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Need some help EQing my band...

My band is a three-piece prog/jazz fusion group. Bass, guitar, percussion (and we plan to start playing keyboards soon). It should be simple to get a good mix from a small group, correct?

In my old metal band, I discovered that rolling off my tone all the way and playing fretless with flats produced a sound that pleased me, as well as made me distinguishable from the rest of the band without cutting into their space. I found it wonderful that I could always be heard, and never cover up their sounds.

For my new group though, I need to figure things out. I discovered just a few days into jamming with them that I had to end the habit of rolling off my tone and only dominating the low, fundamental frequencies because now, I'm doubling as a source of basslines and chords. The guitarist is playing leads and melody 90% of the time, and I'm providing chords and counterpoint basslines.

The guitarist has an amazing Fender Mustang IV (V2) and I love the lead tones from it when the patches are right. And I have tools to manipulate my EQ through a graphic EQ on the amp, and an extra EQ on my multi effects pedal.

The problem is that during rehearsals or gigs, one of us is always dominating the other. I start with a flat EQ usually and just adjust as we go to find a good mix, and he has whatever EQ the patches on his amp come with. I want to find a mix for us.

This would be very easy to fix if I played the bass like a bass, but I play it more like a rythym guitar and play everything up to the 24th fret with chord extensions.

I know this question may seem simple to many of you (that is why I'm asking you of course), but I need some direction as I don't know very much about EQing and live sound.

So can you please give a suggestion as to how the guitarist and I should try EQing our amps?
Thank you
 
If you guys both have looper pedals you can mess with eq while you listen to yourselves playing at the same time.

Yeah, it's definitely harder to focus on the mix while you're playing.

Also, (I'm sure you know), your room is going to matter, and where you stand in the room will matter too.

So, I guess even if you guys do sit down with looper pedals, a small room rearrangement, or standing somewhere new might throw everything out. Maybe just keep jamming and doing little tweaks as you guys go.