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Sigh. Drummer trouble.

#142
Limpingbass said:
what a jerk.

On the other hand, I guess that's better than making you feel bad for letting him go.

Man I wish I caught the videos before you deleted them on myspace!
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I'd put them back up, but...I don't want it to hurt us, trying to get jobs, when someone says, "Oh, I saw them on MySpace, and they sucked. Some kind of weird rhythm problem." If there was some way to put them up so that only TBers could see them...?

After we've had the new drummer for a little bit and he's gotten tight with us, I'll make new ones that won't suck. LOL!

Yeah, it is nice to not feel bad about him anymore. Nastiness coming from someone you are trying to help is a sure way to get rid of guilty feelings!

Cherie
 
#143
Jumpin' in late but all of this sounds eerily familiar. What is with those guys? How can there be such a disproportionately high ratio of dysfunction in one narrow segment of people? Anyway, sorry I missed the videos. If you can put them up somewhere private lemme know, I'd like to see them.
 
#146
vinny said:
Jumpin' in late but all of this sounds eerily familiar. What is with those guys? How can there be such a disproportionately high ratio of dysfunction in one narrow segment of people? Anyway, sorry I missed the videos. If you can put them up somewhere private lemme know, I'd like to see them.
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I'll see what I can do about the vids.

This is the most dysfunctional musician of any stripe that I have ever worked with. And I've encountered some real doozies.

Oh well. We'll see what happens this weekend. I have not heard from anyone, so I guess I'll just show up for the gigs and see who is behind the kit.

Cherie :bassist:
 
#147
Since you've got another drummer lined-up & will pay him, just use him instead. The other guy "quit" & then reconsidered. After all, you're probably gonna bounce him anyway. Why not now? That way you won't be paying two drummers & you'll have the better of the two on stage.

Maybe drunk..er..drummer one will hear drummer two & get a clue. Well...maybe not but you still wouldn't have paid two drummers.
 
#148
vinny said:
Since you've got another drummer lined-up & will pay him, just use him instead. The other guy "quit" & then reconsidered. After all, you're probably gonna bounce him anyway. Why not now? That way you won't be paying two drummers & you'll have the better of the two on stage.

Maybe drunk..er..drummer one will hear drummer two & get a clue. Well...maybe not but you still wouldn't have paid two drummers.
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I agree. Guitarist is in Houston all week. I've sent him an e-mail, asking him whether or not he's arranged for the new drummer or not. If he hasn't done so, I've offered to do it. 's gotta be done. If he's not going to, I've got to.

Cherie
 
#149
txbasschik said:
He thinks I should play the part differently every time, and that is the way to keep things interesting. He says I am boring.
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I'm sure it keeps things real interesting for your front, who has to play guitar and sing over what would easily become a constantly shifting one.

Maybe that's what makes things interesting for your dummer, but I'm auditioning next week for a newly reformed band that broke things off initially because they had a drummer like your individual. Well band leader found a drummer that knows what it means to be consistent and in the pocket, and since I had sent him mail saying that I played bass, and was sorry to hear he was breaking it up, I get the first chance to audition for the part, with new, skilled (apparently) drummer, after the incumbent bassist stated he was moving on.

Bandleader and I had a talk for over an hour the other night about how important it is for the drummer to play what your drummer calls 'boring' parts. Bandleader says he'll never play with another drummer who can't play the same parts, consistently. He wants a bassist who can match those 'boring' parts with the same amount of consistency and pocket playing.

Sounds to me like boring is in, for bands that want a solid groove.
 
#150
Line-up the new drummer and show up early with them to be sure the kit is in place etc. When the tool shows up, tell him you all figured he'd quit judging by his 'tude at the previous show. If he pitches a fit, then just say: "well, then you're fired." No fuss, or explanations required. The more you attempt to justify your choices to the dysfunctional, the more you leave yourself open to a public scene.
 
#151
khaspir said:
I'm sure it keeps things real interesting for your front, who has to play guitar and sing over what would easily become a constantly shifting one.

Maybe that's what makes things interesting for your dummer, but I'm auditioning next week for a newly reformed band that broke things off initially because they had a drummer like your individual. Well band leader found a drummer that knows what it means to be consistent and in the pocket, and since I had sent him mail saying that I played bass, and was sorry to hear he was breaking it up, I get the first chance to audition for the part, with new, skilled (apparently) drummer, after the incumbent bassist stated he was moving on.

Bandleader and I had a talk for over an hour the other night about how important it is for the drummer to play what your drummer calls 'boring' parts. Bandleader says he'll never play with another drummer who can't play the same parts, consistently. He wants a bassist who can match those 'boring' parts with the same amount of consistency and pocket playing.

Sounds to me like boring is in, for bands that want a solid groove.
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It drives our front *nuts*. Especially when the song being butchered is something that he wrote. Its maddening.

