Twilight Zone Moments

[JanusZarate]

Fellow bassists - have you been to the Twilight Zone and survived to tell the tale? I'd love to hear about it!

This thread is intended for tales of the strange, the weird, the unusual, and the nonsensical. Feel free to share your stories of bass-playing adventures that are at odds with the fabric of reality.

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I'll start with one that just happened to me today.

I walk into a music shop near my work, next to where I was getting lunch. The shop is fairly odd, sporting just a handful of string instruments, guitars, electric pianos, one precision bass. I notice the wall behind the counter has a small assortment of acoustic and electric guitar strings. I don't see any bass strings. A lanky, elderly gentleman in the back of the shop walks up to the counter; I presume he is the owner or manager. Eerily, he reminds me of the Tall Man. This exchange ensues:

ME: "Do you carry bass strings?"
HIM: "Sure do."​

He reaches for the lone pack of larger strings on the rack. It is a clear and open plastic pouch with four white envelopes, each marked with the string gauge and nothing more. There are no other identifying marks on the package.

ME: "What brand are these?"
HIM: "Fender - they're really nice."
ME: "Do you carry Ernie Ball?"
HIM: "What? No one carries those anymore."
ME: "I see. I'll pass on these. Thanks anyway."​

I believe I found our local door to the Twilight Zone.

 

[xgator4u]

Was the name of the store "Needful Things" ?

 

[bassbully]

There is an old dusty music store near my home. It has been there for 50 years. The owner is old and crabby but a good guitar player in his days.

The place reeks of 50 years of his chain smoking but I like it there.
This place just takes me back to the 70's when I was a kid in music stores dreaming of a strat looking at them on the walls unable to touch.
The same grumpy type salesmen with camel in mouth saying .."what ya want kid?

He mostly sells cheap beginner gear saying the good Ol' days of playing guitar are gone. Kids don't care about rock and roll anymore.
He said Mom and pop will buy a $100 guitar and $40.00 amp since most kids will throw it in the closet in a month. He has a point. He blames GC for ripping off parents selling them expensive gear. He feels his MIC $100 knockoff he sets up will out play a 3k guitar anyone else sells.

So he sells disposable guitars and basses all MIC and with weird off brand names. He will take consignments and buys and sells used gear, sometimes there are a few good guitars/basses in there.
I bought a gorgeous Trans blue Carvin from him years ago but didn't bond with it.

Its a place where you feel the carpet moving under your feet from the dust and dirt. The smell of cigs, mold and sweat. I like it, enjoy going there and talking to the owner.
The owner has had recent serious health problems. If it was gone I would miss that store since its one of a kind today..a true throwback place.

One time I was in the store and asked him ....do you have flatwound bass strings?
He looked at me and snorted out... flatwounds? Only old men play flatwounds you need rounds.

 

[The Chuck]

One time, we were playing a gig at Lake Hopatcong in NJ. It was a small place that had been there for decades. Everything was going very well. Our playing was tight and the crowd was really liking us.

Then after our first set it started. This older drunk lady got up after every song we played and she asked if would play some Bob Seger. We would politely tell her that we didn't know any of his songs well enough to play, but every time we finished a tune, shed ask again... over and over and over and over......

I don't know if I was in the Twilight Zone or if she was!

 

[JanusZarate]

Was the name of the store "Needful Things" ?

If it was, I'd have a suspiciously underpriced pack of Slinky strings in my hand right now.

 

[mellowinman]

I'm standing in the music store. No one is behind the counter. I can't find my juju beans. I am alone. Utterly, and completely alone. I'm nervous. I've never felt like this in a music store. I am uncomfortable. I've forgotten what it is I came in for. Was it new strings? Maybe. Picks? I always need picks. I begin to feel a cramp in my stomach. Maybe-the-picks-will-be-the-right-color-but-how-do-I-know-for-sure-they-are-the-rightguageortheywillfeelallrightinmyhandohmygodohmygodohmygod... CALM DOWN.

