Have you heard the old joke about the comedians' convention?
They're professionals, so they all know every joke ever told. To save time, they've catalogued and numbered the jokes. Instead of telling the whole joke, now they can just call out the number.
A good joke never gets old, so everybody still laughs. Unless of course the person who calls out the number just can't tell a joke, and then it's heckling, rotten tomatoes, etc.
Anybody feel like starting a talkbass numbering system (TNS) for recurring topics? I don't think we have to bother with numbering the inevitable responses. Let's just let the topic numbers themselves evoke the whole "Groundhog Day" experience.
Please no opinions or taking sides. I just want a numbered catalogue of topics, which can either be used to start new threads, or for efficient replies such as, "Good one! TNS #438!"
Who wants to go first?
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TNS, version 1.3 (issued September 10, 2016 at 20:09 UTC-5:00)
They're professionals, so they all know every joke ever told. To save time, they've catalogued and numbered the jokes. Instead of telling the whole joke, now they can just call out the number.
A good joke never gets old, so everybody still laughs. Unless of course the person who calls out the number just can't tell a joke, and then it's heckling, rotten tomatoes, etc.
Anybody feel like starting a talkbass numbering system (TNS) for recurring topics? I don't think we have to bother with numbering the inevitable responses. Let's just let the topic numbers themselves evoke the whole "Groundhog Day" experience.
Please no opinions or taking sides. I just want a numbered catalogue of topics, which can either be used to start new threads, or for efficient replies such as, "Good one! TNS #438!"
Who wants to go first?
----
TNS, version 1.3 (issued September 10, 2016 at 20:09 UTC-5:00)
| TNS # | Post # | Question or Answer |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | 2 | best bass for metal |
| 2 | 2 | cab mixing |
| 3 | 2 | why does x-brand cost so much |
| 4 | 2 | squier sire sx mim just as good as MIA Fender |
| 5 | 5 | tube watts VS SS watts |
| 6 | 5 | Class D lacks weight in the notes |
| 7 | 5 | tonewood VS --- |
| 8 | 5 | High Mass Bridges for sustain |
| 9 | 5 | Rickenbacker Customer service |
| 10 | 5 | 18" Cab for LOWS, 410 for HIGHS |
| 11 | 5 | NEO speakers don't sound as good as Ceramic |
| 12 | 5 | my homemade road worn, relic job. Will it increase the value? |
| 13 | 7 | Rickenbacker Love/hate |
| 14 | 7 | Tone woods |
| 15 | 7 | Craigslist stories |
| 16 | 9 | Do I need a 5 string |
| 17 | 9 | Jaco only needed 4 strings |
| 18 | 9 | "best" _____ |
| 19 | 9 | forget everything else, get a Precision, with Tort, and flats: it will work for ALL styles of music. |
| 20 | 9 | Tort pickguard needed. |
| 21 | 9 | Underpowering speakers |
| 22 | 9 | Guita-ds |
| 23 | 10 | P vs. J |
| 24 | 11 | Rounds vs. flats. |
| 25 | 11 | If you could buy any bass.... |
| 26 | 11 | Guitar Center stories... |
| 27 | 11 | Best cab, amp, bass, etc. for $200 or less... |
| 28 | 13 | NBD |
| 29 | 13 | NAD |
| 30 | 13 | NCD |
| 31 | 13 | NPD |
| 32 | 14 | Slapping is overrated/overdone |
| 33 | 15 | Fire the drummer! |
| 34 | 16 | Should I quit? |
| 35 | 16 | Band drama |
| 36 | 16 | Our singer wears sweatpants |
| 37 | 17 | Your rig doesn't need to reproduce the fundamental |
| 38 | 18 | Why didn't this come with a box? |
| 39 | 20 | Grabbing my popcorn… |
| 40 | 21 | Boiling strings |
| 41 | 21 | Same name as another band |
| 42 | 21 | Need a band name |
| 43 | 22 | Rage quit |
| 44 | 23 | Can you tell me what bass this is... |
| 45 | 24 | Carrots |
| 46 | 25 | 5 vs 4 strings. |
| 47 | 25 | Fretless lines vs unlined |
| 48 | 26 | 4 strings was good enough for <famous player> |
| 49 | 26 | Anything you can play on a 4 you can play on a <number bigger than 4> |
| 50 | 27 | “The decal was sanded off ages ago, it's a refin, replacement pickups, the serial # is way off, but the seller swears it's pre-CBS.” I should buy it, right? |
| 51 | 29 | Synth bass needs its own sub forum |
| 52 | 30 | Looking for a transparent overdrive |
| 53 | 30 | Which compressor should I get? |
| 54 | 30 | Should I get a compressor? |
| 55 | 30 | What's the point of a compressor? |
| 56 | 30 | How can I get that Wolstenhome/Burton/Geezer/etc. sound? |
