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Would you date someone with HIV?

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#181
For some reason I was thinking about this thread and recalled this couple that I kind of knew.

A friend of my mom's met this guy after quitting his wife. They both really liked each other and decided to both get tested as they wanted to get serious/exclusive. Turns the guy had HIV. They chose to move forward. For all I know they were very happy until last year when the one with HIV died. After many years together. (I'm not aware if the cause of death was his disease, my mom's friend has been retired for a while now, considering age it could be many things).

Just thought I'd share.
 
#182
Ziltoid said:
For some reason I was thinking about this thread and recalled this couple that I kind of knew.

A friend of my mom's met this guy after quitting his wife. They both really liked each other and decided to both get tested as they wanted to get serious/exclusive. Turns the guy had HIV. They chose to move forward. For all I know they were very happy until last year when the one with HIV died. After many years together. (I'm not aware if the cause of death was his disease, my mom's friend has been retired for a while now, considering age it could be many things).

Just thought I'd share.
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Could have been lupus.
 
#183
Tituscrow said:
If an AIDS cure was developed, patented and mass-produced, promiscuity will always provide a steady market, with the added factor that knowing a cure was possible, wouldn't it increase?

Some serious tinfoil-hat material in this thread.
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There's also a lot of ignorance in this thread as well.

Invalid Link Removed

Check out the numbers for Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, Syphilis then check out the numbers for HIV, draw your own conclusions.
 
#187
SXema said:
Too late, but I think most of the responses here are disgusting and this is the WORST thread on TB. If HIV turns undetectable you can't get infected, period. Everybody deserves love and company.
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Everyone deserves? Are partners assigned? You live your life and make your choices and if there’s an aspect of you that’s undesirable to someone else, whether it’s HIV (undetectable or not) or a second toe that’s longer than the big toe, no one owes you a relationship. To suggest that it’s disgusting for someone not to want to be with someone with HIV is ludicrous.
 
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#190
SXema said:
Too late, but I think most of the responses here are disgusting and this is the WORST thread on TB. If HIV turns undetectable you can't get infected, period. Everybody deserves love and company.
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Yup. But, more importantly, everyone deserves honesty and clarity around life-altering diseases. Beyond that, everyone deserves to avoid the stress of same.

Other than that....thanks for digging up this 5 year old gem.
 
#193
As I understand it, since this thread was originally posted 5 years ago, there have been several great advances in keeping the disease in check and under control. Not a complete cure, but causing it to be much less of an issue in a sexual relationship, as long as it's honest above all else (something I already expect.)

I would certainly consider it, depending on how it were breached to me. I'd have do much more current research if faced with that choice.

And someone's faulty behavior that's years in the past I can often overlook, as I've certainly got my own stories ... they just involve luckier endings.
 
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#194
OK, I met a woman a couple of years ago, and we seemed to be falling in love. She disclosed she had an STD, (not HIV,) and I researched how we could be safe, and then realized I just wasn't comfortable with it. Had we been farther along in the relationship it might have been different, but I chose to break it off. I broke her heart, and whether anyone believes it or not, felt very hurt myself, because she was quite wonderful, and sweet. It meant a lot to me that she disclosed before we crossed that line, and she will always hold a special place in my heart. I guess I took the selfish road because of the question, "what if I get it, and then we don't work out, and now I'm the one who has to disclose to potential partners?"

The next woman I dated was a health care worker, and told me she got stabbed with a needle by an infected person, and was doing a ton of testing. That's when I realized I may have been fairly safe over the years, but being tested is never a bad idea. I awaited my test results with my heart in my chest, and when I was cleared, I knew I would always be using safe practices.

I don't judge anyone for what they have, or how they got it. I am traditional in my approach to love, sex and relationships, but I have definitely used poor judgment more than once, and in the heat of the moment, anyone could. The lady in the first part of this was a victim of a man she was in a stable relationship with, who chose not to disclose. How could she have seen that coming?
 
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#196
SXema said:
Too late, but I think most of the responses here are disgusting and this is the WORST thread on TB. If HIV turns undetectable you can't get infected, period. Everybody deserves love and company.
Click to expand...

I would not turn away from a person because they had AIDS, but I would not be in a sexual relationship with them. It would be the same with any other disease that could be transferred in that manner if there was no treatment.
 
#199
toowrongfoo said:
E, the mods wouldn't like that (and they are out to get me)
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It's like you're trying to get an infraction. Just stop.

SXema said:
Too late, but I think most of the responses here are disgusting and this is the WORST thread on TB.
Click to expand...

It was buried before you brought it back. I'm truly sorry that you found it upsetting though, and wish you luck. I'm closing this now.
 
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