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Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by pklima, Sep 26, 2013.
I think the audience might flip you... the bird.
What's the best accordion for metal?
Do not ask, for ye shall receive.
That's just a representation of how evil Irish folk music is, surely?
I really hate all the debate about using a pick or fingers to play a bass or guitar... Picks, like fingers, are tools and are used by the player as they want ... Let it go ... BUT there is an issue in using other body parts to play guitar.... Are teeth OK...? I don't know .. I do know they are hard to pass around so others can try them and harder to get in custom colors!
Denti$t$ love 'm!
The more often you play with your teeth, the more moolah to your denti$t you'll bequeath.
The best teeth for metal are, of course, metal ones as exemplified by Jaws from the James Bond movies.
But dentists love it when you floss as you play!
Apparently these are the best teeth for metal....
The more rings you wear — earrings, nose-rings, thumb-rings, nipple-rings, toe-rings, skull rings, etc. — the more your instrument will ring. With enough rings in situ, sustain will, theoretically, become infinite and anything will be possible, including time travel and world domination. Abundant strategic piercings, on the other hand, in sufficient quantity, while not being so all-embracing, will guarantee that you cut through any mix, no matter what.
Spoilt for choice, we are The world at your fingertips or international fame? Rings true, either way. Just be sure to bone up on the music in the set-list and avoid large magnets and metal detectors, at all cost. Drug rings do not qualify, entirely unhelpful, so keep that in mind. Same with bath rings — gotta draw the line somewhere
I just use a ring modulator.
I popped a bondo tooth repair off a front tooth once playing like Hendrix on the bass. Them heavy flats got no give at all. The new jagged edge did give me a sort of "plectrum" effect though...
There is but one string manufactured.
Kinda like how transistors vary, due to the lack of fine-tolerances during manufacturing, even though they're made on the same apparatus, each string wildly differs from the next. Before children-employment laws came into effect, waifs from orphanages and wayward homes were used to sort the strings into loose groupings (banjo, violin, guitar, bass etc) — then more stringent groupings "roundwound" with "roundwound", so-called flatwounds and groundwounds etc. From those loose groupings, the strings are filter-siphoned through special "string-trees" according to their diameter with abnomalies hand-sorted to the nearest logical size-comparison. Further organisation into string sets can then be administered.
Alas the string industry had to retool and retrain once child-wage/employment laws came into effect, all the kids were given redundancy slips and those tasks they once undertook are now performed by specially-trained Macaques. The quality control is almost as good as with the kids, except for when a Macaque caca fight breaks out between sorters, this is why some strings sound like ... dung. It is very difficult to clean strings affected by one of these feces-flinging fights.
Nonetheless, strings do get made and sorted and then tested... for peanuts on the dollar. Thus other primates are now being put to work as well.
No gender discrimination.
Sometimes Keith Richards drops by the factory...
If you stop drinking Coke, you’ll be funky......if you’re white that is.
and if you stop drinking alcohol, you will lose all those 'really cool' dance moves that usually come out after a few drinks
...and lose the ability to play those 'super cool' bass solos.
What nonsense is this "not drinking"?
Pay them no attention...they are too far gone to be rescued.
This is misinformation, remember?
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