None of us here are in your shoes.
And no offense, I don't want to be in your shoes in this situation.
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relationship question
- Thread starter ssbass
- Start date
None of us here are in your shoes.
And no offense, I don't want to be in your shoes in this situation.
She's still boinkin him,
Get out, but before you do be sure to Eiffel tower her with the other guy.
Don't invest any money, time or emotions into this girl.
the "no feelings for" line when talking about someone's ex doesn't exist in the real world.
I go to war every time my wife considers spending time with another man (solo not so much in a group).
"MY MEAT, STAY AWAY FROM MY MEAT, BECAUSE IT'S MY MEAT!" Is my general rule of thumb, jealous? yeah maybe but what can I say, aren't we all just dumb cavemen when it all comes down to it?
Get out, but before you do be sure to Eiffel tower her with the other guy.
Don't invest any money, time or emotions into this girl.
the "no feelings for" line when talking about someone's ex doesn't exist in the real world.
I go to war every time my wife considers spending time with another man (solo not so much in a group).
"MY MEAT, STAY AWAY FROM MY MEAT, BECAUSE IT'S MY MEAT!" Is my general rule of thumb, jealous? yeah maybe but what can I say, aren't we all just dumb cavemen when it all comes down to it?
BINGO! Cut and run, bro. You'll be better off in the long run, especially since it looks likely that she'll ruin her ex's marriage.
SS-
Let's put this in TB terms.
Bass for sale.. won't stay in tune, neck warped, pup's missing, but lot's of sudden bursts of volume.
I'd say take a pass on this one and find someone without so much baggage. Someone you're comfortable with without the struggle.
Let's put this in TB terms.
Bass for sale.. won't stay in tune, neck warped, pup's missing, but lot's of sudden bursts of volume.
I'd say take a pass on this one and find someone without so much baggage. Someone you're comfortable with without the struggle.
You know, when you put things in TB terms, everything seems so simple! Note to self: do this more often.
"She proceeded to tell him this and he flipped out, told her he didnt want to be friends anymore and he felt he didnt need to put up with that. Red Flag! So she starts an argument with me telling me i'm jealous and insecure and I cant tell her who she can and cant talk to. He is her best friend, hes like a brother, and hes like family. Bla bla bla. Red flag!"
Most men don't 'hang out' with women (especially exs), unless they have an ulterior motive. Seriously, when you want to go out and knock back a few beers, who do you go with, guys or women?
Women, somehow, do not understand this. It's probably not her fault, because they just lack common sense in this area.
If you have the will-power, try to act indifferent. The more indifferent you become, the more pissed-off she'll become. Women HATE indifference. They'd rather have you angry, because that shows them you at least care.
Most men don't 'hang out' with women (especially exs), unless they have an ulterior motive. Seriously, when you want to go out and knock back a few beers, who do you go with, guys or women?
Women, somehow, do not understand this. It's probably not her fault, because they just lack common sense in this area.
If you have the will-power, try to act indifferent. The more indifferent you become, the more pissed-off she'll become. Women HATE indifference. They'd rather have you angry, because that shows them you at least care.
Meat ?
No, we aren't all dumb cavemen about this, please don't try to justify your behaviour by trying to project it on other members of the male gender. I have known many women and men who were mature enough to still be friends after a breakup, especially when it was done on good terms and without kids, mortages or fooling around being involved.
Regarding OP, I don't think you are in the wrong if the ex doesn't want to see you and your girlfriend prefers ito stay this way. I have been buddies with some of my past girlfriend's ex boyfriends, but I have also shown the door to some who were still in love with the idea of getting their nose into the new relationship (ie. trying to cockblock me). Please to be seeing that tapping or sexual attraction had nothing to do with it, they jst wanted to make others feel miserable after their loss.
On the other hand, you sound hella insecure. As in, very much, and this translates into controlling behaviour. Do you really need to be around when your girl sees another man, even if it is another man that has already dipped his nachos in the grilled cheese ? Would you still find it appropriate if the girlfriend didn't
allow you to see other women when she wasn't around to check on you ?
If I were you, I'd start to think about cutting my losses, not that the girl is in the wrong, or whatever. Drama after 6 months never bodes well and yo are clearly uneasy about the ex still being around. Nothing wrong with admitting that. Plenty of other fishes in the ocean.
Didn't read most of the replies but I would be up front and say that the situation is making you uncomfortable. Whether that's because you're jealous or not doesn't matter, you're 30 years old and you aren't going to "learn to be comfortable" with it. Don't be offensive about it, and hopefully she wont get defensive about it. Tell her it makes you uncomfortable, and you want to work out a compromise of some sort that you can both be happy with.
If she's unwilling to compromise, then I'm sure you're old enough to know that it's never going to work out. Keep in mind that exact sentence for yourself too, be willing to compromise, just the whole situation sounds like a bus with no brakes to me.
If she's unwilling to compromise, then I'm sure you're old enough to know that it's never going to work out. Keep in mind that exact sentence for yourself too, be willing to compromise, just the whole situation sounds like a bus with no brakes to me.
