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Adding a second chick singer?

#61
Jah Wobble Fan said:
Timely topic as I too have been thinking about adding a second chick.
Not a second singer, mind you -- just a second chick. Thoughts?
Click to expand...

I think that is an entirely different issue. In OP's case, the potential problem (IMO) is that the current singer would perceive the addition of another "chick" singer as a competitor, and might feel like people didn't like her, or that she was in danger of being replaced, etc. As I mentioned before, I would have the exact same concern if the two singers were guys (and especially if the current singer, like OP's, was "unstable" and had a fragile ego). So to me the issue was never "chick-ness" per se. I wouldn't have nearly the same level of concern if OP's band was thinking about adding a second guitarist, for example, who happened to be a woman.
 
#62
I'm not the best singer in the world, but I get my fair share of compliments. I've been in situations where I've had to try to sing with a cold/flu. It's not easy. Your voice goes to crap, you hate your tone, it's hard to sustain any notes without coughing, and your range diminishes. For a gig I'd give it a shot, but for rehearsal? Not so much. Not to mention that as I've gotten older, I've realized that the only thing you really do when you get a cold and go to work is infect the people around you.

Think of it like playing bass with oven mitts on. You might be able to produce something passable, but you're not going to be happy with it.

Lobomov said:
And what do I know .. maybe it makes no sense to sing, if you're under the flu?
Click to expand...
 
#63
randyripoff said:
I'm not the best singer in the world, but I get my fair share of compliments. I've been in situations where I've had to try to sing with a cold/flu. It's not easy. Your voice goes to crap, you hate your tone, it's hard to sustain any notes without coughing, and your range diminishes. For a gig I'd give it a shot, but for rehearsal? Not so much. Not to mention that as I've gotten older, I've realized that the only thing you really do when you get a cold and go to work is infect the people around you.

Think of it like playing bass with oven mitts on. You might be able to produce something passable, but you're not going to be happy with it.
Click to expand...


It is the second week in row, she's cancelled due to having a cold and coughing, tho its not so bad, that she has missed a single day of work. Is what you write still valid or are you talking being really stay at home sick?
 
#66
Two girls, three singers, three part harmonies, and a playlist packed with high-percentage crowd-pleaser dance floor pop rock hits...

Can't fail. In my neighborhood, just add in a little competent musicianship, dress the part, and you are gauranteed success in the nicer rooms and with the upscale private event client.
 
#67
Lobomov said:
It is the second week in row, she's cancelled due to having a cold and coughing, tho its not so bad, that she has missed a single day of work. Is what you write still valid or are you talking being really stay at home sick?
Click to expand...

One of the things I've discovered over time is that if I do go to work, hang out with friends, etc. when I get a cold, it's going to linger. I've had colds stick around for a couple weeks more than once. However, the reality is that it's difficult for most people to stay home for several days until they get better.

I don't want to make any excuses for your singer, but it's not impossible.
 
#68
So I'm reading back through because this latest illness didn't seem like the original issue... all of a sudden I'm seeing this a whole different way.
And I'm going to go out on a limb: Maybe she's got the vibe that I'm getting in hindsight--and no offense intended, but I'm getting the feeling that you don't actually like her much; maybe she thinks so, too? It's just subtle things you said in your OP:

Lobomov said:
Problem is that our singer is unstable. ...besides she get easily stressed...
...I've been thinking, that we need another singer...
Click to expand...
(/snipped)

Maybe she sees this: New guy joins band. She's the youngest, but starting to feel of an age. Rest of band have more in common with new guy. Vibe changes. "New guy doesn't like me, and this was MY band..." harmony parts in the band aren't coming natural (which is work for her)...
"Work is stressful, and I can't change that, but if I throw myself into it, maybe I'll feel like I'm in control of something..."

Lob - I think the singer doesn't want to do the job anymore. You said she was a long time friend of the drummer, and that you were the "new guy"--you'll be the last to know if she's no longer feeling the spark.

I'm betting you're more on the right track with your idea to get another singer than you realize. I wouldn't quit if you like the other fellows. But I might be looking for that other singer, work up a gig with her, jam, etc.
 