| 57 | 30 | Is there a difference between the new Morley wah and the old power wah for that Cliff Burton sound? |
| 58 | 30 | What Rat/Big Muff/OCD clone is best? |
| 59 | 31 | What order should I put my pedals in? |
| 60 | 75 | I've never played a short scale bass, but here's the reasons you shouldn't (buy, trade for, play, build, etal) one either. |
| 61 | 31 | What's a good DI? |
| 62 | 31 | How do I get over that SABDDI mid scoop? |
| 63 | 32/99 | Is Pastorius overrated/underrated? |
| 64 | 33 | Oatmeal |
| 65 | 34 | Do I really need effects? |
| 66 | 34 | Fender color choices |
| 67 | 34 | Show us your __________ basses |
| 68 | 35 | Insert cat picture here |
| 69 | 37 | Knowing theory takes away from creativity |
| 70 | 45 | Which number would be good for metal? |
| 71 | 36 | Effects vs tone in the fingers |
| 72 | 36 | Pick vs fingers |
| 73 | 40 | Q: I don't tour, have never recorded an album, have no social media presence, don't really have a band, and my day job is in IT - how do I get an endorsement deal? |
| 74 | 40 | A: {It’s self-evident that I’m not qualified to answer, but …} |
| 75 | 40 | A: {I have a perverse inverse ratio of endorsements to actual talent, and …} |
| 76 | 43 | Band member wants their significant other to sing or manage the band |
| 77 | 43 | Pay to play? |
| 78 | 43 | Band member gets too drunk |
| 79 | 43 | What gauge string to use for dropped z flat |
| 80 | 43 | Do I need a P bass? |
| 81 | 43 | Are boutique basses REALLY worth it? |
| 82 | 46 | I, IV and V are the only numbers that matter |
| 83 | 47 | Bigger speakers = more bass, right? |
| 84 | 47 | Can I use my bass through a guitar amp? |
| 85 | 47 | My active bass with a 5 year old battery is distorted, do I need a new bass? |
| 86 | 48 | Should I mix driver sizes in a pair of cabinets? |
| 87 | 48 | If it sounds good, it is good |
| 88 | 48 | Won't sound as good as two of the same cabinet |
| 89 | 49 | Should I wear shorts? |
| 90 | 50 | Why do people like the thing that I don't like? |
| 91 | 50 | Why all the hate for <thing or person that is actually quite popular and not hated by many> |
| 92 | 51 | What does GAS mean? |
| 93 | 53 | Don't buy ______. Just learn better technique. |
| 94 | 54 | Passive vs active |
| 95 | 54 | Best flatwounds |
| 96 | 54 | Top <number> bassists |
| 97 | 55 | I want to be a bass player but I also want to pick up chicks at our gigs. Should I switch to guitar? |
| 98 | 56 | FWIW… |
| 99 | 56 | IMO… |
| 100 | 56 | I'm going to read the first post only and reply with my own story |
| 101 | 57 | Is this Craiglist Ad legit? |
| 102 | 57 | Why the hate for Ebay? |
| 103 | 57 | What's the best short scale? |
| 104 | 58 | Back story....... |
| 105 | 58 | Issue with drummer |
| 106 | 58 | Issue with singer |
| 107 | 58 | Issue with singer but she's hot |
| 108 | 58 | Guitarist said...... |
| 109 | 58 | Emergency Tab request |
| 110 | 58 | Flats are better |
| 111 | 58 | Round wounds are better |
| 112 | 58 | Boiling strings |
| 113 | 58 | Refrigerator rig vs combo |
| 114 | 58 | Mic vs DI |
| 115 | 58 | Wearing shorts on stage |
| 116 | 58 | Does this bass make my butt look big? |
| 117 | 59 | I just bought a new bass - what is it? |
| 118 | 59 | I want to play <musical style y>, will <bass x> be ok for that? |
| 119 | 61 | Tone woods - can you hear the difference? |
| 120 | 62 | Tort...........… |
| 121 | 65 | modern music sucks |
| 122 | 65 | modern music is awesome, you just have to look for it |
| 123 | 65 | can X band still call itself X band with no original members? |
| 124 | 65 | the Rock and Roll Hall of fame is a joke, why haven't they inducted X band yet? |
| 125 | 65 | Covers vs. originals |
| 126 | 65 | ASCAP is evil |
| 127 | 65 | @BassCliff plays with/for a lot of babes |
| 128 | 65 | @elgecko/@sneha1965 photoshops a TBer into funny scenes |
| 129 | 65 | @S-Bigbottom posts a picture of a cat |
| 130 | 65 | @slobake complains about tuna noodle casserole |
| 131 | 65 | burrito |
| 132 | 65 | Scooping mids |
| 133 | 65 | don't scoop your mids |
| 134 | 65 | tell me the music video my band shot with our camera phones is awesome |
| 135 | 65 | groupie accidentally sleeps with bass player |
| 136 | 65 | everyone talks during a bass solo |
| 137 | 65 | bass could also mean a fish ha ha |
| 138 | 65 | why are there so many kinds of metal? |
| 139 | 65 | are expensive basses really worth being expensive? |
| 140 | 65 | which female bass players do you most like to drool over? |
