Uh, that would be those who disagree with you that band members should be on call 24/7 and ready to reply to any message in any media at any time?
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Am I unusual for expecting people to communicate efficiently?
- Thread starter BassyBill
- Start date
Uh, that would be those who disagree with you that band members should be on call 24/7 and ready to reply to any message in any media at any time?
It's understandable that some people might find certain types of communication more convenient than others.
However, I think it's a risky move to insist on only using one form of communication - it only makes you more difficult to work with and in long-run, easier to replace compared to someone who accepts and responds e-mails, texts and phone calls, rather than responding to one and ignoring others.
However, I think it's a risky move to insist on only using one form of communication - it only makes you more difficult to work with and in long-run, easier to replace compared to someone who accepts and responds e-mails, texts and phone calls, rather than responding to one and ignoring others.
Did I say that?Uh, that would be those who disagree with you that band members should be on call 24/7 and ready to reply to any message in any media at any time?
Some guys just don't want it badly enough!Uh, that would be those who disagree with you that band members should be on call 24/7 and ready to reply to any message in any media at any time?
AAARRGh, my drummer is the worst. All forms of communication to him just seem to vanish into a black hole... It's seriously not that hard to say "yeah, I can make it" or "no, I have made plans" or "let me get back to you"...
It makes me CRAZY, that someone can be so discourteous.
It's not unreasonable to expect some form of response, even if it's a lame excuse.
It makes me CRAZY, that someone can be so discourteous.
It's not unreasonable to expect some form of response, even if it's a lame excuse.
Seems to me that as long as you're still dealing with them after an untimely reply, there's no real consequence.
IME, when you set out your expectations and people fail to respect your needs, if you still work with them, you've made yourself out to be a liar and they know it.
Bill
Not sure if this works for you....
1-when a new member joins... we have a written "member guide" that outlines the "rules" ... it has stuff like when you can drink... what to always wear... who does what... how to contact people (and their preferred method).....
It also spells out communication expectations.... for a gigging band, I'll note that the managment areas are more important than the "hot tasty chops"... a guy can be the rawkstar he believes he is... if he doesn't show up sober and on time, he's just another wanker.
2-Facebook.... I do the majority of the booking... we have a silient (private - invisible) facebook group... this seems to work the easiest as communication is organized and comments are in "thread" method... (in the UK there may be a better social group application)
3-"check facebook".... I'll send out an email and text if there is a discussion posted on facebook.... this removes the "I don't check facebook" and helps eliminate the zillions of email banter.
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Solution.
I'm aware this won't work for everyone.... or is within your ethics realms....
I have this situation RIGHT NOW with a drummer... his family (no kids ... just a wife) doesn't get gigging... or scheduling... He's an airline pilot (they really only work 12 days a month ... and know their schedule at least a month in advance...
I found another drummer... got him our set lists and listening disks.
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Scenario
I book a gig .... first people to reply get to play it.... that simple.... it lets the drummer off the hook if he can't manage his personal life... band doesn't pay for his 3 day delay on communicating.
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Silly as it seems, my wife is the slowest to do this communication thing. I'm fortunate as she doesn't freak out when I say "won't be there ... paying gig"
Not sure if this works for you....
1-when a new member joins... we have a written "member guide" that outlines the "rules" ... it has stuff like when you can drink... what to always wear... who does what... how to contact people (and their preferred method).....
It also spells out communication expectations.... for a gigging band, I'll note that the managment areas are more important than the "hot tasty chops"... a guy can be the rawkstar he believes he is... if he doesn't show up sober and on time, he's just another wanker.
2-Facebook.... I do the majority of the booking... we have a silient (private - invisible) facebook group... this seems to work the easiest as communication is organized and comments are in "thread" method... (in the UK there may be a better social group application)
3-"check facebook".... I'll send out an email and text if there is a discussion posted on facebook.... this removes the "I don't check facebook" and helps eliminate the zillions of email banter.
-----
Solution.
I'm aware this won't work for everyone.... or is within your ethics realms....
I have this situation RIGHT NOW with a drummer... his family (no kids ... just a wife) doesn't get gigging... or scheduling... He's an airline pilot (they really only work 12 days a month ... and know their schedule at least a month in advance...
I found another drummer... got him our set lists and listening disks.
-----
Scenario
I book a gig .... first people to reply get to play it.... that simple.... it lets the drummer off the hook if he can't manage his personal life... band doesn't pay for his 3 day delay on communicating.
-----
Silly as it seems, my wife is the slowest to do this communication thing. I'm fortunate as she doesn't freak out when I say "won't be there ... paying gig"
Million dollar post. I wish I was your bandmate.
And I have the same, um, situation with my wife.
|
| Update: A few years ago, I established this ground rule with my wife. Since she doesn't do Calendars and Time/Day management very
| well, I reserve the right to not go to Any family/work/important event not planned in advance, when it is in conflict with a paying
| gig. Done. This arrangement works very well.
|
MNairhead - some great ideas in that post. I quite often work a similar sort of system with sending an email to the whole band and then a text message just say "please check email" and that can work well.
I'm getting more and more sold on the idea that if people are really slow to respond then the gig goes to a sub. We're not really short of choices in that rgeard for the majority of the band.
I'm getting more and more sold on the idea that if people are really slow to respond then the gig goes to a sub. We're not really short of choices in that rgeard for the majority of the band.
