Music Hating Spouse

[perfektspace6]

This topic may very well have been discussed in past posts but would like to hear from any sympathetic brethren out there - my wife is a wonderful person in every way…except one. She absolutely has no tolerance for music and sees absolutely no purpose in listening to music let alone spending hours playing it.

Anybody else in this boat? How do you deal with it?

No idea what is going on but first thought that jumped out at me:

She trying to control something you like that does not involve her and that you receive great enjoyment from. You could test this hypothesis by starting to do something else that does not involve here that you really enjoy and see how she reacts over time.

 

[higain617]

I have a friend whose wife only likes Christmas music and plays it every day of the year, I'd take the non-music loving spouse any day over that. If you wife doesn't interfere with your passion, no biggie.

My father was like that. He wasn't the festive type, but loved him some Mannheim Steamroller.

 

[mambo4]

She absolutely respects my passion for playing and has never ever put up any roadblocks to me playing. She just wants nothing to do with it

How do you deal with it?

If she doesn't actively create friction around your musical pursuits, I don't see the problem.
Maybe you simply need to adjust your own expectations / wishes regarding her preferences.

 

[bobba66]

The night she came home and tried to shoot me I knew the bloom was off the rose.

 

[fork]

My ex only liked music when dancing, otherwise she never listened to it.

Then one day on a road trip, while trying to find anything musically she could tolerate, I put on some reggae and she absolutely loved it.

She didn’t grow dreads or start smoking ganja, but anytime she’s driving, reggae is on.

 

[aprod]

Maybe she is an alien. The love of music is hardwired in humans.

 

[mike buzzetti]

Shoot her out of a cannon lmfao !!!

 

[Bass-ball]

@Womber - between use of the word "brethren," possession of a Jim Brickman CD, and marrying someone with no appreciation for something this important to you, can I guess where you're located?

 

[Jeff Scott]

I have a friend whose wife only likes Christmas music and plays it every day of the year, I'd take the non-music loving spouse any day over that.

ABSOLUTELY!

 

[noahw1]

Wow. I don’t know what to say to that. I just can’t imagine it.

 

[Pimpernel Smith]

USA: Different strokes for different folks.
UK: Different horses for different courses.

 

[whero]

I've just recently accepted that I don't like Radiohead and that that is ok. I have been told for so long how great they are that I have always just believed it, thinking there was something wrong with me. It's great to be free of the burden of revisiting their albums every once in a while trying to understand what I am missing. But congratulations to you and your wife, you both must have some deeper connection to universe than I can obtain.

And although I love Radiohead, I think that's great. The world would be a pretty boring place if everybody liked the same stuff.

 

[Womber]

What do you mean you “can only really” listen to music on headphones? Why?

Your wife doesn’t enjoy music so you have to use headphones?

Yes. If I have music on and she walks in the room she politely asks for me to turn it down ( and by down she really means off ) but she seems fine if I have headphones on and cannot hear a word she is saying which is weird.

 

[slam dunk]

This topic may very well have been discussed in past posts but would like to hear from any sympathetic brethren out there - my wife is a wonderful person in every way…except one. She absolutely has no tolerance for music and sees absolutely no purpose in listening to music let alone spending hours playing it. She has one CD, Jim Brickman, that she listens to once or twice a year as background noise at a volume that a White Tail Deer would have a hard time hearing.

She absolutely respects my passion for playing and has never ever put up any roadblocks to me playing. She just wants nothing to do with it. And if I am listening to music I can only really do it with headphones on which is not sissy’s practical.

Anybody else in this boat? How do you deal with it?

I had a wife like that once.

 

[definenredefine]

I had a wife like that once.

"Once."

...

I'm sorry.

 

[Nedmundo]

My wife loves music and our tastes largely overlap, which is great. But over the years she has developed a dislike for most live music. She gets bored very quickly, and thus almost never wants to see shows, even of artists she likes. (Some exceptions: Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Dengue Fever, Iggy, shows associated with Philly Loves David Bowie Week. She's always up for those.) This can be good, of course, because sometimes I'd prefer to go on my own or with others, but it's a bummer sometimes too.

For example, last night after dinner we happened across an absolutely ripping Latin-American band playing in Love Park in Philly. These guys were killing it, with three lead vocalists, two percussionists, horn section, upright bass, and keys. Very funky, much groove. She wanted to leave after hearing one track. I convinced her to stay for another, but that was it, and I didn't want to kill the vibe of the evening by staying on my own, so we left.