Hey, I don't think I've ever posted in one of your threads Mikaela, but I just wanted to add onto this.
You claim that you make attempts to make friends, but your attempts always end up with the other person hating you. I believe everyone (especially a single mom) needs a support system. (Whether they be friends or professionals.) Friends offer incredible and priceless support during hardship and are free (granted, for as long as the support goes both ways). Do you ever ask yourself why people do not like you (and illness is NOT an excuse, as there are all levels of psycho out there and I am friends with a few. You also seem like you can hold your own in an online community.) or asked someone why they think people do not like you. You must detach yourself from their responses as only you will benefit from their honesty. Once you have come to terms with the reasons, you must be willing to work on them. I believe you can make friends, but you will need to want it enough to make the changes. Everyone needs a little help here and then.
Well hello Heist,
I don't believe you have, either. I don't know how to say this, so.. I'll put it this way.. Have you seen my very first threads here? That's me. That's how I am on the inside. No one here liked me then, either and I can't blame them.
On one hand I have people saying I worry too much about what others think and shouldn't try to make everyone happy, and on the other I have people saying I should try to change to make other people happy.
I don't know what the right thing to do here is, and while I DO try to look at WHY people don't like me, people usually don't even give me a chance to know me. Not everyone is as understanding as the people here and when I have to make split second decisions (unlike here where I can think about something and re-type it a billion times) I tend to be very awkward. Also, I twitch and make weird gestures and in general people tend to just talk to me like I'm a child or they just avoid me. While I understand what you're saying, I honestly do NOT stop thinking about why people don't like me and why people don't want to hang out with me and I can't figure it out other than the fact that I'm very weird and awkward.
Plus, I never kept in touch with my friends from high school or whatever and as an adult it seems very hard, to me, to make friends. As an adult when I walk up to a stranger somewhere and introduce myself and start talking, people just tend to just look at me like I'm crazy or they just fain that they're paying attention while just waiting to talk about themselves and not really relating to anything I've said.
I'm sure that I'm hard to understand and I tend to speak in broken sentences and mumble and all of that, and that IS my fault, but I'm trying to do better in social groups.
I also have a hard time trusting people because of what I've gone through and all of the people who've hurt me. I'm trying to work on that, too.
I
have asked people why they don't like me, and generally they just walk away from me or tell me because I'm crazy. While I applaud you on your ability to see through people's craziness and see who they really are, not everyone is like that and certainly not people around here, imo.
All I can do is try and hope for the best and I will continue to do so.
Thanks for the advice. I'll do my best
**edit: Thank you, Rosie for putting things into words better and I sincerely appreciate the advice.
Actually, I wish I could find some ladies with better ones.. *ahem* for.. healing purposes, of course. 
