My forum has been closed....

[MatticusMania]

Cudos to the winners and the OP.

Amd Kudos to me because I like granola bars with chocolate chips!

 

[mike_v_s]

TB unwritten bylaws prohibit the banned from winning prizes. And I am sure that blimps are the last thing on his mind while he is in JT's dungeon of despair. I should at least get something for my mustache haiku.

The impromptu smattering of haikus was nice, but I din't feel right judging them.

Mike

 

[Simo98]

Alright, which one of you guys did me out of a blimp?

 

[username n/a]

Alright, which one of you guys did me out of a blimp?

Hi

Here's the winning essay. I shall post pics of the prize when it arrives.

Blimps and Blimp Related Thoughts Pertaining Especially to Blimp Contests by username n/a

A blimp as defined my Merriam-Webster is “an airship that maintains its form by pressure from contained gas”, however a blimp as defined by me is the only thing to live for. That may seem a little extreme to some, but to me it’s the truth. Nothing else in this world can give one the same joy of driving into the sunset in a blimp. Nothing else can give you the same sense of power as slowly hovering over the masses in your giant mass of pretencious-endusing-beauty. In this essay I shall try and sway you into crowning me, Robert Jamieson, avid blimp enthusiast, as the winner of your contest. I will do this by using multiple examples such as my general love for blimps, my knowledge of the history of the blimp, and my hope for the future of the blimp.

I would first like to address my love for the blimp. For as long as I can remember I’ve had a strong affection for blimps. I was mocked by the other children for this. While they were drawing trains on their notebooks I was building model blimps. I went so far in 7th grade to re-write the script of Planes, Trains, and Automobiles as Blimps, Blimps, and Blimps. It was probably one of the greatest things ever written. I’m still waiting for a studio to pick it up. When they do I think I’ll finally be able to afford a Sperenger AF-4900, but I digress. By the time I was a freshmen in high school I was wearing my prized Blimps Are Cool! tee-shirt everyday. I was greatly ridiculed by me peers, but I assure you they were just jealous. As you can see I have loved blimps for the whole of my life.

One of the only things that could match my love of blimps is my knowledge of the history of blimps. Only being 17 I’ve yet to attend college. However I fully intend to attend college (and with the help of the Nation Blimp Scholarship Fund none the less) to major in Blimp History and minor in Blimp Education. Nothing excites me more than cracking open a dusty old book full of descriptions of the blimps and blimp related paraphernalia of yesteryear. John Kane’s famous “Blimp-Slip” for example, is something that we today might find comical, but folks in the 50’s thought was mind-blowing amazing.

Another reason, in addition to my love of blimps and my knowledge, and quest thereof of blimp history, as to why I should win your contest is my hope for the future of blimps. I lie awake at night thinking of a future where blimps rule the sky. A future were blimps are the only form of transportation. This may seem horrible to some of the blimp-enthusiasts who feel blimps shouldn’t be used by the masses. People who feel blimps should only be the play toys of the few. But it my world your everyday Joe will be able to take his family out to the blimp park and enjoy a lazy Sunday with his family, working class twenty-somethings will be able to take their girlfriends to the hover-in theater and cuddle with the illumination of Sylvester Stallone punching in someone’s face.

I hope this essay, my love for blimps, my quest for blimp related knowledge, and my enthusiasm for the future of the blimp have swayed you to crown me a victor of your contest. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and good luck with your contest. Live long and prosper my friend trough blimping and bassing.

 

[sloasdaylight]

Hi

Here's the winning essay. I shall post pics of the prize when it arrives.

Blimps and Blimp Related Thoughts Pertaining Especially to Blimp Contests by username n/a

A blimp as defined my Merriam-Webster is “an airship that maintains its form by pressure from contained gas”, however a blimp as defined by me is the only thing to live for. That may seem a little extreme to some, but to me it’s the truth. Nothing else in this world can give one the same joy of driving into the sunset in a blimp. Nothing else can give you the same sense of power as slowly hovering over the masses in your giant mass of pretencious-endusing-beauty. In this essay I shall try and sway you into crowning me, Robert Jamieson, avid blimp enthusiast, as the winner of your contest. I will do this by using multiple examples such as my general love for blimps, my knowledge of the history of the blimp, and my hope for the future of the blimp.

I would first like to address my love for the blimp. For as long as I can remember I’ve had a strong affection for blimps. I was mocked by the other children for this. While they were drawing trains on their notebooks I was building model blimps. I went so far in 7th grade to re-write the script of Planes, Trains, and Automobiles as Blimps, Blimps, and Blimps. It was probably one of the greatest things ever written. I’m still waiting for a studio to pick it up. When they do I think I’ll finally be able to afford a Sperenger AF-4900, but I digress. By the time I was a freshmen in high school I was wearing my prized Blimps Are Cool! tee-shirt everyday. I was greatly ridiculed by me peers, but I assure you they were just jealous. As you can see I have loved blimps for the whole of my life.

One of the only things that could match my love of blimps is my knowledge of the history of blimps. Only being 17 I’ve yet to attend college. However I fully intend to attend college (and with the help of the Nation Blimp Scholarship Fund none the less) to major in Blimp History and minor in Blimp Education. Nothing excites me more than cracking open a dusty old book full of descriptions of the blimps and blimp related paraphernalia of yesteryear. John Kane’s famous “Blimp-Slip” for example, is something that we today might find comical, but folks in the 50’s thought was mind-blowing amazing.

