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Sick of being a quitter
- Thread starter DaDrew2112
- Start date
I'm sorry but this is really bad advice with a bad analogy. I have been diagnosed with ADD/ADHD after assuming I had it for years. Yes, it does make things more difficult, but it's just another obstacle to over come. ADAPT AND OVERCOME should be your mantra. Plenty of people with ADD/ADHD have been more successful than their peers in their chosen area who didn't have the disorder. Michael Phelps has ADHD, I hear he's a decent swimmer and won a few gold medals.
Not an ADD/ADHD individual, but an example of someone overcoming a major obstacle. Oscar Pistorius lost his legs. He could have sat around his house feeling sorry for himself and using his "reason" as an "excuse" but he didn't.
http://abcnews.go.com/Sports/oscar-...le-amputee-sprinter-compete/story?id=16929845
Will Smith is ADD/ADHD. Whether you like him or not is not the question, he has been successful as a R&B/Hip Hop Artist (whatever you want to call it), and as an actor. His ADD was so bad as a child, he had trouble reading books. Nowadays when he reads, he reads along with a tape. Adapt and overcome.
Sir Richard Branson - his ADHD really held him back. He only started a record company, made more money than God then bought an island.
Terry Bradshaw - football player, won a few Superbowls. Another who overcame his mental disorder.
David Neeleman - founder of JetBlue
Jim Carry, Pete Rose, the list goes on and on.
You know what your problem is, and you have acknowledged it. That is a big step in the right direction. To combat your ADD, you need write things down. You and I more than anyone else needs to create mini-goals. You need to set aside a time every day to do something to work towards a mini goal. Every day. Induce habit. Create a habit. When things get boring, stale, etc, you need to shake it up. Add something new to the mix. Shake up the routine, change the routine, but keep working on those smaller goals. If you are not confident that you can overcome it on your own, why not see a Dr. I was prescribed Vyvanse for my ADD/ADHD but I didn't like the side effects of it and I lost my creative edge. Don't let the ADD be an excuse or reason to fail or be unhappy in life. It's definitely a disorder you need to respect regardless of the negative attitude that some people have towards it. Just know that It does have it's perks and advantages which is why you see so many artist or athletes with it. Hyperfocus, compassion, and creativity for example. I've noticed that we ADD'rs tend to look at the world differently. Adapt and overcome.
I think that ADHD is bull crap, what did people 40 years ago do? They learned to control themselves! 2 of my kids were said to have adhd and were put on those pills, after a year I puled them off from them and just told them that you have to have self control, learn to notice the adhd when it starts effecting you and you can correct yourself without pills! When my son starts getting a little out of control because of his ADHD I tell him, and make him think and settle down on his own, we dont just let it go because he has this illness that almost every kid in the USA has now...I think lots of kids that get diagnosed with ADHD are just out of control kids that need discipline, but it is easier to throw Meds at them! This is all IMO though and is working for us.
This would be a good idea. Have your goals displayed on a board that you will see often. This way it will constantly remind you of what you need to do and you can't avoid seeing it. Also, just remember that what you are achieving is important. It is easy to fall apart when you don't remember what the end result you want is. If you keep thinking about what you want achieve, you will be more motivated to do it. And probably the most important thing to do to keep with something is to make a schedule, or at least schedule a specific time every day for that one activity. That way you have a set amount of time where you know you got to do something.
Unrepresented
Something Borderline Offensive
Get some gym buddies. Take a community guitar class. Gym buddies helped me get to the gym and helped me stay competitive when I was there. Rec centers and community colleges will offer guitar classes that will allow you to network with other enthusiastic players for a limited cost and will get you some legit learnin' while you're there.
I agree. I remember as a 1st grader that I was "hyperactive" as they called it back then. It was brought up by my teacher and my parents would remind me before school and over a period of time I was better. A person has to practice it over a period of time to see results . Sound familiar ?
