Putting this together is making me old

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by JaredBT, Apr 6, 2014.

  1. JaredBT

    JaredBT Supporting Member

    Aug 7, 2012
    Been tryin to put a Blues Rock project together for a year. Been doin it with a seasoned blues guitarist. It seems he has connections... its been a year now dealing with his vocalist and her seemingly lack of commitment (according to him though doesn't matter cuz shes so good). The real issue I will admit has been just been tryin to find a drummer. Ive put so much effort into finding one. Now I have a great seasoned drummer and now the guitarist is bailing. I cany believe it. Im pretty good at sensing situations and it seems as though when he hears how good the drummer and I are he gets the dear in the headlights attitude... almost like if its not him shining hes out kinda thing. Also he always seemed to shoot down the drummers I wanted to try, but if HE brings em in they can do no wrong till Im practically climbing all over him that they're not working. I don't know :scowl: Im sure this is just a situation that super seasoned players look at and just laugh cuz its a super common everyday occurrence. Now Ive got a great drummer possibly who has just come in and right away he's going to witness this thing fall apart when I promised him the situation was solid. Its just amateurish and sophomoric and I don't like being subject to some one being butthurt because the rhythm section is so good it shines too. Get used to being in a band right?
  2. FretNoMore

    FretNoMore * Cooking with GAS *

    Jan 25, 2002
    The frozen north
    Sounds like a situation we had many years ago with a guitarist who sounded all positive but as soon as we got near to forming a band, let alone booking gigs, there were all sorts of excuses and back-pedaling. Didn't like most new band members, suddenly didn't have time for a gig, etc. I think he really liked rehearsing with his buddies but didn't want to play live at all. Another guy I've played with, a keyboardist, didn't want to rehearse regularily and wanted to pick only certain gigs, so that didn't work very well either. Maybe it's something similar you've run into. I find a lot of guys are simply not flexible and tolerant enough to work well with others in a band.
  3. Hobobob

    Hobobob Don't feed the troll, folks.

    Jan 25, 2011
    Camarillo, CA
    I don't really have much to add other than my condolences. Sometimes things just fall apart at exactly the wrong time. Hopefully you can keep the drummer around until you find another, more committed guitarist.
  4. Yeah , putting a band together and KEEPING it together can be a pain in the butt. I don't know what the musical situation is in your area but if there are any places that have "blues jams" these are a good place to network and meet players. A lot of them might be looking to get into bands and you can get some kind of an idea what kind of player they are at the jam. Also , going to see other bands and talking to them might give you some leads. Just be sure to talk to them after they are set up or on breaks. Not when they are packing up!
  5. Nashrakh


    Aug 16, 2008
    Hamburg, Germany
    Look on the bright side: finding a good drummer is much harder than a good guitarist. If push comes to shove, look for a replacement and be done with it.
  6. JaredBT

    JaredBT Supporting Member

    Aug 7, 2012
    Its just so disheartening... since I picked it back up again 2 years ago Ive really been concentrating on getting my chops back. In my searching Ive had the pleasure of talking with some real seasoned older Guy players and they all say the same thing, that good bass players are like unicorns (hard to find). Wish I could find a project with good reliable (honest with themselves) players. This drummer is an older gentlemen, a pro, super connected in the area, we've only played twice. I hope he doesn't hold me responsible for this eminent jacked up situation. I wouldn't blame him though if he did. Im hoping (praying) he might say don't worry about it and have some other players in mind and away we go...
  7. JaredBT

    JaredBT Supporting Member

    Aug 7, 2012
    Thanks for the advise Shark. Youre totally right regarding the blues jams... I gotta find some. Kinda funny, that's how I found this guitarist, he was hosting open mics in the club he was the owner of at the time. He kept on asking me to come back and cover the bass night after night for a few months. The place went belly up due to his crazy partner and we kicked off this thing.
  8. Lobomov


    Aug 2, 2013
    'it's good to be The King' - Mel Brooks

    It is not that uncommon. Dunno if it is fear of getting exposed as a fraud, just fear of the unknown or just plain old narcissism. Wanting to rule.

    But as said: You have bass and drums down. Keep good terms with the drummer, go find a new guitarplayer. Seems like you want more than just rehaersing and hanging. I'm sure tou can face the drummer and just be open about the situation. You over estimated the guitar player. Sorry about that. Hope you are still here anyways and let's regroup :)
  9. obimark


    Sep 1, 2011
    There are people who want to pretend they are in a band, but when it is even remotely close to breaking out of their basement or garage and playing for an audience they self-destruct. Whether this is from fear or just a real lack of commitment I don't know.

