Playing is always frustrating

[TheBassWizard1]

What does your practice routine look like?

Do you have an organized and planned out practice regimen based around your weaknesses that you're looking to improve? Or are you just picking up the bass and noodling around aimlessly? An unstructured practice routine will make it harder to improve and leave would walking around in circles and frustrated every time...

 

[Ladyland]

Don't beat yourself up over this, playing bass (or any instrument) at an amateur level is supposed to be fun, not a constant battle with your conscience.

If he is a real friend he will put up with your limited abilities, in fact he may not even see them as such. The best players are (IMO) their own biggest critics and what to you may appear as gaping holes in your technique or abilities he may not even notice. So you have the makings of a great player as long as you can get over that hurdle in your mind.

Believe me this is true. The guitarist in our band has a habit of springing surprises on us for songs he would like to try. Some of them I have played before years ago or am reasonably familiar with and can drag the basics from the back of my mind within a verse or two but others I really struggle with. I cringe when I hear some of my efforts on the rehearsal recording. The guitarist and drummer are usually too busy with their own playing to notice and too polite to say anything if they did.

Yes, he is a real friend, my best friend and a boyfriend. I think that's why he doesn't hesitate to criticize me even if his words make me upset. Sometimes when I play with a backing track I think my playing is not too bad because I can already hit the right notes and keep a simple and steady rhythm. But when I play with my friend I usually end up crying.

 

[millsbass5]

I'll put it simply. You need a break. Take time off to stop and look for inspiration.

Or, try learning more by playing different styles of music. Hell, I'd quit and clear everything out if it wasn't fun anymore. Life is too short to be bummed out over something as petty as that. Hell, if you're gonna be bummed out, go buy a bunch of stuff you'd like to have and get in debt up to your neck. At least you'd have something to show for bein' so bummed. Suggestion? I hear the 2014 Dinan BMW S3R 1m is a sssmokin' car with well over 400hp. Now, THAT won't bum you out. I know, I done the same with a BMW M5. But, it's a bitch buying back tires all the time......

 

[INTP]

Yes, he is a real friend, my best friend and a boyfriend. I think that's why he doesn't hesitate to criticize me even if his words make me upset. Sometimes when I play with a backing track I think my playing is not too bad because I can already hit the right notes and keep a simple and steady rhythm. But when I play with my friend I usually end up crying.

That last sentence makes me sad. I am in agreement that a true friend can be honest with us, but it is because there is trust that they're doing it to help, not to bring us down. If he makes you cry then that raises a big flag, in my mind.

BTW, if you're hitting notes that work and keeping a steady rhythm, you're well on your way. At the same time, even when we can play more elaborate parts, these two things continue to be a work in progress. I still work at this daily.

Best Wishes

 

[delta7fred]

That last sentence makes me sad. I am in agreement that a true friend can be honest with us, but it is because there is trust that they're doing it to help, not to bring us down. If he makes you cry then that raises a big flag, in my mind.

BTW, if you're hitting notes that work and keeping a steady rhythm, you're well on your way. At the same time, even when we can play more elaborate parts, these two things continue to be a work in progress. I still work at this daily.

Best Wishes

+1

Playing should be fun. This cannot be overstated.

Guys can say things that gals take the wrong way without even realising it. My wife refused to talk to me for 3 days once for some hutful comment I must have made. I never did find out what I said (and never will now) but whatever it was it certainly was not intentional.

 

[Real Soon]

Thanks all for the excellent responses. I will take a break. As for playing with other people, I have given it a shot before but my social anxiety makes it more unpleasant than its worth - and I'm not really sure how to get past that

I'm a bearer of the cross of social anxiety, among a host of other dysfunctions and disorders.

So for me, it involved some beer and a few REALLY easy tunes with one or two other easygoing musicians who were also there strictly for the fun of doing some playing. After doing that a few times, I had the positive association of a relaxed, fun atmosphere going along with putting a bass on my neck, and that helped me pick up new, harder tunes without feeling stressed about it.

It wasn't long before I was up in the mountains near Ellijay, with one of those fellow musicians playing with a blues band. The bassist had an upright and had to take a break, so I got called up and did a few tunes in front of an audience on my first time playing upright on any songs at all. It was a great time and luckily, they had a few pieces of tape on the bass so I was even in tune (mostly).

 

[Ladyland]

That last sentence makes me sad. I am in agreement that a true friend can be honest with us, but it is because there is trust that they're doing it to help, not to bring us down. If he makes you cry then that raises a big flag, in my mind.

BTW, if you're hitting notes that work and keeping a steady rhythm, you're well on your way. At the same time, even when we can play more elaborate parts, these two things continue to be a work in progress. I still work at this daily.

Best Wishes

Thank you, Sir. Don't worry about me crying, sometimes I can be really whiny And it's not that HE makes me cry but it's an unpleasant situation that annoys me. I think I'm gonna look for some other people to play with. I want to try and maybe find somebody who is my level.