Should I feel guilty auditioning for a second band?

[DavC]

i'd be open , honest and up front about everything .. ! ( the only way to be )

You have to decide which band has priority for booking gigs first .. ! keep a very current calendar for all to see and always have access to .

 

[Tom Howland]

I've play in multiple Band at the same time. The only real problem is if you are double booked on the same night.
I'm loyal to Band #1. in regards to gigs. And the other bands know, and except it.

 

[RoadRanger]

You have to decide which band has priority for booking gigs first .. !

I'm still seeing folks say that and have yet to understand how that is different than "first-come first-served"?

I should add that I'll also bump "normal" rehearsals for gigs and/or important pre-gig rehearsals and make that clear. Four of my projects rehearse/jam on the weekends (Friday night through Sunday night) so can get bumped frequently (one is just an
occasional jam, sometimes three months between - and has a second bass player sometimes. A second is usually a flea or farmer's market gig that is just a jam on standards and is really a duo with me sitting in on occasion, no big deal if I don't show).

 

[RoadRanger]

I've play in multiple Band at the same time. The only real problem is if you are double booked on the same night. I'm loyal to Band #1. in regards to gigs. And the other bands know, and except it.

So, you'll bail on a confirmed gig in band #2 if band #1 gets a gig?

 

[RoadRanger]

The point here is this: Some folks in get-together bands get all hurt if you're not totally devoted to their project. You just might find you've "quit" the first band. I'm sure you've considered this already.

I generally don't play with losers like that - no semipros would ever think that way. OTOH I don't mind "educating" the unwashed and generally it's others that are bumping our rehearsals for health or family issues . I'm pretty healthy for my age and mostly retired besides keeping house and looking after my youngest (7) when she's not in school - my wife works 6-3 weekdays so I have most nights and daytimes free.

 

[RoadRanger]

Dont tell the band about the audition. Dont feel guilty about it. If you decide to play in the second band, then tell the first band.

Yup. No need to stress them out about something that may not happen.

 

[Bodeanly]

Whether or not you audition for a second band, I would sit the first band down and voice your concerns.

 

[brianrost]

You should never feel guilty about checking out other band opportunities. Period.

Being in multiple bands is normal.

 

[Famuus]

I have been playing in my band for about four years now. Two years ago i told them i was going to advertise myself as a freelance bassist for other bands. I have been in a lot of short-term projects since and never had any problems.

Greetings

 

[Nephilymbass]

I am currently in one band and like it. Everyone in the band is nice and easy to get along with. We have been together since March. I do have a few frustrations though.
My main issue the singer has missed several practices. She is the guitar players wife and is an excellent vocalist. However, she doesn't have a background in rock music and is not familiar with a lot of the songs we do. So it is important for her to be there to get the vocals down. We have practiced without her on several occasions to work out music issues but it's not the same without having the vocals. I can understand things like family commitments and such getting in the way but she knows that we always try to practice around the same time and day of the week.
Because of this we still do not have enough material ready to play a full show. We have only done one gig, which was a only two sets so we had no trouble pulling that off. I am to the point were I'm ready to get out of the basement and start playing! I should also mention that the goal of this band is to only play once or twice a month.

So I found another band who is looking for a bass player. I talked to the drummer and it sounds like a great opportunity. They have a female singer/keyboard player, drummer, guitarist and a dedicated sound guy! They are doing a nice variety of material, and sound like they would be a good fit. I am supposed to meet with them next Saturday afternoon. I guess I'm feeling a bit guilty though, like I'm cheating on my first band. Like I said I really like the people and the music we are doing, I just want to play more often and get out and get going sooner! We have rehearsal tomorrow and I don't know if I should tell them I have an audition with the other band or wait and see what happens after next Saturday. I don't have a problem being in two bands if they are alright with it.

The big thing about this is just to be totally open about it with everyone. Don't sneak behind band A to play with band B. Be open and honest about its if you're availability allows you to do it without conflicts than go for it. One our our singers is in a different band as well. It's a very different type of band they aren't very busy and he's available enough that it rarely causes any conflicts. In the last year he missed one practice to play a gig with the other band. I work on my own music as well, trying to get into doing music for games and movies

 

[klejst]

You should not have to feel guilty about at least auditioning as a that point you currently do not have the gig/job yet, however if you do get it and already in another band then just make sure you're able to contribute a fair amount of time to both, if someone else has a problem with it confront them about it and try to work it out or do what you feel is best for you.

 

[BrianVengeance]

Definitely don't sweat it - it isn't an issue until its actually an issue. The only time I've really run into an issue with this outside of scheduling was due to maturity, and if just bringing it up causes issues then it may signify some other disharmony.

 

[tmdazed]

I am currently in one band and like it. Everyone in the band is nice and easy to get along with. We have been together since March. I do have a few frustrations though.
My main issue the singer has missed several practices. She is the guitar players wife and is an excellent vocalist. However, she doesn't have a background in rock music and is not familiar with a lot of the songs we do. So it is important for her to be there to get the vocals down. We have practiced without her on several occasions to work out music issues but it's not the same without having the vocals. I can understand things like family commitments and such getting in the way but she knows that we always try to practice around the same time and day of the week.
Because of this we still do not have enough material ready to play a full show. We have only done one gig, which was a only two sets so we had no trouble pulling that off. I am to the point were I'm ready to get out of the basement and start playing! I should also mention that the goal of this band is to only play once or twice a month.