I don't need any stupid picks. I don't even know if I need anything. I wish I could just noodle on an instrument, but why is there nobody here? I find it strange. Too strange. Why do I feel a breeze? Why is it so cold in here? Well, that's just stupid. I thought I shut the front door, but it's just standing wide O....

 

[Biggbass]

Not music store or music related but:

Many years ago, while fishing on a river shore and wading out into the river while reeling in a fish, I accidentally get washed into the river and end up caught in a whirling rip current over a very deep pit in the river bed. My line gets tangled around me and I become exhausted from fighting the current, am nearing the end, and about to drown. Gasping and yelling I look to the shore and see an old man who reaches into his tackle box and connects a practice bob to his line, then casts it out to me. It hits the water right in front of me and I grab it. The old man pulls me from the current and I make it to shore, crawling out of the river on my hands and knees. But when I look up to thank him there is no one there...No one anywhere near the area...No one.
I've never been back to that river. It was the door to the Twilight Zone and a portal to the other side.

 

[SirMjac28]

I recently visited a newly opened Music Go Round I was thinking about selling my Mesa M3 Carbine combo now I know going in the number they come up with is going to be around half of what it's worth but it would save me from using Craig's List or shipping it out.


HIM: "Welcome to Music Go Round"
ME: "Thanks I was waiting for this one to open up"
HIM: "What you got there?"
ME: " A Mesa M3 Carbine"
HIM: "We need to take the head out"
ME: "?????... It's a great amp with a tube preamp"
HIM: " Tube preamp? in a solid state amp?"
ME: " Yeah it's pretty common"

Now the kid gets a bass plugs it in and it sounds great he then goes over to the computer looking up prices and we engage in some idle chit chat he then writes down a number on a piece of paper".

HIM: "I can give you $300.00 we had one sit here for a month and it was hard to sell.
ME: "I find that incredible since you've only been open two weeks and I can say with the utmost certainty you have never seen a combo like this walk through the door in this little neck of the woods".
HIM: Blank Stare
ME: " Thanks but I think I'll pass have a great day"

 

[Wooly John]

I was walking home from a part of town I didn't know well - late winter afternoon so it was dark out - I passed a small music store and went in - someone was coming out as I entered - there was a bell over the door - as I went in I saw a woman going into the back of the store - she had her back to me and, as the bell only rang once as the other person was leaving, she didn't know I was in the store - old brick place with wood floor - it was completely silent, I was there alone - I started to look at the guitars on the wall when there was a loud bang as a trapdoor in the floor was thrown open - the head of a bald zombie-looking guy poked out from the basement - he looked around, saw me, then ducked down, pulling the trapdoor closed behind him - no one came out of the back - I left - the bell over the door sounded as I left, but I didn't wait to see if anyone responded

 

[KickingBass]

nanana you have entered the Twilight Zone haha I was just listening to Rush's Twilight Zone today, cool interesting thread, keep it up

 

[Geekydad]

If I remember correctly, some chain stores shuffle employees from other locations when they first open up to cover positions until they're hired up to full staff. It's possible he worked at a different store and was thinking of an amp there? But at that price, yeah, just walk.

I recently visited a newly opened Music Go Round I was thinking about selling my Mesa M3 Carbine combo now I know going in the number they come up with is going to be around half of what it's worth but it would save me from using Craig's List or shipping it out.


HIM: "Welcome to Music Go Round"
ME: "Thanks I was waiting for this one to open up"
HIM: "What you got there?"
ME: " A Mesa M3 Carbine"
HIM: "We need to take the head out"
ME: "?????... It's a great amp with a tube preamp"
HIM: " Tube preamp? in a solid state amp?"
ME: " Yeah it's pretty common"

Now the kid gets a bass plugs it in and it sounds great he then goes over to the computer looking up prices and we engage in some idle chit chat he then writes down a number on a piece of paper".