Oh, congrats on getting the first audition to join a band with such a good drummer!!! Oh, break a leg!!! :hyper:

Like you, I want a nice pocket. Fills should be tasteful, not all over the place, and consistency is vital. "Boring"! Nah!!! That silly old Drummer is incorrect. The correct term is "groovy"!!!

Cherie :bassist:
 
#152
bigfatbass said:
Line-up the new drummer and show up early with them to be sure the kit is in place etc. When the tool shows up, tell him you all figured he'd quit judging by his 'tude at the previous show. If he pitches a fit, then just say: "well, then you're fired." No fuss, or explanations required. The more you attempt to justify your choices to the dysfunctional, the more you leave yourself open to a public scene.
Click to expand...

Whether we get it done before this weekend, or whether we do like you say, which is highly likely, it just has to be done. We can't have this stuff anymore. We gotta make it like a bandaid and just rip it quick.

I'd really prefer that it happen before this weekend. The gigs we have are important for the band.

Saturday, we are filling in for the band that cancelled for the band that cancelled. Ayyyyup. We've been trying to get into this venue for months, and they are giving us this one chance. They pay well. We must *not* suck.

The other gig is a Superbowl party. A big one. They rented a big park pavilion with huge BBQ pits, and a huge tv. We play all afternoon, then they have the dinner and the party. It will pay very well. So...we must *not* suck.

We *must* have the good drummer!

Cherie :) :bassist:
 
#153
Spoke with Guitarist. He says we will use old Drummer for the show on Saturday. The Superbowl gig has been cancelled.

He says I should not try to contact Drummer in any way, and spend my energy working on new material and looking forward. Evidently, Drummer is very good friends with Guitar's extended family, and this thing has turned into a horrible mess for Guitarist. He's also concerned that if Drummer becomes angry and ugly toward me again, he might do something stupid. Or my husband might do something stupid to the Drummer.

So...Guitarist will deal with it himself when he gets back to town. We will book no more dates until this Drummer is gone. When I wake up on Sunday morning, I want to ***know*** that he is ***gone*** from our band.

Cherie
 
#155
txbasschik said:
Evidently, Drummer is very good friends with Guitar's extended family, and this thing has turned into a horrible mess for Guitarist. He's also concerned that if Drummer becomes angry and ugly toward me again, he might do something stupid. Or my husband might do something stupid to the Drummer.

So...Guitarist will deal with it himself when he gets back to town. We will book no more dates until this Drummer is gone. When I wake up on Sunday morning, I want to ***know*** that he is ***gone*** from our band.

Cherie
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Ouch.

I trust it will get dealt with, though? That sounds like a bit of a mess all unto itself. Best of luck with it, and best of luck on the show.
 
#156
txbasschik said:
He says I should not try to contact Drummer in any way, and spend my energy working on new material and looking forward. Evidently, Drummer is very good friends with Guitar's extended family, and this thing has turned into a horrible mess for Guitarist. He's also concerned that if Drummer becomes angry and ugly toward me again, he might do something stupid. Or my husband might do something stupid to the Drummer.
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I'm sure that this must have crossed your mind, but it's quite possible that the person who leaves this band may be... you?

I recently quit a band with similar issues. While waiting for the "problem person" to get his act together or leave it suddenly dawned on me that he wasn't going anywhere. And even though the other members seemed as bent as I was, the overall dysfunction of the group was as important to them as the music - maybe more so. This was a revelation to me.

I hope this is not your situation, but your last post indicates that it may be.

Cindy
 
#158
Hey Cherie, could you use an old fart?

gmh-drums1.jpg
 
#159
CindyB said:
I'm sure that this must have crossed your mind, but it's quite possible that the person who leaves this band may be... you?

I recently quit a band with similar issues. While waiting for the "problem person" to get his act together or leave it suddenly dawned on me that he wasn't going anywhere. And even though the other members seemed as bent as I was, the overall dysfunction of the group was as important to them as the music - maybe more so. This was a revelation to me.

I hope this is not your situation, but your last post indicates that it may be.

Cindy
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Well, no, I hadn't thought about that. We're only a three-piece. I know the Guitarist can't take anymore of this Drummer...its making him nuts, and since he has to travel so much, he has no time for b.s. If he wanted to get rid of me, too, I think he'd just break up the group and start over.

I do think, however, that he may be using someone else to record with. The bass that Guitarist lent me so that I could use it for gigs (he likes the sound) has been taken back home, as has his pre-amp and all the other gear that belongs to him. He says he wants to experiment with sounds/tone for the recordings. He's not having me do it, so I'm guessing he's got someone else.

And, you know, it kinda doesn't make that much difference to me, really. Not anymore, after all this drama. I have two other bands forming up. If this doesn't work out, there's always another band. I got an offer for a really good gig down in Austin the other day. I'm not worried. ;)

One thing I can count on...its not so easy to find a working bassist who isn't three bands deep already, around here. If I'm out of work, it won't be for long.

Thanks for the POV! I really hadn't considered it. But it bears thinking about.

Cherie :) :bassist:
 

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