So I found another band who is looking for a bass player. I talked to the drummer and it sounds like a great opportunity. They have a female singer/keyboard player, drummer, guitarist and a dedicated sound guy! They are doing a nice variety of material, and sound like they would be a good fit. I am supposed to meet with them next Saturday afternoon. I guess I'm feeling a bit guilty though, like I'm cheating on my first band. Like I said I really like the people and the music we are doing, I just want to play more often and get out and get going sooner! We have rehearsal tomorrow and I don't know if I should tell them I have an audition with the other band or wait and see what happens after next Saturday. I don't have a problem being in two bands if they are alright with it.

why would you feel guilty? You are not married to any particular band are you , seems to me a misplaced sense of loyalty. There is no reason(if you feel you can handle the work load) that a person cant play in more than one project. Myself , I play in a fun covers mash up type band that gets a ton of work, also an originals only band that spends more time writing and recording than playing live, I also create beats for hip hop type stuff and am getting into producing, I also do some TV extra work as well. I feel no guilt, why would I ? I dont sleep with any band , I didnt sign any non comp saying I could only play in one band , while I like the guys I play with , I dont live for (or hang out with much ) any other band member other than my son who plays in 2 of the projects with me ( who himself jams with other folks , contributes vocals on a few other guys rap projects, and prolifically writes in many genres). You do not need anyones permission or blessing to take anything else on, you have to look at things more clinically than emotionally

 

[hrodbert696]

So, you'll bail on a confirmed gig in band #2 if band #1 gets a gig?

Agree, not cool. Keeping your word and being reliable are the most important assets. If you say you'll play a gig, you play the gig - not pull out later saying, "Oh, sorry, my other band got a gig that night." The only exception would be if you got an offer to tour with Yes or something. Maybe not even then.

I generally don't play with losers like that - no semipros would ever think that way. OTOH I don't mind "educating" the unwashed and generally it's others that are bumping our rehearsals for health or family issues . I'm pretty healthy for my age and mostly retired besides keeping house and looking after my youngest (7) when she's not in school - my wife works 6-3 weekdays so I have most nights and daytimes free.

Yup. No need to stress them out about something that may not happen.

At one point a few years ago, I was trying to get a project started with a keys player/singer, which went months with no luck finding other members (that were acceptable to him, that is). Meanwhile I answered a CL ad and wound up joining another group, guys in the basement with no real experience but there was a full band and intentions to gig - it never really did, though, apart from one open mic trainwreck. I never felt the need to talk to them about the project with the keys player, not that it was any big secret, just that it never came up and didn't seem relevant. So after a while I'm in a music store with my wife and one of the guys from this second band comes in. We say hi and I introduce him as the guitarist from the Manchester band. He gets this look on his face and stares at me and says, "You mean THE band. I'm the guitarist from THE band."

 

[MrLenny1]

I have a similar situation.
Rehearsing with one band 9 months and only one gig. They have issues to work out.
Did an audition for a working band and got the gig. I have not pulled the plug on band #1 yet.
Do the second band without telling the others.
Weigh all the pros & cons then tell band #1.
If you wanna work you can't wait around in this business.

 

[interp]

I play with four or five bands and almost never turn down offers to do one-off casual gigs. Who ever is first on my calendar for a given date gets my services. No one has a problem with it.

 

[RustyAxe]

Guilty, hell no. But ... playing in multiple projects will invariably cause schedule conflicts somewhere. Have a plan to deal with it.

 

[1954bassman]

I really cannot see why folks are saying not to tell your band mates? Why wouldn't you want to be upfront and honest. Wouldn't all of you people expect that from your band (he said they are all friends).

 

[Volunteerk9]

I went through this same thing last year. I was, and still think of myself as a weekend warrior.

Band A was rehearsing and not playing out. When they did play out it was for little or no money. Joined Band B as a sub, just to play out more, but eventually became full member. I get $100 per gig. Also joined Band C as a sub, was offered the slot, but declined.

I think I'm in those same bands! I joined Band A thinking that an every week practice would lead up to consistent gigs. Band A is stale - we're playing the same songs now (an ecclectic mix of obscure, off the wall, dance floor clearing songs) as they did when I started and only a handful of shows played. Band B has a pretty good following, pays well, and seriously knows their stuff. Ive subbed for Band B a few times now. Each time that I have and then hit the practice day for Band A, its getting more and more awkward feeling. By all means go for it, but be prepared for the potential hurt feelings.

 

[Joe Nerve]

I really cannot see why folks are saying not to tell your band mates? Why wouldn't you want to be upfront and honest. Wouldn't all of you people expect that from your band (he said they are all friends).

I think if he tells his band mates before anything actually happens, he's opening the door to possible bs that's completely unnecessary. It could only serve to complicate things, and it really isn't anybody's business but his own. If the band works out with the other people than it would probably be a good idea to tell them, but not necessary unless a conflict presented itself.

What good would telling them do if he's not even in the other hand yet?