Hi everybody, I'm new here. Started playing about 2 years ago and am really trying to work on my technique.
First, my left thumb never knows where to go. I follow Adam Neely's video and slant it towards the neck when playing in the lower frets, but even so, it feels like my thumb is too..."long" sometimes? In some playing positions, it's like it's going "into" the neck. Also seen advice about not bending the knuckle of the thumb, but without that, sometimes the pad of my thumb isn't making contact with the neck. It'll be the corner of my nail or the bony inside of the knuckle that touches the neck first, and that's very uncomfortable.
I use 1-2-4 fingering below fret 5 because I have small hands, and this is where the angled thumb (which I need to have, otherwise my wrist will bend) becomes a problem because I need more pressure to fret evenly - and now my thumb, as a fulcrum, is too far out to be of any good. Unless I stick my elbow out like ten inches, the angle of my left hand seems to invariably differ here. It's more parallel to my neck in the middle (or rather, you can think of fingers 1 through 4 as coming at the frets more perpendicular), but farther out, the two don't match up at all. When I *do* use a 1-2-3-4 span in the lower frets I have to deal with a lot of shifting/pivoting.
I've gone to two bass instructors, who think my thumb positioning is fine, but they do believe my fingers pivot and fly off the fretboard too easily. But because the hand is at a different angle than the neck, I can't clamp them all down without my palm and the meat around the base of my thumb tensing up. I don't get wrist pain/tension. But I do get a good amount of left hand cramping/tension when I play in the lower frets for too long.

I really have no idea what to do. I guess what I'm asking is if the angle and space between my hand and the frets is "normal" or if I really have to stick my elbow out and get it more parallel. Or maybe I should point my wrist up more? Then I run the risk of my thumb wrapping over the neck, though, and losing some speed.
I've attached two pictures to try and illustrate what I'm talking about. I know there's no one right answer but I've let myself get psyched out about this. Could really appreciate some others' perspectives. Thanks!
First, my left thumb never knows where to go. I follow Adam Neely's video and slant it towards the neck when playing in the lower frets, but even so, it feels like my thumb is too..."long" sometimes? In some playing positions, it's like it's going "into" the neck. Also seen advice about not bending the knuckle of the thumb, but without that, sometimes the pad of my thumb isn't making contact with the neck. It'll be the corner of my nail or the bony inside of the knuckle that touches the neck first, and that's very uncomfortable.
I use 1-2-4 fingering below fret 5 because I have small hands, and this is where the angled thumb (which I need to have, otherwise my wrist will bend) becomes a problem because I need more pressure to fret evenly - and now my thumb, as a fulcrum, is too far out to be of any good. Unless I stick my elbow out like ten inches, the angle of my left hand seems to invariably differ here. It's more parallel to my neck in the middle (or rather, you can think of fingers 1 through 4 as coming at the frets more perpendicular), but farther out, the two don't match up at all. When I *do* use a 1-2-3-4 span in the lower frets I have to deal with a lot of shifting/pivoting.
I've gone to two bass instructors, who think my thumb positioning is fine, but they do believe my fingers pivot and fly off the fretboard too easily. But because the hand is at a different angle than the neck, I can't clamp them all down without my palm and the meat around the base of my thumb tensing up. I don't get wrist pain/tension. But I do get a good amount of left hand cramping/tension when I play in the lower frets for too long.

I really have no idea what to do. I guess what I'm asking is if the angle and space between my hand and the frets is "normal" or if I really have to stick my elbow out and get it more parallel. Or maybe I should point my wrist up more? Then I run the risk of my thumb wrapping over the neck, though, and losing some speed.
I've attached two pictures to try and illustrate what I'm talking about. I know there's no one right answer but I've let myself get psyched out about this. Could really appreciate some others' perspectives. Thanks!