| 141 | 65 | please do not discuss politics in the thread I started on an inherently political topic |
| 142 | 65 | playing popular songs sucks my soul into the dark pit of gehenna |
| 143 | 65 | I'm having great fun and making good money playing popular songs. |
| 144 | 66 | Which tort for this finish? |
| 145 | 67 | How will I remember which number relates to which topic? |
| 146 | 68 | One spot left, help me to decide what pedal to put in my pedalboard |
| 147 | 69 | This thread will be locked before one day |
| 148 | 69 | IBTL |
| 149 | 69 | Popcorn munching GIF |
| 150 | 70 | Is this a Chinese fake? |
| 151 | 70 | Should I buy this Chinese fake? |
| 152 | 71 | Help me indentify this fake fender |
| 153 | 72 | Sorry to bring back this thread but… |
| 154 | 72 | {Just respond as if the last reply was yesterday and not yesterdecade} |
| 155 | 73 | Bass Player Magazine |
| 156 | 74 | I'm an agnostic towards tonewood |
| 157 | 77 | Jeff Berlin kerfluffle |
| 158 | 78 | Just grab yourself a Fender Rumble and a Squier VM jazz |
| 159 | 78 | Place it on a step ladder because you don't have ears in your knees |
| 160 | 78 | Stuff a foam block under that new set of La Bellas |
| 161 | 78 | Tie a fishing weight or two to the rear strap pin to alleviate neck dive but make sure to to use a scale to weigh the entire contraption and get an accurate weight-based resale value |
| 162 | 80 | I did a search but… |
| 163 | 81 | What are ohms anyway? |
| 164 | 82 | Thump! |
| 165 | 84 | First bass, what do you think of this: '63 Fender on ebay for $5000 with tonewood and white pickguard, shipping from chinese pawn shop. It's assembled in America so I know all the parts will be perfect or I'll chew the crap out of the CS guy until I get a manager. I have a 4ohm rumble 2x10 and an 8ohm 15" which I plan on using with my hybrid guitar amp rated at 100W peak @ 8ohm max, parallel the cabs right? Will I be able to get Justin Chandlers tone with flats on E and A and round Cobalts on D and G through a behringer pitch shifter that came without a box? Never played bass before but the band I'm trying to get into says play it like the studio version and I cant read tabs so should I play in drop D all the time or scrap the Fender for a boutique 5 and carry a capo? Its all todays music and we havn't landed any gigs so I've got time to make up my mind. Perhaps Ill just mod the Fender by adding a string and adding a neck extension for the 24th fret. With this bass can I think I can fire the drummer after he loses his GF to the guitarist. Please answer my question directly so we don't get off topic. |
| 166 | 85 | Best OD |
| 167 | 85 | Best Synth Pedal |
| 168 | 85 | Best Compressor |
| 169 | 85 | What effect is this |
| 170 | 86 | Show us your ______? |
| 171 | 87 | #11: What's the best amp volume level for metal?, #4: How many strings are there on a Fender Mustang Bass?, #10: What size speakers should I put in my cab?, #1951: When was the first P bass made? {Note: Specific numbers were requested, but I haven’t yet seen if they conflict with other special requests. #69 omitted just because.} |
| 172 | 88 | Do I really need a compressor/which compressor is the best? (automate TB to insert a link to Bongo's website as first comment) |
| 173 | 89 | I'm just a little bored today |
| 174 | 94 | Help me choose my next bass... |
| 175 | 94 | Help me choose my next amp... |
| 176 | 94 | Help me choose my next cab... |
| 177 | 94 | Help me choose my next OD pedal... |
| 178 | 94 | Stock answer in effects forum to question of how to get a certain specific tone on a recording that you shouldn't use effects "because I never have" and that one is somehow a lesser being for having used effects... |
| 179 | 94 | Stock answer in amps forum on exactly what flat response means and how to arrange a music store to achieve perfectly flat response when trying out new basses yet admitting the fact that it would sound like poo and to just set the amp's knobs to mid positions... |
| ... | ||
| 411 | 93 | I didn't read the entire thread but...(#) |
| ... | ||
| 420 | 60 | Lead guitarist syndrome |
| ... | ||
| 665 | 64 | Mothman |
| 666 | 97 | What's the best bass for Polka? |
| ... | ||
| 911 | 90 | What's this thread about again? |
| {infinity} | 79 | {post that does not need to be read because it wastes an infinite amount of time} |
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