I think the scheduling idea is great too. It's something I've began to work on, but I'm really going to go for it now. Thanks for the replies guys, I'm going to be ditching loserville for sure!
Yes it does!! My son tested high enough to be put in an all honers school (4th grade), we toured the school and at lunch damn near all the school ran up to this table in the middle of the hallway where this nurse was handing out ADHD pills. I could not believe what I was seeing. One week after my son started the teacher calls us in and tells us our son has ADHD because he finishes his work fast and then has spare time and chews on the sleeve of his shirt, and sometimes taps his pencil. We let him take these pills for a short time until I got really tired of seeing him after taking his night pill fall face down onto his dinner sleeping. I put a stop to it right there, taught me and him how to deal with it without pills and he is now 18 and as normal (whatever that is ) as anyone! it is BS IMo
It's way overdiagnosed, but there is still a legitimate amount of individuals who have this. I was one of the many "diagnosed" by a preschool teacher back in the day. I maybe have a slightly active imagination and waste time on TB, but that's about the extent of it.
Have a big goal, break it down into smaller goals, break that down into a smaller set of goals. Start getting to those goals.
lowsound
lowsound
I think there's a bit of misunderstanding about my original post. I'm not saying that people with mental conditions can't achieve. They can, but it's also okay to ask for help. That's how you can adapt - by getting the help required. If Oscar Pistorius didn't have his prosthetics, he wouldn't be running. So, by the same token, if you don't get your mental health condition treated, then life is going to be a lot harder.
I do believe ADHD exists. I know people with it, and if they don't take their medication, then they are a mess. When they take their medication, they're fine and functioning. I also had a ex who refused to get his ADHD treated - and he was the most disorganised person I have ever known. He couldn't plan, he couldn't budget, he was impulsive as all hell and he had a quick temper. Is it overdiagnosed? That's possible, but even that still doesn't discount the fact it exists.
I do believe ADHD exists. I know people with it, and if they don't take their medication, then they are a mess. When they take their medication, they're fine and functioning. I also had a ex who refused to get his ADHD treated - and he was the most disorganised person I have ever known. He couldn't plan, he couldn't budget, he was impulsive as all hell and he had a quick temper. Is it overdiagnosed? That's possible, but even that still doesn't discount the fact it exists.
Set really tiny goals, one or two every day.
The old saying "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." is accurate, but I like to add to it "....and there's a s**t-load of little steps that you take."
Tiny goals accomplished is way better than lofty ones not.
The old saying "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." is accurate, but I like to add to it "....and there's a s**t-load of little steps that you take."
Tiny goals accomplished is way better than lofty ones not.
Right now I can tell you from ongoing experience that you'd better follow these tips if you want to lose body fat (not sure if that's what you mean with getting in shape):
1) First and foremost, get a nutritionist you've heard good things about, and be mindful of how (s)he treats you. (S)he should encourage you, not preach you.
2) Chances are you're eating more carbs (regardless of whether they're whole-grain or not) than your body needs. Fruits included.
3) You will achieve weight loss more efficiently by changing your eating habits (base diet on veggies, lean protein and water, plus controlled amounts of carbs and good fats) than with exercise alone. Do both, of course.
Admittedly, each body behaves different with body fat loss and levels of physical activity also differs, but I bet this can help the average man to effectively lose body fat. It's working for me, and I'm going with a wonderful nutritionist that also made my sister lose that extra fat, and she looks great and feels great
Bottomline, I agree with another poster that said you are better off reaching your goals with support from a trusted person, be it a friend or professional. Someone that motivates, encourages and guides you.
I second the idea in bold. Acknowledging your triumphs and advances, as small as they might be, changes your mindset. Makes you appreciate yourself and the moment.
"Today is a gift. That's why it's called the Present" -Master Oogway- Yeah, I know. It sounds corny and is from an animated movie but it rings so true to me now.
1. Small, achieve-able goals. Goals that you can reach in clearly defined amounts of time. If your goals are overwhelmingly large - they may be prohibitive. For example: losing 50lbs can be overwhelming & take a year to accomplish in a healthy manner. But you CAN lose 1-2lbs per week. That is 52 lbs in one year.