    If you want to save yourself a LOT of drama in the future-follow my rule- if a project hasn't played out within 2-3 months, it usually never will.
    THat is the time limit I give any start-up band.

    I have seen this with several bands- one I booked a gig for, and the two guitarist got mad, because "WE Weren't ready!"

    PART II- gui****s are the EASIEST person to replace in any band- KEYS< VOCALS< BASS < AND DRUMS are hard to find, NOT gui****S.
  10. Nev375


    Nov 2, 2010
    Yeah, around here if you whack a tree real hard 3 or 4 blues guitarists will fall out of it.
  11. JaredBT

    JaredBT Supporting Member

    Aug 7, 2012
    Yep, sure enough. The guitarist and vocalist came down with "flu symptoms" at the last moment. :scowl:
  12. You mean to tell me that dealing with other musicians, especially guitarists, sucks a lot of the time? Next thing you'll tell me is that guitarists are flaky! Pshaw!
  13. Bunk McNulty

    Bunk McNulty It is not easy to do simple things correctly. Supporting Member

    Dec 11, 2012
    Northampton, MA
    I am reminded of auditioning for a country singer a few years back who was kind of a local star. I walked into her studio, and the first words out of her mouth were "I'm known for being difficult to work with." I looked at her and said "Y'know, this business is already difficult enough," and turned around and walked out.

    There is never a good reason to put up with that kind of nonsense.
  14. nukes_da_bass

    nukes_da_bass Banned

    Feb 19, 2006
    west suburban boston
    Guitarists are a dime a dozen. Put out a Craigslist ad and let the games begin.
  15. MrLenny1


    Jan 17, 2009
    Putting a band together from scratch is one of the hardest things
    you'll ever do.
    You gotta find the right combination and also people who really want to play.
    Good Luck
  16. a big ego in the music biz....the dickens ya' say....

    you're right but,being right is not always much help.....imho the best course of action would be to show what you wrote to the guitar guy,and let him digest it....it's probably the most articulate way you'll be able to present it to him,and if he's bailing anyway,what have you got to lose.....there is an outside chance that he might just get it,but i kinda doubt it.....

    i always think back to this guitar guy i used to know and what motivated him to play in the first place...was it music...nah....he just loved taking those l'il bitty guitar guy steps up to center stage and soloing away while flailing his hair in that guitar god sort of way....
  17. Nev375


    Nov 2, 2010
    I have never understood why people adopt some of their worst traits to to proclaim loudly and wear as if there were a merit badge for being a douchenozzle.

    To me that just says.. I know I have flaws but im too lazy and or Inconsiderate of others to try to be a better person.

    Is it that hard to say please, thank you, hand out a compliment now and then and say I'm sorry when you go over the line somehow?

    As for that last one. I can work with anyone if they are able to apologise and mean it when they start to get dickish. I dont expect perfection, just be a halfway decent human being.
  18. aggrokragg


    Dec 18, 2013
    Been there, done that.

    First band I ever joined didn't have its first gig for over 8 months because singer and one of the guitars couldn't let a song be finished. They kept going back to "fix things" to make them "perfect" and could never just tie a bow on something and move onto writing a next song.

    I didn't realize this was abnormal until my next band where the time from inception to opening gig slot was about 8 WEEKS. The vibe was totally different because everyone was psyched to go demo our songs in front of a live audience (even if it was a little bit raw).

    I'll drop the same advice as so many others have. Great drummers are way harder to find than guitarists. Also, if you're playing bass and looking to get your chops back, jamming with a great drummer will go much further to that end than with a guitarist. Hopefully you'll be able to do that until you round out the rest of your group.

    Good luck!
  19. these days the trend seems to be few rehearsals and into the clubs very fast....i recall spending a lot more time in the basement with the guys working out endings,little breaks and stuff and we never even dreamed of playing out until it was locked....and it paid off...no train wrecks,scarcely a missed note except a huge clang when a thrown ash tray bounced off a customer and hit the guitar guy's face on the rebound.... ...... i never imagined that anyone ever did it any differently until much later....
  20. ^ This was my experience when I started in the cover game, with the bands I ran. Working over parts until they were right.

    Sadly, most of the guys in that band were on the same page, I just didn't realise how lucky I was, let ego get in the way, didn't book nearly enough gigs and let it all fall apart when the going got tough.

    Then I decided to join other bands to "learn the ropes" and spent years shaking my head in disbelief. Boy was I dissappointed! I'm on my last cover band and if (when!) this one falls through Im back to running them.