Just going to update this thread since it has recently been bumped. Since I posted this in frustration, things have been going a bit better. We still have to talk about volume sometimes, but With my 500w amp going through a 2x10 and a 1x15 and the volume knob at 2 (not 2 oclock.. let's call it 8 oclock.) I have felt almost too loud when it was just me and the lead guitarist. I tend to end up in the middle of the room while we play, because that's where one of our floor monitors are and I like to stand right in front of the kick drum. Upon reducing my volume level to 7 oclock (1) I was a bit too quiet..but turning back up to 2 I'm one of the most powerful sounds in the room. And I think some of the guitarists pedals are way louder than his clean signal but, we have made a lot of progress.
I have since managed to get all of the instruments/vocals mic'd or lined in to a zoom r16, (except drums..only the kick drum..and then the rest of the drummer's kit is going through a 12 channel mixer into the zoom, I then took the zoom and put the left output to the lead guitarist/vocalist's PA, and the right output to the drummer's PA. It's been kind of nice..everybody's going through the monitors.. we've gotten our rehearsal volumes lower and personally I think we're sounding better than ever.
If anything I'm embarassed for airing my dirty laundry on the internet. Thanks for the pics of the boxes holding amps off the ground! Still want to get around to building some boxes like this. I love it.