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Singing and playing...HELP!

Bass and vocals is hard, much harder than the typical rhythm guitar strumming + vocals that a lot of lead singers get away with ... I don't know if this will help, but there's a trick I use when learning a new song on piano, which has a similar issue (right and left hands with very different parts). As per others above, learning each separately perfectly is essential: esp. with the bass, get to where you can play it without even thinking about it much - even go so far as to let your mind wander as you play. Then work on putting them together VERY slowly, to see where the rhythms of notes in each part line up and where they don't. Get used to thinking of yourself as either playing and singing notes at the very same time - which should be easy! - or playing and singing at different times - which should be easy! - then it's just combinations of the two - which should be easy! :D Finally, and back to piano for a sec, when one hand is doing something more complicated than the other, I tend to look at that hand, but then still "hear" the other hand (that I'm not looking at) in my head. I'm not sure of the science of it, but it's like I'm engaging the visual parts of my brain for one and the aural parts for the other, rather than trying to do two different things with just one part of the brain, if that makes any sense ... In your case, perhaps looking at (or just feeling) the bass part, purposefully trying NOT to hear it (so it doesn't lead your vocals astray, which you mentioned is an issue), and hearing the vocal part, would work similarly for you and your brain.
Hope that helps, and good luck!
Interesting approach with the looking, but not hearing/being distracted! Don't know if I could separate the two adequately to do that, but could be fun to try!
 
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Another approach I have found helpful: Simplify your basslines when you practice your singing. Make them really easy, just the chord changes, just quarters. When you can do that perfectly, start to make variations on your basslines. One step at a time.
I like that suggestion as I am already simplifying some lines as it is, but not adding variations afterwards.
 
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A big thing for me was finally letting go of the identity "really good bass player" when singing. I had to put the bass on autopilot (as others have said) and face the fact that I might mess it up here or there while delivering the vocal. The vocal is going to be the focal point for the audience (like it or not) and that's where your energy and attention must go.
There's also a big difference between singing some background harmonies and singing lead. To sing lead, you have to powerfully "sell" the song, and that means proper breathing, posture, dynamics, enunciation, attitude... it's not easy.
Jack Bruce was my favorite singing bass player. He COULD actually "tell a story" with his bass while simultaneously doing some virtuoso singing.

Thankfully, I'm only doing backup. I guess my goal has always been to get that bass killing it and the idea of sacrificing that in terms of vocals doesn't feel right, but you're absolutely correct, to the audience, the vocals are more "impactful", for the most part, than the bass.
 
About 8 yrs ago I joined a Beach Boys tribute - didn't give it much thought. I can play fine, and I can sing in tune. What a shock. My workflow was they gave me the show songs, old bass player and his vocal on right channel, the rest of the band on the left. I learned the bass part first, and once I had it in my head I started on the vocals - and in our case, we pretty much sing through every song - so I had to treat my line as a new melody. I found that when I'd try really hard on the vocal, often my fingers would stop! I also realised that over the years I've developed the bad habit of needing to see my fingers - had a actually gone up the neck the right number of frets, but while singing my head is up and I cannot look down. So my bass playing technique had to improve so I can for the main, play blind. If we add a new song, especially one where I take the lead, I find that it speeds it up to play a simplified bass line - even to the stage of playing just the root of each chord, until the vocal beds in, then the bass line can develop while the vocal autopilots. I find now that all I need is to be secure with the first couple of notes the bass plays, and then it plays itself. With backing vocals, something kicks in and I'm there for those sporadic BV songs - although if I concentrate on the bass line, and perhaps try to be a bit cleverer, I find the vocal comes in late!

It is something that just needs practice and more practice.
 
I sing backs only, no leads. I've used many of the suggestions here at one time or another. One thing I'll add is that when I practice playing songs at home, I often sing the lead where there is no backs to maximize the amount of singing and playing i do together. Get better faster.
 
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I have tried and tried for years to sing while playing. I can only do very limited amount of singing and only on songs with sustaining notes that allow me to not think as much. lol. I don't understand why it's so damn hard, but it is for me for sure. I admire anyone that can do it. The drummers that can do it are the most impressive.
 
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That is just horrible. I heard it on a song on the radio (college radio) a few weeks ago, and it really just sounds like “I can’t harmonize but want to sing anyway.” Just ruined the song.
It's funny, a while back between projects, a bunch of buddies and I were playing. All pretty serious musicians except our singer who was, for all intents and purposes, tone deaf, but didn't care and just loved to be in a band. It became a situation of "It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt", well our fun and games ended when the singer talked about playing live and none of us felt that that would go over well with his singing. Suffice to say, it ended badly with lots of hurt feelings. Which was disappointing, since it was fun up until that point, but clearly not everyone was on the same page.
Sadly, the number of bands playing gigs and recording that really shouldn't be is ridiculous. Some of them do quite a few gigs and you wonder how word hasn't spread about how bad they are...maybe society as a whole is becoming a bit more tone deaf overall.
 
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For me it's a matter of making the playing a background task ... ie; know the material so well that I don't have to think much about it, leaving me to focus on the vocals. As for harmonies, if you can hear (or imagine) the chord progression, try creating an alternate melody over those chords. If you're careful to avoid doubling the melody notes, you'll have your harmony part.

THIS IS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!!!!!
 
To me, the bass and vocals are both very monolithic. Probably coming from the same side of the brain. In order to sing, I have to make my bass playing mechanical, not thinking in terms of notes or rhythms. Then, I can think about pitch and rhythm in my vocals. I do have to simplify the bass lines. I don't have this problem on any other instrument
 
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If you really want to give your brain a workout, sing while playing fretless! I just started practicing that, and it's a whole new ballgame. Keeping two different "instruments" at the correct pitch simultaneously. Fun times.
That's interesting. I've found it much easier to sing while playing double bass than while playing electric bass.
 
I sing backing vocals and one or two leads. What I do is learn the bass part first, then map out exactly where each word of the vocals lands in that bass part, note by note. And I'll practice it very slowly, line by line, until I can feel how they go together. Had a bunch of songs that seemed impossible to play and sing suddenly make sense that way. But there are one or two songs I've still had to say I can do backing vocals or play the bass part, but not both. Something about the rhythms of the bass part and the vocals just feel incompatible to me. Interestingly, in our band the vote has been to put the bass first and drop the backing for those songs. I still hope something will click and I'll be able to sing those ones too.
 
Hey Dream, thanks for the pointers. So, by focusing on harmonies instead of melody that should help so that singing and playing don't conflict? A lot of the background vocals that I've done have been harmonies, but I still would run into issues trying to play and sing at the same time.
No, I don't think this is your issue. If I read you right the problem is when a BG vox line is rhythmically different than the line you're playing on the bass. Don't worry, this is something we all go through.

The only way is to slow things down and figure out exactly what's going on rhythmically at the moments that give you trouble and then practice practice practice.

The issue for most people is coordinating the right hand with the voice (if you play bass right handed). I used to tap out the rhythm of the bass line (i.e. each pluck that I have to execute with my right hand) on the edge of a table with my right hand while singing the line, to get the physical feeling of the odd moments where BG vox don't match bass line.
 
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That is interesting. I would think that would be even more difficult. Someday, when I can afford one (and find space to keep it) I'll have to try that too. Double bass is on my bucket list for sure.
I would have thought so too, but it turned out I was wrong. It probably has at least something to do with playing much simpler lines on DB. Very often it's just quarters and simple syncopations.
 
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