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Shorts...

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Wearing shorts onstage looks very unprofessional. Unless your name is Flea or Steve Harris, or Bon Scott or John McVie, you're going to look like an amateur.

Dude, I am an amateur. I am comfortable appearing like what I really am.

To be fair, I play bass in a rock band because it’s a fun creative outlet. Maybe if my livelihood depended on it my approach would differ.
 
...not only cargo shorts, but ANY shorts. Of course we're all in agreement that cargo shorts on stage playing music is abhorrent behavior, but are there any shorts at all that dudes over 50 can wear and not embarrass themselves? Not only gigging, but in general?

Just wondering what the bass playing intelligentia have to say on this. I know, random and weird. Thus, miscellaneous. Go:
You did not specify situational parameters that make all the difference. I've worn cargo shorts on stage in punk and metal bands, scenes in which formal dress would be considered abhorrent. If I was getting payed to play dance music at a professional event, no way would I wear shorts. When in my own element I'll wear whatever I want. Noone pays attention to the bass player anyway!
 
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Already 101° here in Augusta Ga. Banjobeque has 15 bands playing at Lake Olmstead today. Any guesses on how many will be wearing anything other than shorts?
If anyone is, it will be a result of stupidity or suicidal tendencies, NOT to conform to some silly idea of "looking professional".
We concentrate on being professional, not appearing so.
FBI agents and undertakers have to. We are neither.