I'm continually astonished by this, too. Guys in my own band(s) who just won't bother to respond to simple, but important, questions or pieces of information regarding upcoming events, etc. It's so much more efficient if/when band members when communicate promptly - slows the whole operation down when I have to go to extraordinary means to track them down.
What's even more strange is when the same thing happens with the ones who are full-time players, who presumably can use paying gigs (I'm a part-timer). Really? You're taking forever to get back to me?
(edit: not saying that I'M special, just saying, don't you want a gig? would you rather i call someone else?)
Unfortunately, musicians are too often affected with slacker-itis, and this disease doesn't discriminate on the basis of age, experience, degree of talent, or anything else.
What's even more strange is when the same thing happens with the ones who are full-time players, who presumably can use paying gigs (I'm a part-timer). Really? You're taking forever to get back to me?
(edit: not saying that I'M special, just saying, don't you want a gig? would you rather i call someone else?)
Unfortunately, musicians are too often affected with slacker-itis, and this disease doesn't discriminate on the basis of age, experience, degree of talent, or anything else.
...I have the same, um, situation with my wife.
Update: A few years ago, I established this ground rule with my wife. Since she doesn't do Calendars and Time/Day management very well, I reserve the right to not go to Any family/work/important event not planned in advance, when it is in conflict with a paying
[ot]
My wife finally got calendars/time-day management together after many years of double booking/canceling/missing appointments and many other faux paux regarding scheduling. We found a home calendar with a front pocket for each month that can store medical appointment paper work, maps, game schedules and such. She also keeps her cell phone calendar up to date.
Still, the basic rule is, neither of us can schedule anything regarding family without checking with each other first and checking the calendar for conflicts. Best thing she learned was to replay to every invitation with "I need to check my calendar and with hubby before I can confirm". Not that I control her or anything like that, just out of respect. I do the same for her.
We've been together for a long time so there's no drama involved here, just an attempt to rein in the drama that can surround family scheduling.She usually texts me with any possible upcoming events or changes in scheduling so I can see how they will work into my schedule. I'm usually involved with home projects, practicing, home maintenance and other stuff, this helps me out a lot.
Since most scheduling decisions don't need to be made quickly, this has worked very well. That way, if we agree, she can schedule family events around whatever I'm doing so I can attend. She can also elect to attend them by herself if there's a conflict. I like to attend only about one or two family events per month (due to my hobbies and my personal time) I chose to stay home many times anyways.
One other thing we do is to, if at all possible, not schedule more than one event per day. Too many things happen along the way and there always seems to be a seem kind of problem that happens before or after each event that get in the way. We decline many events do to this rule.
[/ot]
Seriously ... single silent/private facebook group for discussiuon etc... ensures that everyone is communicating on the same topics etc.
As a courtesy I'll send out an email/text (can do both at once in google)... telling them to check..
I'm not a TOTAL dork.. at times I'll get a text "IN -- chk fb ltr" ... that's good enough for me to understand.
Timmy
Been there. I don't have the attention span to deal with people who can't plan things appropriately or communicate. I've got other things to do so hearing things like "You didn't know there was practice?" or "Hey what're you doing right now, we're all jamming" or "We didn't mean to leave you out of the loop, maybe you should text us every day to say what's being planned" isn't in my idea of what a band should do.
Musicians are the worst, but I think it's generally a problem with young people in modern society. People are lazy and inconsiderate.
In my experience though, when people in a band are lazy about communication, it means they don't really care about the band.
In my experience though, when people in a band are lazy about communication, it means they don't really care about the band.
You are not alone - but there is a flip side to this when the guy in charge tends to be too wordy in emails or send emails on a daily basis. You can easily overload 'email-phobes' by sending long, wordy, rambling emails every other day. Pretty soon they all just go numb and you've defeated the efficiency.
In the last couple projects where I acted as director, I made it clear upfront that email was the primary means of communication and that I would make sure everyone had all the info they needed in a timely fashion - and it was their responsibility to check their email and contact me if they needed anything else. If they didn't want to check their email for whatever reason, it was their responsibility to call me and check in - not vice-versa.
As for phoning the 'special needs' players - that's bunk. We directors/coordinators/band-communicators work hard enough getting things together for everyone, composing brief but informative emails and sending them to the entire group in a timely fashion. To then have to pick up the phone and chase after the ones who are 'email challenged' is simply BS. If they are taking their role in the band seriously, they will check their email.
I've gotten even the most email-phobic players on board with using email and while they aren't 'natural' emailers - they understand the importance and the efficiency - and more importantly, they respect the guy whose working so hard on their behalf.
In the last couple projects where I acted as director, I made it clear upfront that email was the primary means of communication and that I would make sure everyone had all the info they needed in a timely fashion - and it was their responsibility to check their email and contact me if they needed anything else. If they didn't want to check their email for whatever reason, it was their responsibility to call me and check in - not vice-versa.
As for phoning the 'special needs' players - that's bunk. We directors/coordinators/band-communicators work hard enough getting things together for everyone, composing brief but informative emails and sending them to the entire group in a timely fashion. To then have to pick up the phone and chase after the ones who are 'email challenged' is simply BS. If they are taking their role in the band seriously, they will check their email.
I've gotten even the most email-phobic players on board with using email and while they aren't 'natural' emailers - they understand the importance and the efficiency - and more importantly, they respect the guy whose working so hard on their behalf.
Did I say that?
Wha? What were we talkin' about? I haven't read the forum in a couple of days ...
check out the Link Removed;
if all us emailers follow these rules, time-wasting email practices will be a thing of the past.