#71
frebassist said:
So I'm reading back through because this latest illness didn't seem like the original issue... all of a sudden I'm seeing this a whole different way.
And I'm going to go out on a limb: Maybe she's got the vibe that I'm getting in hindsight--and no offense intended, but I'm getting the feeling that you don't actually like her much; maybe she thinks so, too? It's just subtle things you said in your OP:


(/snipped)

Maybe she sees this: New guy joins band. She's the youngest, but starting to feel of an age. Rest of band have more in common with new guy. Vibe changes. "New guy doesn't like me, and this was MY band..." harmony parts in the band aren't coming natural (which is work for her)...
"Work is stressful, and I can't change that, but if I throw myself into it, maybe I'll feel like I'm in control of something..."

Lob - I think the singer doesn't want to do the job anymore. You said she was a long time friend of the drummer, and that you were the "new guy"--you'll be the last to know if she's no longer feeling the spark.

I'm betting you're more on the right track with your idea to get another singer than you realize. I wouldn't quit if you like the other fellows. But I might be looking for that other singer, work up a gig with her, jam, etc.
Click to expand...


There is and has always been a weird tension between me and her. I've played with her and the drummer for a short while in a jam setting a few years back and it has always been there, but I was drafted with her blessing and didn't audition for this gig, so there is nothing surprising about our relationship. Btw I do! like her, in many ways she is a sweetheart, but she gets me in the red now and then.

But I don't think that is the issue here. I think you are absolutely right .. the spark is not there no more. I've discussed this with the drummer a lot last few months, and we do pretty much agree that 1. work and stress has her down 2. spark is not there anymore.

She comes from a family of musicians. I think her grandmother was something, tho dunno .. but her uncle is one of the best jazz guitarist in the country, while his daughter (her cousin) having a father that hang out with all the best jazz singers around is really on the rise as a vocalist. Our singer is not in that class. She is good, but has survived mostly on raw talent more than hard work .. and singing is part of her identity and has always been a part of her life. The spark might be gone, but going thru the motions lingers on .. and I think she does feel obliged to sing.


Which as you say another singer seems like an option. Either it will make her pull together and deliver due to the increased competition .. or we will plow on with or without her effort and she slowly fade away if she wishes. I dunno.

The band is great tho. It is one of those units, where focus is mainly on being tight and killing it. So if I leave, that is most likely wasted.
 
#72
Yeah, I was definitely getting that the rest of team members were hard workers--we had a fallout with a member last year, and while I don't miss him a bit, I DO miss the unit that worked so hard to get to where we were. We aren't stretching anymore (because we can't--OT story for another time; maybe we need a chick singer :) ).
I'd hate to see you give it away.
Best of luck, man; I'm rooting for a good resolution!
Jeff
 
#75
randyripoff said:
One of the things I've discovered over time is that if I do go to work, hang out with friends, etc. when I get a cold, it's going to linger. I've had colds stick around for a couple weeks more than once. However, the reality is that it's difficult for most people to stay home for several days until they get better.

I don't want to make any excuses for your singer, but it's not impossible.
Click to expand...
I have to agree with this. Workplace is understaffed. She's got a lot of pressure there and is most likely very invested in what she does. Work does have to come first for most people and a sick day is hard to take for some when they know the resulting complications. I'm that way myself. To the point that I was sick with a bad cold for 2-1/2 weeks last year and reluctantly took two "light" days off to get on top of the thing.

I don't know the exact nature of your inter-group relationships. It sounds like she could use a friend. Someone she knows wants only good for her, who could come alongside her and ask what she would really like to do about this situation. She may not want to relinquish her spot in the band but could use a break. Maybe you guys could find somebody to sub for her for a bit. In the event you find a great singer who clicks really well you may find that singer #1 likes what she brings to the band and is willing to share the stage with her when she can make it. If she's one of the founders of the band, she will always have a certain status that would allow her to appear as a "special guest." Which is a great spot to be in. And nobody's been kicked to the curb.

First of all, the rest of you need to talk. Then you need to talk to her. She deserves to have this discussion before anybody proposes an ultimatum. Sounds like a basicly great band that just needs to deal with a situation. Wishing you all the best with it.
 

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