2. Success - When you achieve your smaller goals - realize your success. Success builds on itself. For example, did you just lose a pound? Awesome. You aren't done yet, but you are on your way. Finish one assignment of one class required for a graduate degree? Cool. You are that much closer to completion.
3. Positive thought. Believe that you are capable of accomplishing your goals. When they are small, it is easier to believe that you can accomplish them (e.g., knowing you can lose a pound this week, finish the next assignment, etc.). Work on not doubting yourself.
4. Surround yourself with encouraging people & those who have accomplished similar things. For example, if you want to be a great runner - go on runs with someone who runs faster than you, but who is patient with your progress (don't call up Usain Bolt for a quick jaunt), but you get the idea.
5. Expand your goals and work to achieve the new goals. After you have success with small goals - make the goals bigger, or include new goals that are larger. Some objectives are more difficult than others. For example - losing 50lbsof weight is relatively simple (not easy) - eat less, exercise more. Winning the local 5K race for your age bracket is a little harder (requiring running at a pace you might not have yet). In terms of education - if you earn an undergrad degree - why not make it a masters or a PhD?
What are you trying to get done?
Some things are just going to take lots and lots of hard work to get to. "Playing competent jazz piano", for example, is going to take years of good solid effort.
Our western culture doesn't incline us to being patient with things. We want stuff to happen quickly.
It is also very hard starting something, because it is no fun sucking at something. So, we quit. But, in order to excel, one must push through. That's a healthy skill in and of itself.
Some things are just going to take lots and lots of hard work to get to. "Playing competent jazz piano", for example, is going to take years of good solid effort.
Our western culture doesn't incline us to being patient with things. We want stuff to happen quickly.
It is also very hard starting something, because it is no fun sucking at something. So, we quit. But, in order to excel, one must push through. That's a healthy skill in and of itself.
I believe that lack of self discipline is because your self esteem is too high. Many information and successful atheletes/ musicians/ artists come to you and you want to be all of them, and your interest hop from here to there.
This is my personal experience, and I sometimes still change my interest very often and I always have to remind myself to stop that. without a certain amount of time on a particular topic or things, the result will certainly not come up. Like Every great player, when you have lesson with them, will ask you concentrate on basic, even though you can already a very good player.
If you have certain thing solid, you can do other thing convincing even though you are new to it. Be patience....
This is my personal experience, and I sometimes still change my interest very often and I always have to remind myself to stop that. without a certain amount of time on a particular topic or things, the result will certainly not come up. Like Every great player, when you have lesson with them, will ask you concentrate on basic, even though you can already a very good player.
If you have certain thing solid, you can do other thing convincing even though you are new to it. Be patience....
This.
Try something that also involves other people. Then you aren't just into the activity, but also making and keeping friendships.
Tempering something into a habit is also a strong point for people who stick to things.
It's way overdiagnosed, but there is still a legitimate amount of individuals who have this. I was one of the many "diagnosed" by a preschool teacher back in the day. I maybe have a slightly active imagination and waste time on TB, but that's about the extent of it.
Re - ADHD, this ^ .
These responses are very helpful. Yesterday I got off my rump and went to Brazilian Jui Jitsu class for the first time in two years. Although it was tough walking in knowing that I had just tucked tail and run before, it felt really good training on the mats. Since I already am a blue belt, my next goal is going to be getting a stripe. I also have to give it some time as I'm completely gassed really quickly. I'm also going to be shooting for first degree in Muay Thai.
Nice work building up some positive thoughts and momentum. I'd caution you to be careful about setting too many goals too far into the future. It's great and all to be looking forward, but given the history you shared with us, you may be setting yourself up for failure if you are overly aggressive.
But yeah, good job bro. Keep on keepin' on.
-Mike
But yeah, good job bro. Keep on keepin' on.
-Mike
