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Ridiculous Ways To Describe Tone

For sure, there is a lot of silliness. Self-described audiophiles are the worst, probably, but bassists do some pretty good damage of their own.

To me, the most regrettable descriptor is the word "tone".

Poor "tone". Over-stretched and over-used into practical meaninglessness, it is asked to mean everything and ends up meaning almost nothing. The music equipment industry is at fault partly. But in the end, musicians have only themselves to blame.

"tone" has become to musical nomenclature what "like" became to the conversational English language, a crutch supporting mental laziness in general, and the laziness of creative thinking, personal expression, and vital intellect in particular.
 
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For sure, there is a lot of silliness. Self-described audiophiles are the worst, probably, but bassist do some pretty good damage of their own.

To me, the most regrettable descriptor is the word "tone".

Poor "tone". Over-stretched and over-used into practical meaninglessness, it is asked to mean everything and ends up meaning almost nothing. The music equipment industry is at fault partly. But in the end, musicians have only themselves to blame.

"tone" has become to musical nomenclature what "like" became to the conversational English language, a crutch supporting mental laziness in general, and the laziness of creative thinking, personal expression, and vital intellect in particular.
DON'T you use that tone with me!
 
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I don't think anyone said this yet but "deep" lows is used fairly often around here to describe a sound with plenty of bass. I've also seen deep, rich, dark, used together fairly often. How about some "spine tingling lows" or "ball rattling bass"? Also have heard tones described as "complex" which probably means has some low to high mids mixed in.

Others that come to mind: sizzle, saucy, fiery, ethereal, raunchy, scabby, nutso, dirty, round, squared, opaque etc.
 
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This thread is really fun to read, specially as someone who regularly has to describe tone. I'm guilty of using expressions such as "creamy" "silky" "transparent highs" "bark", "honk", "biting mids" etc etc.....to me though they all make sense and most people I deal with seem to understand what the heck I'm blathering on about. :P
 
"Rhino farting in a trash can"

I remember reading this on some site about ZZ Top and thinking "This is EXACTLY what I want to sound like." I don't think this falls into the "ridiculous" category though. I think it is awesome.

Dusty was quoted as saying: "My sound is big, heavy, and a bit distorted because it has to overlap the guitar. Someone once asked me to describe my tone, and I said it was like a rhino farting in a trash can. What I meant is it's raw, but you've got to have the tone in there."
 
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How else, exactly, are you supposed to describe a sound in a written medium such as this online forum?

We know, for example, how an EB-0 with flats sounds compared to a Jazz with stainless rounds. But how would you put that into words?

Personally, I find those adjectives pretty easy to understand and relate to.