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I don't think I can match their dedication

BKBassDude

BKBassDude

Jun 17, 2009
225
2
Brooklyn, NY
#1
So a bit of background, friend of mine and I have been playing together on and off in original projects for a few years. Until recently, none have gotten past the rehearsal stage. Last week we had our first show with this new project.

Show went fine, it was a poorly matched bill, but we actually managed to get a solid crowd reaction out of people who I wouldn't think would be into our music.

This reaction has gotten the other band members heads clouded, IMO. They think that this project is destined for stardom. They are asking for significant amounts of my time, money and some odd requests (including a message to "be wary of my social media appearance, because you're a public figure now" ***?)

While I think the songs are good and could very well have some commercial success, I'm more realistic than the others. I've been in bands who I thought were better before and nothing happened. I'm not really trying to take big risks for the minute chance of making money with an original project at this point in my life (We are 26-33 in age, BTW). I have another band that plays a few times a year and records every so often, and I find that band more satisfying on every level.

So anyone been in a similar situation? I'd like to continue to play with them if it means once a week rehearsals and monthly shows. But if they are trying to get me to change my life around, I think it might have to end soon.

Thoughts?
 
#4
After only ONE show? What world they live in? It's good you guys had a good reaction from the audience, but "stardom"? Talking about blowing things out of proportion. They should be more humble, or reality will slam hard on their faces.

Be wary about their delusion. It's good you're a realist because you see both the good and bad outcomes, and are prepared for either.
 
#6
carlthegroover said:
After only ONE show? What world they live in? It's good you guys had a good reaction from the audience, but "stardom"? Talking about blowing things out of proportion. They should be more humble, or reality will slam hard on their faces.

Be wary about their delusion. It's good you're a realist because you see both the good and bad outcomes, and are prepared for either.
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I mean these people had the same feelings after hearing the EP. I seem to be the only one who doesn't feel this project has some sort of destiny attached to it.

I think what's really keeping me in it is I've worked with the frontman for 4 years and watched several projects fizzle out. He's a genuinely good guy and a talented vocalist/songwriter/guitarist. I'm pretty sure me leaving would end our friendship.
 
#9
I could be reading this all wrong, but from the sounds of it, some of these guys probably aren't as seasoned as you. I remember thinking like they're thinking back when I was gigging in high school--I thought we were destined for superstardom. But reality came around and knocked me down a peg or two. It will do the same for them eventually.

I'd say, Let them enjoy it for now. If it gets to where you just can't stand it anymore, bail.
 
#10
Lee Moses said:
I could be reading this all wrong, but from the sounds of it, some of these guys probably aren't as seasoned as you. I remember thinking like they're thinking back when I was gigging in high school--I thought we were destined for superstardom. But reality came around and knocked me down a peg or two. It will do the same for them eventually.

I'd say, Let them enjoy it for now. If it gets to where you just can't stand it anymore, bail.
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Oddly enough, with the exception of the frontman (who is probably the second most realistic besides myself) everyone is a fairly seasoned vet of bands of varying success, which is what makes it all the more odd that they seem so caught up in this.
 
#11
BKBassDude said:
Oddly enough, with the exception of the frontman (who is probably the second most realistic besides myself) everyone is a fairly seasoned vet of bands of varying success, which is what makes it all the more odd that they seem so caught up in this.
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Hmmm . . . I'm kind of at a loss, then. You did say, "I think the songs are good and could very well have some commercial success." IDK, maybe their optimism is actually realistic? :hmm:
 
#13
Lee Moses said:
Hmmm . . . I'm kind of at a loss, then. You did say, "I think the songs are good and could very well have some commercial success." IDK, maybe their optimism is actually realistic? :hmm:
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I think in a perfect storm of factors, the music could do well. I'm just realistic enough to know that describes many bands who never break out of the local scene. The amount of things that are out of your control in order to make money with original music is astounding.
 
#16
BKBassDude said:
I think in a perfect storm of factors, the music could do well. I'm just realistic enough to know that describes many bands who never break out of the local scene. The amount of things that are out of your control in order to make money with original music is astounding.
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Well, some of the necessary factors to making it that you CAN control (to a degree) include believing in yourselves and commitment. This is not a knock on you at all--but they seem to have that part down, and you probably don't. It would probably be better for them if they find a bassist whose belief and commitment matches theirs, and it would probably be better for you to devote more energy to the projects you find more satisfying.

I'm not telling you to quit today or anything, but it might be something to think about, and it sounds along the lines of what you've already been thinking.
 
#18
Good tunes.:bassist:

I wouldn't bein a band with a guy over 18 named "Lynxx" though. If he trained jungle cats in the zoo, maybe.:p

I played with a singer named Billy Roxx and I thought that was cheesy!

Send your demos to the big record companies. If you get lots of response, they may be right, but likely not.
 
#20
BKBassDude said:
While I think the songs are good and could very well have some commercial success...
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If this is not incentive and does not excite you like it does the others, time to bow out now.

However, don't knock others for being encouraged by this. It's what I would call a hell of a start.

Being in a band is always an investment at first, with little to no actual monetary rewards and a lot of doubt about what the future holds. You invest in gear, clothes, transportation, countless hours of learning rehearsing and performing. It is a labor of love.

If you don't think it's going to amount to much, no one can prove you wrong. But your attitude, in contrast to your band mates, is most definitely wrong.

And the fact remains: Someone is going to make it in this business. Someone does it every day.
 

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