HIM: "I can give you $300.00 we had one sit here for a month and it was hard to sell.
ME: "I find that incredible since you've only been open two weeks and I can say with the utmost certainty you have never seen a combo like this walk through the door in this little neck of the woods".
HIM: Blank Stare
ME: " Thanks but I think I'll pass have a great day"

 

[xgator4u]

If I remember correctly, some chain stores shuffle employees from other locations when they first open up to cover positions until they're hired up to full staff. It's possible he worked at a different store and was thinking of an amp there? But at that price, yeah, just walk.

Sure it's possible.
But more probable is that he was a manager trainee for Guitar Center.
That or the grill man from McDonalds.

 

[strictlybass_ic]

There's a small music store here in town that's been here for decades. It is less a store than the old guy who owns it's trophy room. Maybe half a dozen random guitars a couple old amps and a random assortment of picks, strings, and a few accessories. The average hobby guitar player probably has a larger selection of items to offer. It's only open from like 10-3 on odd weekdays and half the times I've gone by there's a sign on the door that says "out, be back in XX". To my knowledge not one person has ever bought anything there. In fact i went in with a guitarist friend who stumbled across one of the old amps and decided that he loved it and wanted to buy it. He tells the guy at the counter he likes it and he'll take it. The dude refuses to sell it to him, without providing any reason, just keeps telling him "it ain't for sale". Despite all of this it somehow remains in business and presumably open (I've only seen it twice with my own eyes, but I guess it happens).

 

[Tanner5382]

I was walking home from a part of town I didn't know well - late winter afternoon so it was dark out - I passed a small music store and went in - someone was coming out as I entered - there was a bell over the door - as I went in I saw a woman going into the back of the store - she had her back to me and, as the bell only rang once as the other person was leaving, she didn't know I was in the store - old brick place with wood floor - it was completely silent, I was there alone - I started to look at the guitars on the wall when there was a loud bang as a trapdoor in the floor was thrown open - the head of a bald zombie-looking guy poked out from the basement - he looked around, saw me, then ducked down, pulling the trapdoor closed behind him - no one came out of the back - I left - the bell over the door sounded as I left, but I didn't wait to see if anyone responded

That is seriously creepy.

 

[SirMjac28]

If I remember correctly, some chain stores shuffle employees from other locations when they first open up to cover positions until they're hired up to full staff. It's possible he worked at a different store and was thinking of an amp there? But at that price, yeah, just walk.

He was looking at something on the counter I'm not sure if it was a script but the way he said it may me believe he was fresh out of the academy

 

[static0verdrive]

I've got a story about recording from back when I played drums that freaked out the whole band...

My parents moved to a house that had an old barn when I was 16 and shortly thereafter I was jamming in a 3-man group. We loved complicated riffs and time signatures. One day we were recording our parts separately in the barn using a Tascam TAPE-based 4-track - and the song at hand was pretty simple drums-wise, in 4.

I'm up, recording the drum part. After the guitar solo I've got a fill as it changes to the chorus... What the hell?! I'm off by a beat. OK, I'm not great at fills anyway and I know it - my strength is odd time signatures. They roll their eyes and the tape back for another take.

It happens again. Alright; this time they mock me and I deserve it. "You rock 17/16 but can't get that?" "Haha. Rewind let's do it."

It happens again! OK what the hell. They're just annoyed now, but I swear something is up. Without taking off the headphones I head over to the Tascam and just rewind a few bars...

"There's an extra beat!" I exclaim.

They laugh. "We didn't record an extra beat man."

"Listen!"

Very weird. We can't figure how or why but there IS an extra beat now. I laugh and suggest I just play it as a crash and it'll be one bar of 5, and that's all there is to it. People won't notice because we do that sort of thing on purpose enough in other songs. They scratch their heads, shrug and agree.

I nail it! Or so I think... What the hell, I'm off by a beat AGAIN! The extra beat no longer exists!! They don't believe me until they hear it for themselves.

I finally got my part done but we were never able to explain what happened. If it had been a digital multitrack I'd chalk it up to a ghost in the machine, but TAPE?! Queue the Twilight Zone theme..

