violence - battery is usually a misdemeanor depending upon state law, and can escalate to felony depending upon the degree of injuries. I think a kick in the _____ would be a misdemeanor.
  13. nukes_da_bass

    nukes_da_bass Banned

    Feb 19, 2006
    west suburban boston
    I read your story OP. You didn't KICK him at all...you gently shoved him with your foot since your hands were full, to avoid dropping a hundred lbs of heavy equipment on his head, hence saving the sot from a terrible end.
    Well done you are a hero!
  14. Spent

    Spent Supporting Member

    May 15, 2011
    Upstate NY
  15. dude - you are a HERO - probably saved his life!

    Seriously though - and this is coming from a guy who's never been in a fight in my life - I can see the temptation to escalate it esp. if he is in your face, etc. Good job pulling it back to even keel. We all have our moments, and you did a great job handling it.
  16. One Drop

    One Drop

    Oct 10, 2004
    Swiss Alps
    I'm also non violent and have not been in a fight since high school, but I also kicked a guy a few years ago DURING a gig.

    Arsehole wouldn't stop trying to disconnect the guitarist's pedals and playing with them, was asked politely and then less so to stand down, wouldn't stop. Also screwing around with some girls up front, just being a complete tool.

    Finally when he started to unplug a pedal again I sauntered over to him and yelled at him to stop, but he continued while looking right at me, so I swung my foot into his soft belly. He was unprepared so it sickeningly sunk right in. The look on his face was priceless, I think he sobered up instantly as the nausea came on, then he dashed for the door never to be seen again.

    I felt very proud if slightly ashamed of myself, it was a beautiful moment.
  17. squirefan


    Nov 22, 2009
    Lansing, Ks.
    You said he was a fan?:confused:
  18. Bassamatic

    Bassamatic keepin' the beat since the 60's Supporting Member

    We had a drunk that insisted on coming up on the stage and hitting the drummer's cymbals with his hands and trying to sing in one of the mics. This went on for a long time as he ignored our requests to get off the stage. We were all about to explode. Our drummer is a really big guy - I don't know how he kept his cool. During a break I was about to take the drunk out the back door and introduce him to my little stun gun pal, when his buddy came up and walked him out of the bar. Sometimes they deserve it and you just can't help yourself.
  19. sparkyfender2


    Nov 25, 2013
    One of the many joys of bar gigs and alcohol consumption in public.

    Most people in a club are a-ok, but there is always "that guy" who tries to muck it up for everyone.
  20. jgroh

    jgroh Supporting Member

    Sep 14, 2007
    I dont know I would have kicked him these days, but I probably would have done much worse when I was younger. The guy didnt seem hurt and probably doesnt even remember it. I wouldnt sweat it. Something similar happened last year at a gig to me. It was the end of a gig at a place we play alot. I was taking my bass, a mint Ric 4003, into the "kitchen" which was closed but they let us store out cases and stuff in there while playing. Some drunk idiot goes, "oh thanks for bringing me my bass..." and tries to grab it. I dodged that and he starts with "hey, thats my bass, give it to me!". I ignored it.

    Then when I was loading out to my truck, the idiot was outside the front door and goes, "oh thanks, you brought me my truck...". I told him to shut the f up or Im going to hurt him. He shut up and his friends busted out laughing. If he would have pushed it I would have physically altered his consciousness.