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I'm in London. Where should I go?

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Get a big dish of beef chow mein!
 
There's the obvious stuff - the British Museum, the National Gallery, the Tata Modern, Buckingham Palace.

But the National Portrait Gallery is great, the British Library always has great and interesting things on display. The Cabinet War Rooms are fascinating if WWII history interests you. The original Tate in Chelsea has a great collection.

Go to Hampton Court. Do a day trip to York. Or Greenwich

The bass shops already mentioned are worth a trip. Denmark St isn't as awesome as it used to be. That's a neighborhood that has really changed in the last 20 years.

Go to Brick Lane for a curry. Or if you're in Ealing, go to Monty's.

If you're in Notting Hill, go to the Windsor Castle pub.