First thing is an experienced musician learns to temper their impressions at GC using some dubious rig with wanking in the background and relies more on actual perception of the voice of the instrument in the mix at actual gigs.
Second, an experienced musician also learns to record themselves in these gig situations, listen objectively, make adjustments, and make go/no-go decisions after working at it for a while.
As to comments from critics, it also takes some time to learn which are worth listening to and which can be ignored.
Your wife may have good ears; I have no idea. Jazz basses solo in the store can sound clanky. That same sound can also work really well in certain (many) mixes. (A big) part of that is how you play. A Jazz Bass may not fit your current playing style or gig. That's why there are other basses.
Ultimately, your wife has her opinion, you have yours, and everyone else has theirs. The Jazz Bass has been around for 52 years, and doesn't look like it is going anywhere soon, at least while live music persists. A bunch of TB banter on this topic isn't going to change the latter, nor will it probably change the former.
FWIW, my wife says they all sound like a bass; except the Alembic Series I, which shakes the house. I love her, but still use whatever bass suits the situation. Sometimes, that is a Jazz, of which I am very fond.