 

[mellowinman]

I've got a story about recording from back when I played drums that freaked out the whole band...

My parents moved to a house that had an old barn when I was 16 and shortly thereafter I was jamming in a 3-man group. We loved complicated riffs and time signatures. One day we were recording our parts separately in the barn using a Tascam TAPE-based 4-track - and the song at hand was pretty simple drums-wise, in 4.

I'm up, recording the drum part. After the guitar solo I've got a fill as it changes to the chorus... What the hell?! I'm off by a beat. OK, I'm not great at fills anyway and I know it - my strength is odd time signatures. They roll their eyes and the tape back for another take.

It happens again. Alright; this time they mock me and I deserve it. "You rock 17/16 but can't get that?" "Haha. Rewind let's do it."

It happens again! OK what the hell. They're just annoyed now, but I swear something is up. Without taking off the headphones I head over to the Tascam and just rewind a few bars...

"There's an extra beat!" I exclaim.

They laugh. "We didn't record an extra beat man."

"Listen!"

Very weird. We can't figure how or why but there IS an extra beat now. I laugh and suggest I just play it as a crash and it'll be one bar of 5, and that's all there is to it. People won't notice because we do that sort of thing on purpose enough in other songs. They scratch their heads, shrug and agree.

I nail it! Or so I think... What the hell, I'm off by a beat AGAIN! The extra beat no longer exists!! They don't believe me until they hear it for themselves.

I finally got my part done but we were never able to explain what happened. If it had been a digital multitrack I'd chalk it up to a ghost in the machine, but TAPE?! Queue the Twilight Zone theme..

It's easily explained by simple Quantum Physics. When you were recording the part, your part of the Earth was directly over the Eastern Time Zone, as it had been at the time of composition. As you shifted from that spot, wavelengths were compressed, and it fooled you into thinking there was an extra beat. So you recorded to what your primitive brain had imagined, and now you were off by the exact amount the Earth had rotated while you and your friends injured your little puzzlers trying to understand things that are, frankly, beyond you. Give up all this rock and roll foolishness, and go back to school. It's obvious you're simply not ready for the big wide world of science that is just waiting for its chance to eat you.

Take some time to think about that, and as soon as you understand it, you will have to come to grips with the fact that I just totally made it all up.

 

[petrus61]

I went to a junk shop in the middle of nowhere once that was selling the usual selection of comic books, lamps and plastic flowers. Amidst the clutter I found a box full of factory sealed Hartke bass strings. I asked the shop keeper how much.

"Those? Not for sale."

"Ok. Any reason why?"

"Because I wouldn't GIVE THEM TO MY WORST ENEMY."

"Fair enough."

 

[petrus61]

One time, we were playing a gig at Lake Hopatcong in NJ. It was a small place that had been there for decades. Everything was going very well. Our playing was tight and the crowd was really liking us.

Then after our first set it started. This older drunk lady got up after every song we played and she asked if would play some Bob Seger. We would politely tell her that we didn't know any of his songs well enough to play, but every time we finished a tune, shed ask again... over and over and over and over......

I don't know if I was in the Twilight Zone or if she was!

I would think I was in the twilight zone if someone didn't ask that at a gig!

 

[fourstringdrums]

I'm a drummer first and I was jamming with a bassist and guitarist in the basement of a house that I'm certain now could have been a meth den. The whole time we're playing I'm painfully aware that neither of them are in tune. I finally say something and the guitarist tunes and then I notice the bassist is trying to tune to the guitarist and having a hard time getting his bass in tune. He had decent chops but just was struggling with this basic skill. I finally said to him "Do you know how to tune with harmonics?" to which he replies "What are harmonics?" I ask him if I can see the bass and I proceed to tune it for him.

My other weird experience was when I worked at a local store and there was a druggie who would come in about twice a week and ask us to tune his guitar. Each time he left he'd always say thanks and that he'd be back in a couple days.