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Necks and Shoes......

The OP is making this much, much too complicated.

1) Go play some basses.
2) Try different brands and scale lengths.
3) Choose the one that feels good for your hands.

No lengthy analysis needed. You're an analog being dealing with an analog world. This does not create a problem that can be resolved with numbers. It is a qualitative, not quantatative, issue.

If it's hard to find variety, just play 34", 32" and 30" basses and see which feels best. That'll get you close enough that the rest will come with experience.

Myself, I'm 5' 8.5" on a good day and have hands that take "Large" gloves, (which I'm convinced is a pretty average size.) I can easily play upright and 34, 32 or 30-inch scales. I'm becoming more partial to 30" scales but that's probably because I'm a bit lazy. My 34" 1963 P bass isn't going anywhere.
 
A lot of this conversation should probably focus on the aspects of an instrument neck that can actually be measured. Check out Invalid Link Removed for an analytical look at the factors that contribute to the "feel" of an instrument's neck.

-Fingerboard radius
-Neck profile
-Neck with (both at the nut and the heel)
-String spacing (at the nut as well as the bridge)

I know some musicians who know very specifically which measurements work well for them and their hands. What it comes down to is that it's a process of trial and error. In my own case? A Fender "C" P-bass neck with a 1.75" width at the nut doesn't work so well for me. But give me a modern Precision with a B neck which is 1.625" at the nut? Or maybe even a Jazz neck which measures 1.5" at the nut? I know those necks will feel better in my left hand. As for fingerboard radius? A 7.5" radius fingerboard works for me, but I don't need those dimensions exclusively.
 
Well, to each his own, but I do find this a somewhat interesting topic. As people have been saying, getting a bass neck that feels right is not quite as straightforward as shoe size ... but then, neither is shoe size! I can't buy a pair of shoes online (unless I've already worn that exact model) because there are so many variables beyond the numbers. How long is the shoe's "tongue"? (I need a short one). How wide is the toe? (I need a wide one). How high is the heel? (I need a low one). Etc., etc. Same with bass necks - it is, if nothing else, a good analogy, even if it can't be captured strictly by numbers.

I need a bass neck with a narrow fretboard, a relatively thick depth, and a narrow string spacing (like the SX fiver in my AV). That's the guitarist in me - I've never met a bass fingerboard that felt too narrow. I've had the thought of converting a J Bass to a 5 string - though that might be going too far even for me ... but it might not! I suppose I should try out a Fender Bass 6, just because, though I've never actually seen one. At any rate, the neck, like shoes, is a very individual choice. Certainly not a one size fits all kind of thing, which was one of the OP points to begin with.
 
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I don't think it comes down to the "short scale vs. longscale" argument..

I don't think the makers can do a heck of a lot about the distance between frets really. Obviously that was thought of right from the beginning of the electric bass.

You need a certain distance between frets to produce accurate notes given the type of strings used on a bass....

Doesn't appear to be too much "wiggle room" on distance between frets..........maybe there is but I haven't seen any yet.......


I have seen some custom guitars that have "staggered " frets. But these are guitars not basses. The frets are angled on the neck instead of straight across.

How this helps or even if you could apply it to a bass I don't know.

"?
The distance between frets is determined by the scale length and can be varied a great deal. This is fretted instrument 101. 'Staggered' frets- you are referring to fanned frets? It's easily found on bass- most commonly associated with Dingwall.
 
I think discussing/arguing about this is probably kind of a waste of time, as some have suggested, but i also think it is an interesting question.

I wonder if a possible approach would be to determine a set of measurements for hands, wrists, forearm and overall arm length, height, etc., then have TB's measure themselves, and create a big data set. Another set of points would be to gather a data set about the basses those folks say are their favorites, and their least favorites with scale length, widths at various points, neck profile, neck radius, distance from strap pin to nut (both), distance from rear strap pin to bridge, etc.

Then, rather than debate, analyze and see if there is anything to learn? Maybe not, maybe so?

Just an idea, but i'd like to hear folks thoughts on the overall exercise, or suggestions on data points, etc.