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Why do I have to want a P...

You can find a decent used Squier super cheap. I see them on CL all the time for $100 or less. I just picked up a 2000-2001 Squier Affinity P for $40 at a pawn shop (talked them down some because the jack was jacked up, had a cracked pickguard and loose, scratchy knobs, plus it had been sitting in there forever.

Took it home, put it under the knife for a few cosmetic and electronics mods and, voila! Plays really nice...sweet neck with low action, no buzzing or dead spots...looks, feels and sounds great (IMO) for under $150 total:

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