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Is this proper jam etiquette?

If I am afraid that someone experimenting with amp settings is going to ruin my gear, it means my cab doesn't match my amp well in the first place. In which case, I wouldn't have brought that particular setup to an open mic gig.

That said, if someone sounds terrible over my gear it still their problem, not mine. What I would have had issues with in that situation is taking 20 mins to dial something in. I have done gigs or sat in on provided gear with like 30 seconds to setup. In those situations, I just don't bring my pedals for example. There is always a musical solution for everything-if a string breaks I'll find that note somewhere else on the neck or play that part an octave lower or whatever.

There is an audience there and they don't need a 'soundcheck' longer than the act, and to me it's the musician's responsibility to get something he can work with out of any situation, whether there's little time or no time, gear or no gear.
 
You way over-reacted. If you are providing backline equipment to share with other bassists, then you must anticipate that they will adjust the knobs to dial in their tone. Since you had a cellphone photo of "your" settings, you should have been able to set them back very easily without the drama. You put the jam leader in a very uncomfortable situation. :(

+1

This is the way I see it. Though as the owner of the gear you are entitled to lay down any rules you want about its usage. It just seems overly controlling for no good reason. He wasn't harming your gear and you could easily restore your settings.
 
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There used to be a spot called Goodfellas in Hampton, VA. They had a Tues. open mic and had some cheap gear to use. They had a Peavey TNT130 combo bass amp. Solid workhorse. Not the greatest tone and no tweeter. Well, there was this one guy who would literally max out everything and just brutalize that amp! The owner never seemed to mind other than to monitor volume levels.
 
There used to be a spot called Goodfellas in Hampton, VA. They had a Tues. open mic and had some cheap gear to use. They had a Peavey TNT130 combo bass amp. Solid workhorse. Not the greatest tone and no tweeter. Well, there was this one guy who would literally max out everything and just brutalize that amp! The owner never seemed to mind other than to monitor volume levels.

That's called the HENDRIX SETTING
 
This is a many-faceted issue.

1) As long as he's not cranking the amp to the point of damage risk, I think he's well within his rights to adjust the tone on the amp in this setting. I think it's a generally unspoken understanding that you can adjust "house" gear to a reasonable extent at a jam session to dial in your tone. (FWIW, this is exactly the reason I do NOT supply my personal amp for open mics - it's an easy way to avoid the entire mess.)

2) Since you do have your settings saved somewhere, it's not unreasonable to re-set them when you plug back in, just as it isn't unreasonable for someone to tweak them a bit.

3) If he's really taking that long and it's interrupting the flow of the open mic/jam session, it's the band leader's job to tell him to hurry it up.

4) If the bassist sitting in really is being a jerk about it (completely ignoring your minor request), and it is your personal equipment, you do have the right to refuse him use; however, the house band should know well in advance that you're finicky about your settings. Packing up your amp for that reason is quite a shock to the band, and can be viewed as unreasonable in this setting. This gives them the chance to provide their own back-line gear so as not to risk losing your amp mid-session. I think you did put the bandleader in a very awkward position.

These are only my opinions, but I think some of these are unspoken rules about open mics and use of back-line gear - no matter who's providing.
 
BTW, I have already been invited to the next jam. Kirby has not. I guess we know what the score is here.

Yay! You won a meaningless battle and ostracised a member of your musical community. Good for you?

BTW, he was playing a Rick 4003 which, even after the endless fiddling, still sounded like crap next to my Carvin Icon 4P.

Yeah... This just sounds catty. Bad form.
 
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I'm in TS' camp on this one. Even if he does appear a little condescending. I don't trust anyone with my gear unless I know them and have instructed them on how much of what they can and can't use. You'd be surprised how many great players there are out there that don't know squat about how to treat gear.
 
I remember years ago sharing a rig with another bassist who was adamant that I not touch any EQ on his amp or 10 band graphic EQ, as it had taken him "months" to get it to where it was. I did notice, though, to my great amusement, that the graphic EQ was set exactly opposite from the EQ on his amp. I didn't have the heart to tell him.
 
If I'm asked to supply a rig for an open jam it will be my B or C rig for starters, and I will set it up, plug in my bass and get a tone I like from it. After that it is up to each individual player to monkey with it as they see fit. All my heads are cased, so short of picking it up and dashing it on the floor, they can't hurt the thing and it is an open jam after all so if they want to spend their stage time piddling with knobs instead of playing bass, that's their business.

If I attend a jam with a supplied amp, I find the main volume so I can avoid pops while plugging in then I set the main volume to about half and adjust my bass as needed to get a good balance with the rest of the players I'm up with and it's on like donkey kong. The only time I would consider trying to adjust the amp would be if it's all high or all low or some other extreme. I guess I've been lucky because so far I've never not been able to find an acceptable tone using the VVT on the little MIM J I take to open jams.
 
I think a 2x10" + 18" sub is excessive for an open mic.
I disagree, excessive should be the goal, for the simple reason people can be morons. I'd rather have too much rig for the room, so when they turn it up too loud the amp can handle it. Expecting people to respect your gear is a risky move, whether it's accidental due to inexperience or just not caring about other people's stuff. A bass amp that is adequate for the room but requires some restraint is a recipe for an expensive amp repair or more likely blown speakers. Sometimes you can hear it going on and intervene in time. I'd rather have a larger safety factor in place as insurance.

Randy
 
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I play a lot of open mics, most times I'll throw a small amp in the truck (just in case) I usually take my B200 Acoustic. easy to carry and can handle most rooms.
When I use another person's amp, I ask the owner if there is a problem with my making some adjustments. If there is, I don't adjust the amp. If these isn't, I usually use my phone to take a picture of the settings, before changing them to suit my ear. When I'm through, I will take a moment to reset the amp back to the original settings before leaving the stage.

I've never received a complaint from the amp's owner.
 
I think you over reacted. I've been the bassist for the house band quite a few times at open jams and I think it goes with the territory that people are going to adjust controls on your equipment. I think it is respectful to ask the owner of the equipment if that is ok, but if they don't, I'm not going to make a scene out of it. The only problem I truly have is if they put a drink on my cab, or sit on it. I can't imagine anyone taking 20 minutes to get ready, and can only imagine the other musicians would get fed up and start with out him.
 
I remember years ago sharing a rig with another bassist who was adamant that I not touch any EQ on his amp or 10 band graphic EQ, as it had taken him "months" to get it to where it was. I did notice, though, to my great amusement, that the graphic EQ was set exactly opposite from the EQ on his amp. I didn't have the heart to tell him.

That's pretty funny. I also wonder if he had a contractor come in and reconstruct the room he found those EQ settings in, since ya know, EQ settings are going to be the same, no matter if you're playing in a concrete basement or an all-wooden hall.
 
+1. If I'm supplying backline, I might ask not to pass a certain volume setting or maybe not max out the bass on the EQ, but tweaking a little is natural. Taking 20 minutes isn't reasonable for a 'jam'. I respect your right to protect your equipment, but fiddling with the knobs, within volume limits, is to be expected.

That was my take as well... I could see a request to keep the volume at a reasonable level .. but to ask him not to tweak the tone at all is asking a lot.. "your amp your rules" notwithstanding.. I could see you being upset if he cranked up the bass and the volume and started going nuts..