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You should smile!

Gopherbassist

Gopherbassist

Jan 19, 2008
2,957
4,466
AMERICA! 🇺🇸🦅
#1
On a somewhat regular basis I will have random strangers come up to me and tell me to smile.

The other day I had some old woman tell me that I am very hansom when I smile, but that I'm ugly with a frown on my face. I thought it was odd, and wondered when this random person that had never seen me before even had a chance to see me smile or frown. The interaction irritated me a little bit, but I just let it go. Last week I was at church and had some guy lecture me for 20 minutes about not smiling enough. Since TBers don't know, this is my face

NoBeard.jpg


That's just what it looks like. I don't consider myself a very emotive person. I smile, frown, scowl, or have a surprised look on my face when the occasion calls for it. Otherwise, I just have my regular, relaxed muscle, neutral face on that you see in the picture above.

Since this started, about 9 years ago, I've taken some time to observe people that I see walking around. Most people just look neutral, some have some kind of genuine emotion on their face based on what is occurring around them, but a small few I've seen with something very troubling to me: a fake smile.

As I've come to recognize fakes smiles, I've also come to the conclusion that they are vile ghastly things. I've come to recognize them by the fact that only the mouth of the person is smiling, and not their eyes, the part that really makes the smile.

This all makes me wonder why random people on the street tell me to smile, and has led me to the conclusion that I'd rather wear a real frown than a fake smile.

For those thinking tl;dr
What do you think of people telling other people to smile when they don't know that person's emotions? What are your thoughts on fake smiles?
 
#2
I used to hang out with a group of people about a year ago, and one particular girl in this group was always smiling. Even when she was clearly upset at something that had been said she would try to keep a smile on her face. Likewise, I actually had a friend back in grade school whose mom would also smile constantly.

To be completely honest, I always found both of those people kinda creepy. They weren't bad people by any means, but it just really freaked me out.
 
#4
Ive had people telling me to smile since first grade. Everybody always thinks im pissed off, when im really just "not" happy. Not sad, but not happy either. Neutral, as i believe you said.

I hate my smile anyway.
 
#6
What a fake smile says to me, "I'm full of sh$t", at least on some level. Whether they're completely full of it is something I can only find out by learning more, but it doesn't bode well, to be sure.

Just a thought, but instead of giving yourself a choice of either a fake smile or a real frown, why not throw a real smile in there as one of your options as well? Once you get comfortable with it, I'm sure those other two options won't get used much at all! ;)
 
#7
bassinplace said:
What a fake smile says to me, "I'm full of sh$t", at least on some level. Whether they're completely full of it is something I can only find out by learning more, but it doesn't bode well, to be sure.

Just a thought, but instead of giving yourself a choice of either a fake smile or a real frown, why not throw a real smile in there as one of your options as well? Once you get comfortable with it, I'm sure those other two options won't get used much at all! ;)
Click to expand...
I think you missed my point. I do smile, but only when one is warranted. I'd rather wear a real frown that a fake smile because I don't misrepresent myself.
 
#8
bassinplace said:
Just a thought, but instead of giving yourself a choice of either a fake smile or a real frown, why not throw a real smile in there as one of your options as well? Once you get comfortable with it, I'm sure those other two options won't get used much at all! ;)
Click to expand...

Nice! +1

Gopherbassist said:
I think you missed my point. I do smile, but only when one is warranted. I'd rather wear a real frown that a fake smile because I don't misrepresent myself.
Click to expand...

I interpreted what bassinplace said more as "give yourself a reason to smile more often".
 
#16
When I don't smile people always assume that I'm mad. Guess I just have one of those "stern" faces. Which, I guess, is no big deal but makes me think of all the awesome random people I could have made a connection with that were deterred by my facial expression in "neutral". Realization of this has reminded to always smile at anyone that crosses my path.
 
#19
People used to tell me to smile because my default face makes them think I'm mad. I've cultivated a sort-of "barely smile" that I put on my face whenever I greet someone or I'm talking to someone in a professional setting. You're right - it is in the eyes, not necessarily the mouth. I don't fake-smile at all, I just try to keep my eyes inviting rather than my usual "thoughtful" look. I suppose when I'm thinking, I lower my eyebrows or something.
 

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