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I hate my band

#22
I've gone through this and it's not easy. I did the quit method with explanation and I did the meeting with I'll still do some of yours if you'll do mine thing. (it was close enough in style) They both ended badly. It's not just wanting to leave but what happens when they can't replace you and their dream falls apart. "You broke up the band" syndrome. Bottom line is you'll be miserable if your not true to yourself.
 
#23
MrMeacham said:
I've gone through this and it's not easy. I did the quit method with explanation and I did the meeting with I'll still do some of yours if you'll do mine thing. (it was close enough in style) They both ended badly. It's not just wanting to leave but what happens when they can't replace you and their dream falls apart. "You broke up the band" syndrome. Bottom line is you'll be miserable if your not true to yourself.
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Broke up the Band syndrome is probably the worst in this situation because there are almost no bassists in the area and none of any quality. I try to stay modest, but watchinging the bassists in my area is like watching a parade of failure. I wish them the best of luck, but leaving the band would hit it pretty hard.
 
#24
Unless you're living on your playing, it's time to quit. Tell the band, agree to stay on a reasonable amount of time for them to get a new bassist and get him up to speed. Do set a time limit or they may not put too much effort in finding your replacement.

You may also want to spend some time figuring out what you WANT to play, otherwise you may end up in the same situation in a year or so.
 
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#25
SMILEYSIXX said:
Good try, but that will be a no-go. As I said, I've pretty much left metal behind completely. I like playing music in all forms, but I look at it in a potential listener's shoes. If I were to hear this music on the radio, I'd call it **** and turn it off, I just don't like hearing it. The only "change in musical direction" I would be fine with would be a total alteration of the genre, which would be pointless, seeing as how I'm already starting an indie ska band with other people.
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Well, it seems like your decision has been made, and it is time to move on. Hopefully your friends will be cool with this and respect your point of view.
 
#31
SMILEYSIXX said:
I started wiith these guys a while ago, just messing around. Finally get a good drummer and it all starts falling in place. Things get serious, write some songs, etc. When we started, I was totally into this, but now... no. We're a metal band. I was really into metal for quite a few years, but as many of you know, tastes change. I have grown to hate metal with a burning passion. These guys are my best friends, and I love playing any music, it really gets me going, but I hate THIS music. I want to like it, but I can't. Is it time for me to move on?
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Just from the vibe I get OFF OF (sorry, inside joke) this post, I think you may well kill something. So, yes, you should probably quit.
:ninja:
 
#37
bolophonic said:
I am not buying the fact that you used to love a type of music passionately, but now you simply hate the entire genre with a burning passion. Especially coming from a buddhist.
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i dunno, i kinda get what hes talking about.

i mean, for me, it took a few years for my styles to change this drastic, back in high school i used to LIVE for Marilyn Manson, now im grooving to Front Page. (Invalid Link Removed)

if you put Manson on today, I cant be in the same room cause it just rubs me the wrong way. I wont say i hate it because their bassist was one of my biggest influences when I first started out, but its just not my thing anymore.
 
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#38
Joe Nerve said:
My bad, you've got the right bass. Quit the band. :)
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LOL !!!

And I don't even SAY LOL...


I can only say that when you're in the RIGHT band for you that also plays the right MUSIC for you... you'll wonder why you didn't make the change sooner. They're you're friends, they'll understand. Help them find a good replacement and offer to stick around a while until they are ready.
 
#39
bolophonic said:
I am not buying the fact that you used to love a type of music passionately, but now you simply hate the entire genre with a burning passion. Especially coming from a buddhist.
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I don't care if you buy it, I'm telling you the situation. I don't hate the entire genre, a few bands still do sound good to me, but put on any Slipknot, Disturbed, A7X, etc and I'll probably kill myself. Crank some Mastodon or Dimmu Borgir and I love it. Not to mention I still love doom and drone metal. But I have no idea how my spiritual preference relates to that at all.
 
#40
Not to Hi-Jack the thread, but I'm in a similar situation..
Except for I am the band leader. I write all of the songs, and they throw in their own flavors and to me it just ruins the songs. I'm a fan of Hardcore bands like Converge, Cursed, Trap Them, New Lows, etc. So I write songs similar to that style, and they turn them into Death Metal songs complete with endless double bass and stupid harmonic squeals. On top of that, they're constantly doing things that i think are totally stupid. Like they for some reason think it's cool to wear halloween masks at shows. I just feel really stupid a lot of the time.

I kind of want to move on, but I'M the one holding the band together.
 

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