We’re a cover band and our drummer plays some songs way too slow, like 15-20 bpm slow. And a few too fast by the same margin. The guitar player or myself will say something like that was too slow or you need to pick it up a little. We’ll play it again and it’s still at least 10 bpm slow. Then I’ll say that was better but it’s still slow and he gets offended, and says it doesn’t really matter that much as long a we’re all on the same page or he’ll hand me the sticks as if to say, don’t tell me how to play drums. One time I suggested we play the songs in question with a metronome playing through the PA and he gets all offended and says I’m not playing with a metronome. As the bass player I practice all of our songs with a bass backing track of the original song, so I’m intimately familiar with the pace of particular songs and it’s absolutely torturous playing these song 15-20 bpm slower than I usually play them. It’s just hard having to play at this slower pace and it feels like it just sucks the energy of whatever song we’re doing. He’s a good drummer and he plays the songs accurately except for the pace. What can we do to get him to play at the right speed?
I wish that Talkbass had the Reddit equivalent of the "serious" tag to weed out all the "fire the drummer" jokes.
One thing that you didn't mention in your post is whether his tempo is consistent. If his tempo is consistent but too slow, that's one problem. If his tempo fluctuates because he's dragging on fills or something, that's a different problem. I'm going to assume that you have the former problem, which is a much better problem to have.
Some people have already posted solutions, but this is Talkbass, so I'll chime in and repeat some stuff:
1. Your drummer doesn't necessarily have to be the person to do a count-in. Someone else can set the tempo.
2. If you're having trouble telling the drummer to pick up the tempo, try playing a version where you tell him to play it too fast - just as a fun experiment. If you get what you want, the band can do the "oh, man, that was awesome" thing, and make that the new arrangement.
3. Sometimes, as @LBS-bass said, musicians have "music memory" - sometimes a song feels wrong because you're subconsciously thinking of a different version. (Nirvana did two versions of Polly - one slow and acoustic, and one that's basically a punk song. If you haven't heard one, the other would sound wrong.) Maybe this is the case with the drummer. This isn't a bad thing - music memory and feel is actually a very good thing - but if this is the case, you need to be on the same page.
If your drummer's tempo is fluctuating due to fills or if it wilts over time, that's a separate issue and not easy to deal with.
For what it's worth, I've never really been successful with pushing or pulling the tempo on bass in a reasonable way to indicate that a drummer should slow down or speed up.
Try playing your songs "too fast" and see what that nets you. Good luck.
