Stories About Weird Groupies

[mrjim123]

This thread is about weird groupies, not about weird stories about groupies (unless the groupies themselves were weird ... am I making sense?). So, there's gotta be some kind of psychological twist, and keep it clean, please.

OK - here's mine. It was 1979. God, I miss those days - before AIDS, when I still had a LOT of lead in the pencil. I hooked up with a groupie who only liked bass players. Don't ask me why, but that's what she told me, and if she ever gave me a reason I've forgotten what it was.

She actually lived with a bass player in another band. Whenever I played in her home town and her "boyfriend" was gigging out of town and gone for the night I would always end up going home with her (I was a bit of dog ... back in the day ).

Then there was the one who said she really preferred drummers. I lived with her for 3 months. Golly gee, Bill, if she had liked bass players we might have even gotten married!

Enough about my sordid past. Your turn.

 

[crack-boom]

 

[Honk'n_down-low]

I would get Banned if I posted my stories here.

 

[mrjim123]

Well, my story was from 1979. Cameras weren't even invented yet!

 

[Fetusyolk]

A guitarist from a band i used to be in had this one girl that randomly became infatuated with him. she always wore a pink sweater. she somehow found out his birthday adress, and phone number. one day she called him and asked what he was doing, and he said 'hanging up'.

I guess she's more of a stalker but i dont see any harm in her actions.

Nowadays if she approaches us in any fashion, we immediately stop what we're doing and stand in freeze frame. She usually gets confused and walks away within 3 minutes.

 

[gibsonbassist45]

groupies are just...haha.
well its at least nice to know that you older guys actually could do it back and the day and NOT catch anything...
today's groupies just make me laugh.
oh yeah and they are NOTHING like what they were back then


i dont really have to worry about it though.my lead singer was the only one in my band to ever have a groupie,who stalked him for a couple of weeks.and god knows if he had caught anything from anyone cause he drinks consecutively whenever he gets the chance so hes always to drunk to pay attention probably.i wish i had stories but,thats as weird as it gets for me

 

[MirageBass]

You're assuming that we get groupies. =P

 

[CheeZit]

Well, from the large number of groupies that I, as a bassist, gather every night

. I have my guitarist, who is a lesbian, help me pick out the best one.

 

[kesslari]

in a reggae band years back, other than the types of groupies discussed above, we had "reggae" groupies - not so much sexual as would follow the band and do things for us - one was a caterer and always laid out a spread of food out in the parking lot for us after the gig.

 

[GearHeadBassMan]

You're assuming that we get groupies. =P

Here's an example where a great profile pic can enhance the joke.

Ok, here's a story about weird groupies. Played a show at a nice theater and the crowd really liked us. There were two girls sitting in the back of the room during soundcheck and I made the normal amicable small talk. They were right up in front of me the whole night, not really even moving with the music but just intently watching me... a little freaky.

Anyway, post show they come up to me oogling about how good we were. I'm trying to go through post gig organization so I'm kind of half talking to them, not really paying attention. I'm wheeling my rig back to my car when I notice they are following me. I ask them where they're going and they respond with this gem:
"wherever you're going."

hmm. Now, it might help to mention that both of these girls were (like most of our fans) underage, and since at the end of the day, my brain controls my actions, I did not have carnal illegal things happen.

To this day they still text me every once in awhile, the way I see it is, hey, they're fans right!

 

[Alcyon]

Well, from the large number of groupies that I, as a bassist, gather every night

. I have my guitarist, who is a lesbian, help me pick out the best one.

Wouldn't you guys fight over it?

 

[CheeZit]

Wouldn't you guys fight over it?

Sometimes, but she wasnt too much into groupies, or stalkers, that had accumulated by the end of the night. But she is more then happy to help me choose

 

[Slax]

Oh god, horrible story. While I was in my old ska band we had a groupie from a nearby town that LOVED US... or me for that matter.

Turns up a few months later she was so "into me" that she put me as her profile picture on some blog site and had random pictures of me. She was definitely some sort of stalker. I never spoke to her, my GF at the time gave her the house kicking of a life time... (which I can can't say I approve).

Long story short, at the time, I was 18-19 and she was 12-13... innocent crush, on her part, that was unsettling to me. After my ex-GF ripped her a new one, she vanished. (Thank god)

Still, who wants a pre-teen stalker!?! Not me!

The one thing I'm happy about since that band, is that in my new band, we now get fans our own age.

 

[Obe]

in a reggae band years back, other than the types of groupies discussed above, we had "reggae" groupies - not so much sexual as would follow the band and do things for us - one was a caterer and always laid out a spread of food out in the parking lot for us after the gig.

Band reads this. I turn treble down and bass up and start learning reggae. One guitar player reinstates his dreadlocks. Sober other guitar player returns to smoking. Band changes name. Advertising for drummer continues, with food instead of money listed as compensation.

Heh, great find!

 

[spunj13]

my band has had "problems" with very strange girls posting pictures of assorted members of us (meaning : our vocalist or guitarist) on their myspaces with titles like "my future ex-husband" and things like that.

both our vocalist and guitarist have had internet stalkers... and now our guitarist has started egging them on by giving some of them strands of his hair (this JUST started, and we don't know why). the most unfortunate thing about his is... we're all 21 and over (21, 23, 25, 27) and a lot of these girls are 15 to 18 or so... *shudders*

one fifteen year old girl (who lives 2 hours from us, near where we play about once every couple months) was telling people that she was going to sleep with our 25 year old vocalist. at this point she had told him she was 18 and then after talking to him for a while, he got the "crazy" vibe off of her and stopped talking to her, and then found out that she was [a] on house arrest and 15 not 18.... she has pictures of him posted all over the place... it's just... weird. very weird.

[spunj13]

 

[ghostjs]

Well, my story was from 1979. Cameras weren't even invented yet!

lol how tragic!

 

[kesslari]

Band reads this. I turn treble down and bass up and start learning reggae. One guitar player reinstates his dreadlocks. Sober other guitar player returns to smoking. Band changes name. Advertising for drummer continues, with food instead of money listed as compensation.

You just made my day...

 

[Eric Perry]

I have a few great stories from back in the day. I was a filthy, filthy boy!!!!!!!!!

 

[Obe]

You just made my day...

No problem Kesslari, glad to help!! Getting off topic, but I remember a gig where we got paid in hot dogs, and got to take home the extra buns. GROUPIE CONTENT: but our singer took home the good kind of buns, and then shortly later had to see a doctor, then we wrote a song about it. She was not too happy when she heard it, but we didn't mention her by name.

 

[MatticusMania]

Here's an example where a great profile pic can enhance the joke.

Ok, here's a story about weird groupies. Played a show at a nice theater and the crowd really liked us. There were two girls sitting in the back of the room during soundcheck and I made the normal amicable small talk. They were right up in front of me the whole night, not really even moving with the music but just intently watching me... a little freaky.

Anyway, post show they come up to me oogling about how good we were. I'm trying to go through post gig organization so I'm kind of half talking to them, not really paying attention. I'm wheeling my rig back to my car when I notice they are following me. I ask them where they're going and they respond with this gem:
"wherever you're going."

hmm. Now, it might help to mention that both of these girls were (like most of our fans) underage, and since at the end of the day, my brain controls my actions, I did not have carnal illegal things happen.

To this day they still text me every once in awhile, the way I see it is, hey, they're fans right!

Just wait til theyre legal age and then.... threesome!