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why do we lock to the kick drum?

I hear no kick drum when I write my tunes (and I write most of the tunes in my band). The drummer is theoretically finding a way to lock to my bass line, though on occasion I find myself having to adjust my lines to make that easier or more effective. I suppose that's a luxury of creation. I don't dare tell a drummer how to drum (especially this one). At times, that leads to some unanticipated consequences (when I'm left hanging) but that is compensated for by unexpected serendipities (glorious fills).
 
Other than Reggae and afro-cuban music where they anticipate the 1 ( the and of 4)? What music (style/idiom) doesn't emphasize the first beat of the bar? Celeb musicians?...lol I think that minimizes James Brown's enormous contribution to American Music. Should we disregard what Louis Armstrong or Charlie Parker said as well?
Aren't two very popular styles of music enough to make it be something you don't do across the board? And while we're at it, not all rock and roll or dance music emphasizes the one straight up and down every time, either. And no, we shouldn't disregard what Louis and Bird said...when playing trad jazz or bebop. But it's probably not always applicable to fusion, prog/jazz, or smooth jazz. And Duke Ellington once said, "It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing," but I can name you countless songs that mean a lot that don't swing even a little.

So I have to meet your sarcastic attempt to reject what I said with this:

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From a production and composition standpoint they simply suite each other. Kick drums have a relatively fast attack and release whereas a bass guitar's attack is not nearly as prominent, and it has a relatively moderate decay. Given their range is relative close, these two locking in just makes things fatter.
 
Then the bass player dies. So a new bassist comes along. What does everyone tell him? Just match the bass drum.
I swear it happened just like this.
Well, not exactly, depending. Seriously, this happened to me once. I was the original bassist with the party band I play with now. In the late 90's we parted ways, amicably, for family obligations, work relocations, and other projects. In 2012, they contacted me, their long-time bass player had died, and "exercised the reserve clause." I was the only other bass player in the area that knew the core of the repertoire, and could learn the rest of it quickly. I learned, or relearned, or reviewed, the entire 3-hour set in two days. No rehearsal. I got to the gig, glad to see the front guys, introduced myself to the new drummer, asked which side he wanted me to set up on, and prepped for the gig, including a sound check. Like my post above, I watched his right hand for tempo and style, coordinated with his bass drum since he knew what each song needed, and simplified a couple of lines here and there to keep everything going. The gig went well, and I have been back on board ever since.

He looked surprised when I said I didn't listen to drummers. As his eyes got wide, I explained what I posted here: I watch them, especially the dominant hand, to learn how they set the tempo and style, and then match, and discuss points as they arise.

After about six months back with the band, he complimented me that I was the best bassist he had ever played with. He has a 40+ career gig playing everything from the east coast to the Midwest, teaches, and we have frequent discussions on the finer points of what kind of rhythms and styles make up a particular genre, as we play a very wide repertoire and do our best to sound authentic to the songs of each genre we play during a gig.
 
Because it sounds and feels right. However, there are plenty of examples of fine players who don't do this. Peter Cetera, when he played bass for Chicago, played very lyrically and created some pretty neat counterpoint (Beginnings). John Paul Jones of Led Zep often locked in with Jimmy Page (Black Dog) instead of John Bonham's fabulous kick.
 
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