Another reason, in addition to my love of blimps and my knowledge, and quest thereof of blimp history, as to why I should win your contest is my hope for the future of blimps. I lie awake at night thinking of a future where blimps rule the sky. A future were blimps are the only form of transportation. This may seem horrible to some of the blimp-enthusiasts who feel blimps shouldn’t be used by the masses. People who feel blimps should only be the play toys of the few. But it my world your everyday Joe will be able to take his family out to the blimp park and enjoy a lazy Sunday with his family, working class twenty-somethings will be able to take their girlfriends to the hover-in theater and cuddle with the illumination of Sylvester Stallone punching in someone’s face.

I hope this essay, my love for blimps, my quest for blimp related knowledge, and my enthusiasm for the future of the blimp have swayed you to crown me a victor of your contest. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and good luck with your contest. Live long and prosper my friend trough blimping and bassing.

2/10

 

[MakiSupaStar]

2/10

You're mighty kind.

 

[sloasdaylight]

You're mighty kind.

Meh, proper punctuation and use of paragraphs get's an automatic 2 points.

 

[MakiSupaStar]

Meh, proper punctuation and use of paragraphs get's an automatic 2 points.

What about his creative spelling of pretentious with a 'c'.

 

[username n/a]

DON'T HINDER MY CREATIVITY!!!!!

 

[MakiSupaStar]

DON'T HINDER MY CREATIVITY!!!!!

The only thing hindering your creativity is your own brain.

 

[username n/a]

YOU'RE MY OWN BRAIN!!!!!!!

 

[sloasdaylight]

What about his creative spelling of pretentious with a 'c'.

Frankly I'm just impressed he knows the word.

DON'T HINDER MY CREATIVITY!!!!!

I'd love to hinder your creativity, but the problem with that is that you usually need something creative in the first place to hinder. Without that, it's kinda rough.

The only thing hindering your creativity is your own brain.

Well stated.

YOU'RE MY OWN BRAIN!!!!!!!

Dear god...

 

[Simo98]

Well, here is mine:

Wormholes, Quasars, and Scale Airships (particularly for the purpose of child recreation).

Since the dawn of time, man has yearned for the skies. Many have attempted to ascend into the heavens; few have succeeded, but none more gracefully than those who pilot airships. Blimps, Zeppelins, Dirigibles, many are their names, but to us mere mortals they all mean the same thing… Flight

What is it that draws us to the skies, particularly via blimp, why do we long to sail amongst the clouds, petting the wild albatross like one would a dolphin from a sailboat? Maybe it’s our longing for freedom, the ability to go where we want, when we want. Maybe it is some kind of crazy primeval instinct, the yearning to be among the stars, or the clouds. It could even be a signal sent our by some far off extra terrestrial predators, luring us into their trap so they can feast upon our succulent human flesh without having to lift a finger, a signal blocked only by wearing some kind of head covering attire constructed from tin foil.

The truth is nobody knows. There is no scientific explanation, no chemistry hardwired into the brain, no genetic memory imprinted upon every human being or man ape during one cataclysmic event, simply no rhyme or reason for it, we just do. Ask any man, woman or child, I dare you, ask them if they want to take a ride on a blimp, ask them if they want to sail the skies, the answer will undoubtedly be yes.

Everyone wants to fly in a blimp, it’s a fact. This is why all children should be given the opportunity to sate this need, this yearning, at least once in their life. Or failing that be gifted with a delicately constructed scale model of a blimp, zeppelin, or other form of airship, preferably one that has being rubbed vigorously upon a trouser leg for a brief period of time, much like one would shine a cricket ball, as that they may experience the flight of a blimp through some existential means. The cricket-ball-esque shining of the toy blimp would simply be so that the child, or deprived adult, may develop a sense of familiarity, or possibly emotional attachment, with the kind person who would allow the receiver to experience this flying sensation.

Now while this may all seem to be a load of utter nonsense, I would like to point out the fact that this paper has being thoroughly criticized and endorsed by many high profile scientists and doctors, all of whom have an array of honorary degrees, along with PhDs acquired from a variety of world class online universities and cereal boxes.

Were a child to, hypothetically, fully develop into a functional adult without having at least some minor contact with a blimp (of one of the toy variety) then there is a high possibility of that individual being driven to sate their desire of flight through other means, often this has being show to have disastrous effects on the individual often resulting in plummeting to death from dizzying heights.

After years of scientific research it has being concluded that all children absolutely must be provided with a toy blimp. Without this core motor skills often have trouble developing and can cause drastic effects on later life, not to mention the high level of fatalities caused by falling. Legislation is already in place to ensure that all childcare centres have at least a single toy blimp per five children, however it may already be too late for those unfortunate individuals who have grown up without a toy blimp.

I have to admit im quite happy with my prize for second place, I could do with a toy blimp but the autographed picture, I think ill have to get it professionally framed.

 

[becker4567]

I have only one word to say about this.........."Huh?"

 

[Simo98]

YOU'RE MY OWN BRAIN!!!!!!!

Zing!

 

[MakiSupaStar]

YOU'RE MY OWN BRAIN!!!!!!!

 

[L-A]

Hey Maki, that guy looks a bit like you, no?

 

[lunarpollen]

Holy blimp of joy
casts shadows on the fearful
who flee in terror

 

[MakiSupaStar]

Hey Maki, that guy looks a bit like you, no?

Hahahaha. Now that I look at it, I guess that it does.