Well another new one tonight... we finish rehearsal in which the guitar and I got into it again as he just cannot turn down... he actually offered me ears before he would turn down... anyway, I do all the gig management. Weve been booked for this Saturday for almost two months now. At the end of rehearsal I here the guitard and drummer discussing something and I sort of enquired and the guitard starts going on about his friends band is booked the same night where we're booked. Same venue, same stage and yes... same night. I ask him "and your mentioning this now and not two weeks ago when you found out?" he looks at me like the mental giant he is and says "Im telling you now, whats the difference?" all I could do is hang my head. There is literally so much bad crap that goes on with this guy it discourages me from sharing it as I just don't want to type that much... I know, I should run for the hills and when its not fun anymore its time to call it. Im hoping the drummer would step in and help but wishful thinking I guess. Been at this (trying to put a band together) for 3 years now. Hooked up with these guys 8 months ago or so now and honestly don't see how this can go on much longer before I end up in jail. So discouraging. There are quite a few projects around, all the players seem to know each other. Don't really care for the material most of them are covering. I actually know quite a few players that don't play anymore just because of this crap. Its not worth it to put up with the douch'ness.
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Not having fun any more
- Thread starter JaredBT
- Start date
Hook up with all the players "who don't play anymore because of this crap".
Right? ... whats a trip is the more I talk about it the more I get the feeling whoever I share it with thinks its because of me. Pretty funny really.
So the bar double booked for that night? Or your guitar player is playing in the other band as well?
Walk.
No poopy band bar gig is worth it.
Life's too short to put up with ********.
I've done it many times.
No poopy band bar gig is worth it.
Life's too short to put up with ********.
I've done it many times.
Na... our guitard knows a member of the other band, they were talking two weeks ago and realized we were booked the same night at the same place. He decided to share it just last night.
so whats the big deal? I have shared the stage with many friends, being booked the same place , same night. I dont see the drama here?
While I don't see what the problem here is, the bottom line is finding those you can work with, and herding cats.
Or getting a 6-string bass, some FX, a loop pedal, and a few percussive foot pedals...screw em all!!!!
Or getting a 6-string bass, some FX, a loop pedal, and a few percussive foot pedals...screw em all!!!!
To be honest, it might be worth giving a little serious thought to the question of whether it is indeed (at least in part) you rather than him. I'm not saying it is, of course -- I don't know you, or him, so have no idea -- but in your OP you seemed to be awfully upset about something pretty insignificant. Even if the reason for this is that you're fed up about a long history of (presumably worse) behavior on his part, it seems like now the problem might be that you're overreacting to things that shouldn't bother you so much. As I said, I don't know, but I think it would be worth thinking about before quitting in hopes that you'll be happier with a different group of guys.
This is just the tip of the ice berg with this guy.... i just didnt want to type for an hour or relive all the crap thats gone on.... its literally one thing after another... the main issue the other night was his volume, since Thurs eve hes gotten with the drummer and shsred how hes finally doing something about his hearing... coarse he shared it with the drummer and not me ... I'll take it any way I can get it honestly. Theres huge long history regarding all these topics with this guy.... Im not the only one tired of it.
Sure, I get the "tip of the iceberg"/"one thing after another" thing, but let's look at this latest "offense." Everyone has complaints about guitarists who play too *&$%*! loud. But from what you just said, this guy actually realizes that he has a problem -- with his hearing -- and is trying to do something about it. That sounds to me a like a good (and rare) thing, not a bad thing. It isn't clear to me what the guy did wrong, other than choosing to confide in the drummer but not in you. Again I'm afraid it sounds like you might be overly sensitive, in this case because you feel insulted or left out by not being included in a conversation.
On the other hand, if it's true that "I'm not the only one tired of it," then that certainly sounds like he is the problem. Are you certain that your bandmates feel the same way?
Oh yeah, the history is like a soap opera... its amazing. And, in retrospect its honestly not fun any more. We've been telling him his hearing is wrecking this this thing for 8 months now... he now gets a free check up in which hes told his hearing is done and he only now admits it. And not to all... im hearing this from the drummer so no telling what really was said or in what context. Thurs night He was going to suggest I wear ear plugs at rehearsal before he would turn down... then when I said no and flat asked him "so you're not going to turn down huh?" he gets childish, cups his hands around his mouth like a megahorn and says "no I'm not going to turn down" yelling in my direction. Yea, Ive been in bands previous where that guy would have been carried outta there after that.
Its dumb even why Im atill at this with this guy... honestly its because the drummer so good. But Im just kidding my self if I think this is gonna get better. Since 1990 this is probably band project 13 or 14... evey time its gone south its been due to the guitar player.
Kinda funny, we're jammin' with a guitarist tonight who we canned a couple years ago because he played through a 100w twin WITH extension cab FULLY CRANKED (it did sound awesome 
). He's now downsized to a 15w Vox, we'll see how that goes . He is super good, owns a beat up '67 Tele that he bought new drool.
But this would be active project #7 for me
.
). He's now downsized to a 15w Vox, we'll see how that goes . He is super good, owns a beat up '67 Tele that he bought new drool.But this would be active project #7 for me
.
I feel like I've got to give the guy credit for acknowleding that he has a problem and getting his hearing checked out. Maybe it was uncool for him to tell the drummer and not tell you, but it seems to me that the problem now is how to have a guy in the band who literally cannot hear himself unless he cranks up his volume. I kinda feel sorry for him, because it isn't clear what to do about this: He's a musician and he can't hear. Evidently he thinks the solution is that everyone will just have to live with his volume, but that's just not gonna work. Maybe he needs to stand directly in front of his amp, or use an in-ear monitor, or something. If you feel like it's time to give up on the guy, do it, but maybe there is a solution that will work for everyone if both you and he are willing to work at it?
buldog5151bass
Kibble, milkbones, and P Basses. And redheads.
It ain't paying your mortgage. If it isn't fun, either walk, or have one sitdown to see if it can be patched. If not, then walk.
Right. If it's paying the mortgage, you have to be willing to put up with whatever it takes for the show to go on. If it's mostly for fun, well, you gotta stop doing it when it stops being fun.
Sounds like a straw, but the proverbial one that breaks the camel's back. I quit a band, not for the same reasons, but the same kind of slow accumulation. It was a good group, then the guitarist fell off the wagon and started drinking again. His playing got more erratic, he would forget (lots of) intros to songs, and offstage behavior got more erratic as well. The final straw for me was when we played a county fair, gigs had been trailing off and hard to find and we were planning on it as a chance to really shine and show what we could do and relaunch. I'm pretty sure he had been drinking again (his son, also in the band, said he hadn't, but I could smell it), and was saying stuff to the audience over the mic between songs that was not appropriate for the family setting. Musically we weren't near as good as we had been in the past. I chewed him out for the mic comments afterwards, he got really mad and stormed off, and it wound up with me quitting. Just the one episode by itself in an otherwise good situation wouldn't have been reason to quit, but it was just how things had accumulated.
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