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Throwing in the towel tonight....

#64
electracoyote said:
1. Resign with dignity and professionalism. Give notice, offer to cover a couple of gigs on the books.

2. Maintain your standards. I like them.

3. Find some musicians who share your standards and discuss these issues before hitching your wagon to them. You're an audience-centered musician. I call those types "entertainers." Find some entertainers next time. They're out there, you may have to look a little longer and harder, but it's worth it.

Good luck.
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Excellent advice here, IMHO/IME.
 
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#69
Hopkins said:
A "for the fun of it band" with a band leader is never a good idea IMHO. I would have had serious words with the guys taking money while I got nothing for my efforts.
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+1

Fortunately here in the UK BLs are few and far between. Most bands at the weekend warrior level are a democracy of sorts*. In the last 47 years only one had a BL and that went south pretty quick.

Money is usually divided up equally after expenses (promo material etc) have been deducted.

We all do what we are good at, drummer hustles for gigs. I record rehearsals and distribute the edited songs, and maintain the gear, Guitarist comes up with most of the songs (he sings the most but we can all suggest songs especially if we are prepared to sing them) does the setlists, manges the social media and promo material, and records and produces demos.

* In my current band we all sing lead so if you want to sing something the others are happy to let you.
 
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#70
never liked band funds ... i always got a loan and charged the band rent for My stuff ( pa/lights/truck )


i like slightly obscure older tunes ... But they must be danceable ... !!! maybe mixed into short medley or sandwiched between a couple strong dance tunes .. !!

if you know how much the band has made , and you should , ... give them a bill for your share .. !
 
#71
Regarding BLs, I'm very grateful for my current gig. The BLs (the guitarist and singer are the founders of the group) handle bookings, own the PA, and haul the PA to the gigs. They're cool people to work with, and totally professional.

And everybody gets an even cut of the pay.

As I said, I'm grateful to hold the bass chair in this act.
 
#72
Ewo said:
Regarding BLs, I'm very grateful for my current gig. The BLs (the guitarist and singer are the founders of the group) handle bookings, own the PA, and haul the PA to the gigs. They're cool people to work with, and totally professional.

And everybody gets an even cut of the pay.

As I said, I'm grateful to hold the bass chair in this act.
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Have to say, I'm quite envious. Lol
 
#76
Ronbeast said:
When I quit the band, I would have taken everyone who has the same mindset as you and just left. Cut the bandleader and the crappy drummer, reform the band and get back out there.
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With last nights after gig heated discussion, that is very likely going to happen. Even our guitarist, which is a very laid back guy and rarely says anything flipped his lid. I think last night was just the breaking point for everyone.
 
#77
Milo's said:
You're far too nice to a group of people who are clearly too self-absorbed and ignorant to reciprocate. This isn't a salaried job where you owe anyone notice.

The golden rule went out the window when the other members decided it was a good idea to steal money from you by not paying or misappropriating band funds to buy gear or settle their own bar tabs.

The drummer's wife would make me walk alone. Dealing with annoying significant others is out of the question.

I'd tell them all to screw and not feel bad at all. They will just find another poor bass player to walk over, and if they can't, screw them all still. Life is too short to deal with morons, their spouses, progeny or anyone else who is inconsiderate enough to handle themselves with so little decorum. Good luck.
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OP certainly has cause to resign, so it's kind of redundant to outline it yet again.

Burning bridges is one way to make an exit. Some folks don't care about the potential for repercussions down the line. Some folks do. I'll leave it to OP.

One thing can't be denied: OP joined this band hastily and should have been more aware and asked more questions. Failing to do so, he has to accept at least a small part of the responsibility for the misunderstandings. "Punishing" the band by rage quitting doesn't seem appropriate to me. Those guys have a system, and as dysfunctional as it may seem to most of us, OP dived into it head first and accepted it for 18 months.

Again, YMMV. If burning bridges hasn't hurt your future musical endeavors, consider yourself lucky, because it usually does. Taking the high road has always worked best for me; it's interesting how many times my path has crossed an ex-band mate and I was usually glad we didn't have to deal with the animosity and awkwardness of a bad parting of ways.
 
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#79
Volunteerk9 said:
Dead Flowers
Bad Liver and a Broken Heart
Aint Much Left of Me
Pink Houses *
Honkytonk Woman *
-original tune that no one knows
One Horse Town
You Can Have the Crown
White Lightning
Last Dance With Mary Jane *
Working Mans Blues
Red House
Jealous Again *
Keep Your Hands To Yourself *

The songs with an * goes over really well. The others....not so much and yet they show up on the setlist time after time. Theyre good songs, but unless your into the bands that play them originally, you'll never hear them on the radio. Last night was a complete trainwreck. I could not get off the stage fast enough. BL was loaded...jumped around on stage like Flea...(we're a Southern Rock kinda deal)...forgot verses on 3 different songs...was 15 minutes late on start time...The good news is the group we opened for was great. A really good bunch of guys that Ive never met before, but was really tight with all their songs.
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There is a circuit around here of bands with this type of repertoire, some with very good players. I call it the Elephant's Graveyard circuit.

This set list would probably work at the local country club (for a few more years, anyway), which pays better than the bars. :p
 
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